


The Zoldyck Curse

by mikiyu



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Canonical Child Abuse, Developing Relationship, Eventual Romance, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Trans Alluka Zoldyck, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2020-07-03
Packaged: 2021-01-29 14:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 60,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21411526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mikiyu/pseuds/mikiyu
Summary: Killua's life has always been tainted with the blood of the people he has murdered following, against his will, his family's orders. Trapped between those horrible missions and the walls of his family's mansion, Killua was resigned to his fate. But then, everything changes when he meets Gon.From then on, friendships are forged, secrets are revealed and new threats arise in the boys' lives, all while dealing with the new and unknown feelings that start growing within their hearts.
Relationships: Alluka Zoldyck & Killua Zoldyck, Alluka Zoldyck/Zushi, Gon Freecs & Alluka Zoldyck, Gon Freecs & Alluka Zoldyck & Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecs & Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Kurapika/Leorio Paladiknight
Comments: 177
Kudos: 348





	1. Prologue

At the age of 12, Killua wasn't content with his life. He had always been confined in an enormous mansion, and the only times he was allowed to go outside, he wished he wouldn't, because that meant getting his hands more dirty than they already were, by doing the job his family was famous for. That always involved ripping throats open or shattering beating hearts with his bare hands converted into sharp and deathly weapons, at most it would lead to a short fight with an easy win in which just some droplets of blood were scattered on the floor or his clothes; just like the assassin he was meant to be. Or at least, that was what his family had always told him since he could remember.

Despite living surrounded by people, he didn't have any real friends. Sure, he got along with some of the butlers, like Canary or Gotoh, but they always put their jobs in the first place and never let their encounters and their relationship get too close.

He did have a quite a big family, as well, but he had never felt like a part of it. His parents had trained him all his life to be the perfect assassin, the one who one day, would inherit the family business, something he had never wanted, but they have never cared about. His siblings weren't much better. The oldest was manipulative and kept an eye on all of Killua's movements; another was a tech freak who also enjoyed way too much torturing him; and the youngest hardly talked to him and was so silent that Killua normally forgot about him, but at least, he didn't bother him. The only one that could bring joy to his unwanted and boring life was his little sister.

Actually, Alluka was the reason why he put up with everything else. He obeyed his parent's orders, he allowed Illumi to get through his mind and permitted Milluki's punishments and tortures on himself just to be able to see her, talk to her and play with her, even if it was for a short time. Alluka was really the only light on his life and Killua would do anything for her, to cheer up his days and keep her by his side. He wouldn't allow his family to do anything to her. Well, to _both_ of them, as in fact, he did have two sisters sharing one body, Alluka and Nanika, but the existence of the latter was something only he and Alluka knew.

Killua had thought more than once about leaving. To take his sisters and run away from that place that felt more like a prison than like a real home. To go anywhere else, where they could be free of their family's control and just live a happy and simple life like any other kids their age, just the two of them. That would be perfect.

But Killua knew it wasn't possible, at least for the time being. He had thought of countless plans of action, but in his mind they all failed, always because of the same detail: Illumi. As long as his older brother didn't stop controlling all his movements, he wouldn't be able to initiate his plan without him knowing and cancelling it beforehand. But he didn't lose hope. There had to be a way, a moment in which Illumi lost his attention on him, even if it was just for a second, and he would be ready to take the opportunity. For the moment, he could just wait and keep thinking about it.

In that moment, Killua was just extremely bored. He didn't have any mission until next month and wasn't allowed to visit Alluka more than once a week, and, being Thursday that day, needless to say, he had already done his weekly visit to her. He didn't feel in the mood to keep training any more, either. Although he enjoyed exercising and liked the feeling of becoming stronger, it also was what his family wanted. The stronger he got, the more people he would have to murder, and Killua had never liked killing, even though he had great talent to it. So, he tended not to train too much, just enough to not get his parents mad at him.

Killua sighed loudly and, not having anything better to do, he just fell flat on his couch and turned the TV on. He started switching fast on the channels, none of them really catching his attention, until he found one a bit more interesting. Many people appeared on the screen, sometimes running, sometimes fighting and sometimes just talking strategies, but it was different to anything Killua had ever seen before, so he kept watching. A few minutes later, the images stopped and now there was an old bald man -except for a funny ponytail and a large moustache-, with ridiculously big ears, talking directly to the viewers.

"Would you like to be like them? Do you think you have what it takes to be a Hunter? If so, come and take your chance at the Hunter exam that will be held tomorrow! The place? You'll have to find it yourself! If you can't, it means you're not suited to be a Hunter. So, come and show us your abilities, we are waiting for you! Take the exam and become a Hunter!"

"Oh?" Killua muttered with a tinge of curiosity and amusement. That was what Killua wanted, something to entertain and prove himself at the same time; a challenge. He didn't care one bit about the ‘becoming a Hunter’ thing, but right now, he was eager to go there and watch for himself if it was really that difficult, maybe even have some fun in the process.

Also, he was lucky, because he knew that Illumi had left the house not long ago, though he didn’t know where he went, but that didn’t matter in that moment. It was the best opportunity he had to leave the mansion. He’d take Alluka with him, but it was impossible for him to see her in that moment, not until next week, what would be way too late, and it really broke his heart to leave her there, completely alone. But once he finished, he would return, find a way to free her from his imprisonment and take her away with him. That was for sure.

So, he decided. He would take that Hunter exam.

And, he had to leave right now. If not, he wouldn't arrive on time to it.

Killua walked through his bedroom, looking for some money and food (which basically meant just his delicious daily amount of chocorobots) to stuff his pockets with, and left the room, casually walking towards the exit of the house, not without taking his skateboard first.

However, he should have known it wasn't going to be that easy.

In the corridor, just before arriving to the big exit doors, he ran into Milluki and his mother.

"Hey, where do you think are you going?!" His brother questioned with his usual never-leaving scowl showing on his face.

"Don't talk to your brother like that! I am sure he is just going to the garden to train a little, right Killu? Come on, Milluki, let's go keep him some company."

"I'm leaving." Calmly announced Killua, and before they could process what they had just heard, he launched forward, his hands already turned into claws with sharp nails and, without hesitation, stabbed his left hand into his brother's huge stomach while he slashed his mother's face with his right hand. Everything passed in less than a second, and the next one, Killua was running through the mansion's gardens, leaving his brother's yells and his mother's cries at his back.

He crossed the mansion's gates and with a huge, genuine grin spreading though his lips, he thought 'I did it!' He then flicked his skateboard in the air and jumped to land a second later on it, continuing his way to the Testing Gate, now riding it.

But, not long after, he found a tall and slim figure blocking his way, long silky hair gracefully falling around his thin waist and dark, expressionless almond-shaped eyes locked on his. Illumi.

Killua stopped his skateboard just in time to not bump into him, mere inches separating them. He clumsily took two steps back and stared at him, with a feigned determined expression on his face, trying to hide the fear that started to grow inside of him. Illumi didn't even blink once, his face remaining still all the time.

"Where are you going, Killu?"

Despite his monotone voice, Killua could hear the hidden threat in his words. But he hadn’t come that far to abandon in the last moment. At least he had to try, even if he was terrified and incapable of taking another step forward. He knew that some day he would have to confront his brother and that was the perfect time. So, he took a deep breath and replied, with what hoped was a confident voice.

"It doesn't matter, I'm leaving. I'll come back in a few days."

"No, you won't, because you are not leaving. Now, go back home."

A new wave of fear invaded him, but he didn’t want to back up.

"D-don't tell me what to do!" He shouted, though it sounded more desperate than aggressive.

"Don't make me repeat it, Killu. You can go by yourself or I can carry you by force. You don't want to take the last option, right? I’ve taught you to never fight anyone stronger than you. I am, and you perfectly know. You understand that, right? Now, turn and go back home, Killu. There is nothing for you outside this mountain."

His tone of voice remained impassive all the time but with each step he took, approaching to him with each sentence he said, Killua felt smaller and smaller under his glare, completely weak and insignificant. He wanted to protest and fight, reluctant to keep following Illumi’s orders, but he just couldn’t. His brother was right. How had he thought he could leave the house under Illumi's constant vigilance? It was impossible, even when he wasn’t supposed to be there.

He was paralyzed under his brother's presence right in front of him, his mind blank and his heart painfully contracting in his chest. He knew he couldn't follow his plan, but he also felt incapable to turn back. His legs didn't respond to him, his muscles had gone stiff, impossible to move even just an inch, and he just kept staring at his brother, now with a glint of panic showing on his deep blue eyes.

Illumi reached even closer, his hand placed wide open in front of him, and just an instant before his fingers could brush his white locks of hair, Killua finally reacted. He jumped back and started running in the opposite direction without looking back, his skateboard completely forgotten.

He returned to the mansion, utterly hopeless. On his way back to his bedroom, he met again his mother and Milluki, and after some compliments and tears of joy from the former, that Killua didn't pay attention to, neither he understood, the latter then forcefully dragged him to a well known room, where only the sound of crashing chains, violent whips on his skin and his brother's evil laugher filled the air during the next three days. But Killua didn't mind. He had long since grown accustomed to it; it already was a part of his life.

When his brother finally got bored of him for not reacting at his tortures at all, he released him, and Killua went directly to his bedroom, just wanting to be left alone and sleep restfully on his comfortable bed after have been three days hanging in chains. But he couldn't jump carelessly on the mattress as he had planned, as many wood pieces and hundreds of splinters, as well as four little wheels, were already spread on it, occupying its entire surface.

It was all that remained from his former skateboard.

Killua sighed, letting a breath he didn’t know he was holding escape from his lips, while his hands curled into fists at his sides. He was really tired of this, of everything.

His life hadn't changed one bit. And wouldn’t do for the next four years, until the encounter with a certain someone, who would finally make it happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!!
> 
> This chapter has just been the prologue of the story, which takes place four years before the rest of the fic. I felt necessary to write it to explain what had changed in comparison to the canon, and I thought it was a good insight of Killua's life, as well. Next chapter will start with the real plot of the story!
> 
> As for the updates, I already have some chapters written, but the story is not even near to be finished, so for the moment I'll try to update at least once a week, but this may change in the future.
> 
> Also, kudos and comments are very appreciated!
> 
> I hope you like it!!


	2. Chapter 2

It was getting late in the afternoon. The wind that had been so calm during the day led to a cool breeze that made the leaves on the trees slightly shake and Killua's hair to inevitably tangle itself in a complete white mess; and the sun was already low on the sky, almost setting behind the hills, bathing with its warm colors the entire place.

Killua closed his eyes and took a deep breath, wanting to make the most of that moment of peace, sitting by the river's shore, surrounded by nature and being miles away from his family. Technically, he should be on his way home after having already accomplished one of his usual jobs, but he didn't want to return yet. He still had a few hours before his family started suspecting and went looking for him, and Killua was determined to enjoy that short period of freedom he was so rarely given.

With a content sigh and a little smile tugging at the corners of his lips, he laid down on the soft grass, his hands placed behind his head. However, almost immediately, he felt a small but sharp wave of pain and removed his right hand from under his hair, holding it up in the air in front of his face, with his palm wide open, showing the injury that had made him flinch a second ago. He had almost forgotten about it.

The truth was that mission hadn't been that easy. Of course, nothing he couldn't handle, but that was the first time he had been injured so badly. As it seemed, his target had been waiting for the attack, and was prepared for it, being protected by ten other men, all of them skilled in combat. That fact didn't stop Killua, since he was way faster and stronger, but being outnumbered by so many he couldn't keep an eye on all of them, all the time- even he had a limit- and therefore, he hadn't seen that knife coming directly to his wrist until it was too late.

The wound wasn't fatal, but it was quite deep and despite all his efforts, blood didn't stop coming from it, so he gave up. His rational part told him that he should get it treated before it got infected and he lost too much blood, but he just didn't want to waste his precious time of freedom in an ordinary hospital or going home before than strictly necessary. So he just ignored it.

He lowered his hand and placed it again on the ground, now at his side, and closed his eyes once again, finally relaxing, with the constant sound of the river flowing at his side filling the air and the pleasant smell of pure nature reaching his nostrils. He wished he could stay there forever.

After some time, Killua heard a low noise that he couldn't quite recognize, but that was enough to catch his attention and make him sit up in an instant, his eyes now open and quickly looking for the source of the sound. It didn't take him long to find it.

A few meters at his left, kneeling next to the river, there was a boy, probably of his age, taking some water in a bottle. He was dressed in fully green attire, and even his hair, black and spiky, standing upright against gravity, had a greenish tinge on its ends. A curious hair style, Killua thought, but it didn't look bad on him.

He was still observing the unknown guy, when he suddenly stood up and turned around, catching Killua staring at him. Killua knew he should say or ask something, but the moment he saw the boy's face and his eyes locked with caramel ones, all his words died in his mouth, leaving him mute and still on his place. Killua had never seen eyes so bright and full of life like those which were looking at him in that moment. Their honey brown color matched perfectly the green of his clothes and tanned skin, and its round shape softened his features to make him look innocent and a bit childlike. Killua had to admit, they were beautiful.

Killua noticed the other boy also staring at him, without moving or saying a word. But in a few seconds, he blinked and slightly shook his head, before a sheepish smile appeared on his face as he said.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to wake you up. You were so peacefully sleeping and I tried to be silent, but I guess I wasn’t enough.”

Killua was surprised. It was true that he wasn’t fully on guard on that moment, but he had a great hearing, and not having noticed his presence until that long meant the boy was nearly as silent as him while walking. And that was much to say. Who was that boy?

“I wasn’t sleeping.” He replied, not knowing what else to say.

“Oh, then that’s great! Now, I don’t feel that bad.” The other added with a wide and honest smile on his lips.

Killua looked at him a little more and then, he just returned to his previous position laying on the ground, assuming the conversation had finished and the tanned boy would leave him as suddenly as he appeared. However, he was proved wrong when the boy spoke again, his voice now much closer than before.

“Woah! You’re injured!” He exclaimed with concern on his face. What was ridiculous, Killua thought, having just met literally a minute ago.

“Yeah, it’s no big deal.”

“What are you talking about?! You are bleeding! You must take care of it!”

“I’ll do when I return home.”

“That would be too late.” He deadpanned, a little frown forming on his face. But it didn’t last long because his expression suddenly changed. “Ah! I think…”

And without adding anything more, the unknown guy kneeled at his side, placing his bag on the floor and looking for something inside of it. Killua couldn’t help but feel curious and strangely, a bit nervous too. People normally tended to avoid him; they never wanted to be on his camp of vision, much less to stay as near to himself as that boy was. He was weird, but that wasn’t necessarily bad, so Killua didn’t say anything and let the other boy continue whatever he was doing.

“Yes, I found them!” and with a triumphant look he took some bandages out of the bag, as well as a bottle of disinfectant.

“You always take that with you?” Killua asked with raised eyebrows, and the other chuckled a little at the question.

“Not always, but last time I was home Mito-san put them on my bag before I left, because she knows I always end up with wounds of some type anywhere I go. The truth is I haven’t used them much, because normally I just prefer to go to a hospital, but I am happy they can be useful to heal you! Now, give me your hand.”

Killua hesitated a little, not used to receiving that kind of treatment, but just a look to those brilliant, honest and excited eyes dispersed all his doubts, so he wordlessly sat up and approached his right hand to the other boy, who took it carefully between his.

The moment their hands touched, Killua felt a tingling sensation spreading through his body. It was like nothing he had ever felt before, but it felt good and was somehow reassuring, a feeling that warmed up his entire body, from the ends of his hair to the tips of his toes. Killua didn’t know if the boy in front of him had also felt it, but judging from the way he held his hand in his for a few seconds more than necessary and how his eyes seemed to grow a bit larger, he supposed he had, too.

The boy in green clothes blinked, focusing again on Killua, and proceeded with his job. First, he cleaned with water the traces of dried blood that covered most of his forearm and part of his hand.

“It doesn’t look good.” The boy noted, mostly to himself.

“Mh.”

“How did you get it?” He asked with curiosity.

“Believe me, it’s best if you don’t know.”

Killua almost expected the other boy to protest and insist he told him about it, but instead, he just replied with a simple and understanding “Okay”, and didn’t say anything more, concentrated as he was on his task.

“Well, I finished with that. Now, I must disinfect the wound. This might hurt a little.” He added with a bit of guilt showing on his face.

“Don’t worry about that. Pain is not a problem.” Killua replied, with a more somber voice than he had intended to.

“Oh… okay then. Anyway, I’ll try to make it the less painful as possible.” He assured with a little smile.

And so, the tanned boy started cleaning the wound with slow and smooth movements, always careful not to apply too much pressure. It still stung a little, but Killua really appreciated the other’s intent on minimizing the pain, since all his life had been just the other way round, exposing him to the most painful situations. Those fingers seemed to caress him like no one had ever done before, except maybe his sister, and Killua wondered how a stranger he had just met could treat him with so much care, and how he himself could feel so at ease with it.

When the boy finished, the wound had a much better aspect, and the moment he retired his fingers, Killua’s hand felt immediately cold, almost missing the other’s contact. But it wasn’t gone for long, and before he knew it, it was wrapping bandages around his wrist, covering his wound with them. And again, the boy tried to be as delicate as possible, doing his job slowly and carefully, always with a little grin on his lips.

“Alright, it’s finished!”

Killua stayed silent for a moment, looking at his new bandaged wrist, and then, with a small but genuine smile, he muttered.

“Thank you.”

The words felt foreign to his mouth and he realized he had hardly pronounced those two simple words in all his life. But right now, he truly meant it, and it felt so right to say them out loud.

“No problem! I am happy that I could help.” The other replied, his grin growing wider on his lips. “By the way, I’m Gon, Gon Freecs! What’s your name?”

“I’m Killua, Killua-“ He stopped, thinking it wasn’t good idea to let his famous surname out. He didn’t want the boy to start treating him differently because of that and he didn’t want him to go yet, either. “Just Killua.”

If the other sensed something strange on that reply, he didn’t show it.

“Nice to meet you, Killua! Do you mind if I set up my camp here?”

‘Not at all’ Killua thought. It was the first, and probably last time he got to spend some time with someone his age, and what’s more, that someone seemed to enjoy his company. Of course he wanted him to stay. But for some reason, he couldn’t say it aloud. Instead, he just nodded.

Gon’s face lit up and he excitedly jumped up and started preparing everything while Killua just stayed on the ground, watching as a little smile started tugging at his lips. That boy had really made his day and just his mere presence made Killua cheer up.

Maybe, just maybe, Gon could become his friend. His first and only friend.

Killua would really like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to clarify, this happens four years after the prologue, so Gon and Killua are both 16 in this story.
> 
> Thanks for reading ^^


	3. Chapter 3

It didn’t take too much time for Gon to make his camp ready, since he had grown fast at it with experience, and by now his hands almost worked on their own, without thinking at all. Or maybe, he should say _their_ camp.

At first, the pale boy had refused his offer, saying something about needing to get home early, but Gon insisted and insisted until Killua had finally, reluctantly, agreed to spend the night. But Gon knew the other boy wouldn’t have accepted unless he wanted it too, as the little smile that appeared on his lips and he tried to hide, to no avail, also demonstrated.

Gon knew he was being selfish, but he couldn’t help it; he just wanted to spend more time with that mysterious white haired boy, get to know him and of course, become his friend. He had wanted that since the first moment he saw him, calmly laying on the ground, seemingly sleeping, though he then learnt that he wasn’t. In that moment, he stayed a while staring at Killua; he just couldn’t manage to tore his eyes away from him.

His pale skin seemed so delicate and was so perfect that it looked like porcelain, while his utterly white hair seemed to be so soft that Gon was tempted to run his fingers through it. He wondered what color his eyes were, probably something light, matching his whole appearance, but Gon was sure the sight of that boy with his eyes open would make him look ten times more beautiful. And, a few minutes later, he was proved right, when he turned around and surprised Killua wide awake, already looking at him; and Gon paralyzed for a moment under that intense glare of pure blue, like two sapphires standing out in the snow.

Night had already fallen and both boys were sitting around the bonfire they had made, Gon cooking two fish he had caught from the river at their side with his fishing rod, and Killua just waiting in silence for dinner to be ready, his gaze constantly shifting between the crackling flames and the boy next to him. Gon didn’t miss that, but said nothing, since he was practically doing the same, sneaking glances at the other when he wasn’t looking. He didn’t know why, but his presence made Gon so happy, and couldn’t help a little smile to tug at his lips.

“Killua, here.” Gon said as he offered Killua one of the fish, now ready to eat.

Killua just extended his arm and silently took the fish given to him. He didn’t thank him this time, but Gon didn’t mind, he wasn’t waiting for it, anyways. Instead, something else caught his attention. When the pale boy had reached forward and raised his uninjured arm to take the food, the hem of his long sleeve slid a little, revealing the skin of his wrist and what seemed like a tattoo printed on it.

“Wow, you have a really cool tattoo in there! Can I see it better?”

“Huh? What are you talking about? I don’t have any tattoos.” Killua replied, looking confused.

“Yes, you have! I’ve seen it on your wrist, but I just caught a glimpse of it.” Gon insisted, knowing he wasn’t imagining things.

“I tell you, I’ve never-“ He cut down when he shifted his gaze to his left wrist. Gon approached a little and discovered the picture of a flame seeming to have been drawn with ink on Killua’s pale skin.

“See? I was right. It’s a pretty cool tattoo, I like it.”

“This isn’t a tattoo, Gon.” Killua muttered, frowning, his eyes still focused on his skin. “This mark has just appeared on my wrist. It’s the first time I see it.”

“How can it be possible?”

“Do you have any tattoos or marks like this?” Suddenly asked Killua.

“No, I haven’t.” Gon slowly answered, not knowing the meaning of the question.

“Well, that’s not true. When you were bandaging my hand I saw some kind of drawing on your right wrist. I guess is the same that has happened to me.”

“What?!” Gon immediately rolled up the sleeve of his green jacket to reveal the supposed mark. His eyes widened at the sight of a lightning drawing printed on the inside of his wrist, where that morning had only been clean tanned skin.

“What is this?” Gon questioned, after having well inspected his own mark.

“I have no idea.” Killua deadpanned, shrugging.

“Well, isn’t it strange that both of us now have these marks on the same place and that we realized at the same moment? Oh, maybe they appeared because we met!” Gon exclaimed happily, liking the idea.

“Don’t be stupid, we both have met other people and we didn’t have marks appear on our skin because of that.” Killua tried to reason.

“Well, maybe it doesn’t happen with anyone, just with the two of us. Maybe it’s a sign that we are special to each other.”

“D-don’t say dumb things! Besides, I’ve never heard that kind of thing to have ever happened before.”

“But that doesn’t mean it can’t be true.” Gon pointed out.

Killua’s cheeks tainted slightly red, and Gon thought he looked cute like that. The pale boy turned his head in embarrassment, hiding his face from his companion, before concluding.

“Whatever you say. There is no point in discussing this, anyway, since we can’t know the answer.”

“That’s true.” Gon agreed with a simple nod of his head.

Nothing more was said and they just continued with their nearly forgotten dinner.

Once they finished, Gon couldn’t stand the silence anymore and started talking again, about everything and anything. He told Killua about the adventures he had since becoming a Hunter, the friends he met along the way, how he was still looking for his disappeared father, and how had been his life before all that, with Mito-san at Whale Island. Killua listened patiently and with interest at whatever he told him, sometimes even making comments or asking something else that had caught his attention.

Other times, Gon asked Killua about himself, but the white haired boy wasn’t as a good talker as a listener. He didn’t answer most of his questions and when he did, he just replied with a short sentence and never saying too much. However, Gon managed to learn quite a few things about the other, like they were the same age and that he had a big family, though they weren’t exactly good people and hadn’t treated him well.

That last part Killua hadn’t exactly told him, but he could easily deduce it from the other’s expression and choice of words. A sudden wave of rage, mixed with sadness, invaded him. He had met Killua just a couple of hours ago, but one thing he was certain was that Killua deserved to have a family who loved him, just the way Mito-san loved Gon, and not a family who just conveniently used him for their own interest, as it seemed to be. But then, Killua’s expression changed when he started talking about his little sister, who contrary to the rest of his family members, he seemed to love so much.

When he was talking about her, Killua’s face lit up with happiness, and the sight made Gon so happy that he forgot about everything else he wanted to ask him and just focused on talking about his sister.

“And there was this time when she made me piggyback her during a whole day. Wherever she wanted to go, I had to carry her there, and she even threatened me with not talking to me again if I didn’t do it. She can be very dramatic sometimes. But of course, I did it. It was fun at first, but I remember to end the day with a terrible backache that lasted for three days.”

“Hahaha, I would have loved to see that! You two seem so close. I kind of envy you, I’d like to have a sibling too.”

“Yeah, at least I get along with her, because the relationship with the rest of my brothers goes from awful to terrible. But I don’t care about the rest; Alluka is the only one that matters.”

“I see. I’d love to meet her someday!”

Killua didn’t answer immediately. He looked surprised at first, and then his expression changed to a sad and kind of nostalgic one.

“I’m sure you two would perfectly get along. You remind me a bit of her.”

Gon grinned widely at the comment, hoping to make Killua feel better, and kept the conversation going until he couldn’t think of anything more to ask.

When silence finally fell onto them, they realized how late it was. Gon extinguished the bonfire and both of them laid down on the ground, ready to go to sleep. But none of them closed their eyes yet, instead they just laid on their backs, side by side, staring at the night sky above their heads, in silence. At least, until Gon voiced out his thoughts for Killua to hear them.

“I like it. The mark. This way I’ll always remember you when I look at it.” He said with his typical cheerful voice, raising his hand and looking at the mark on his wrist for what felt like the thousand time in the night. They hadn’t brought up the topic since their discovery, and Gon felt necessary to say those words aloud in that moment.

“W-why would you like that?” Killua asked, a bit embarrassed, but mostly just confused.

“Eh? Because we are friends!” Gon stated without a single doubt.

“Are we?” The pale boy questioned, hesitant, but Gon could hear hope and happiness hidden on his words.

“Of course!” Gon assured him, rolling on his side, now looking directly at his new friend. And he knew he would repeat it as many times as it was necessary for the other to believe it. Then, a sudden thought crossed his mind, and he asked, in a lower voice, tainted with a trace of sadness. “Or maybe, you don’t want to?”

“Of course I want, idiot.” But the insult didn’t sound as such, as the whole sentence was said in a whisper, his voice incredibly soft and his ocean like eyes staring at his. Gon felt his cheeks warming a little, for some reason he didn’t understand. “I’m happy that we can be friends.” Killua added with a little smile on his lips and his eyes shining bright.

“Me too.”

And as to prove it, he took Killua’s left hand with his right one, and held them on the ground, in the space between them, before closing his eyes and drifting to sleep. At first, he felt Killua tense a little, but he didn’t remove his hand. It wasn’t after a few moments that he finally fully accepted it, when he gave Gon’s hand a light squeeze as he closed his eyes, as well.

And both, with their marked wrists touching and their palms holding against each other, succumbed to slumber with a grin playing at their lips.


	4. Chapter 4

Killua woke up before dawn; just when the sky started to change its color from pitch black to something lighter, with a few hues of orange and yellow on it. He had slept better than he had in months, and the last thing he wanted to do was to get up from the ground and return home. But that was exactly what he had to do.

He was about to stand up when he realized that he was still holding hands with Gon, their palms locked in a firm grip, as if the other didn't want to let him go. He couldn't help but both smile and blush a little. He didn't want to, either. He remembered last night, everything that happened, and especially how Gon had so honestly and openly stated that they were friends. Gon was his first friend and he couldn't have wished for anything better. And that was why he didn't want to move at all.

Killua simply didn't want to walk away from the boy still sleeping next to him. Last night had been the best he’d ever had in years, just because of Gon. He maintained the distance at first, not used to rely on new people so easily, but as time passed he became more and more at ease in Gon’s presence, to the point of truly enjoying his company and being confident enough to have an animated conversation with him. It had been perfect. Killua wanted to stay at his side a bit longer, talk to him a bit longer, hold his hand a bit longer. But he knew he couldn't, and his heart ached with a pain he had never experienced before.

So slowly, reluctantly, he sat up and then stood up on his feet, just carefully dropping Gon's hand when it was impossible to keep holding it anymore. He kept looking down at him for a few moments more, before finally turning around and silently leaving their camp, heading towards his house. He knew if he had looked for a second longer he wouldn't have been able to do it; his muscles would have gone stiff and refused to move, and he would probably have laid back on the ground again, taking Gon's warm hand again in his. And even so, it had required all his willpower to turn his back to his new friend, and each step he took, separating them more and more, and approaching his house and terrible family felt like a dagger sticking at his heart.

Once he woke up, Gon would probably be sad when he realized that he had left him, but Killua knew this was the only way. He was so happy that Gon had named him his friend, but it was impossible for the two of them to stay in contact. That was why he had to leave before they got too close, even if that was the total opposite of what he wanted, or otherwise he wouldn’t be able do it and it would just make both of them to suffer more than it already did.

But he remembered what Gon said last night. It might be absurd, and a complete nonsense, but he was right. Killua looked at his left wrist, and the mark printed on it. He had to abandon Gon, probably for good, but now, with the flame drawing on his skin it was as if he would always carry his friend with him. The truth was that flame mark reminded him of Gon, somehow, as a way to make sure he would never forget him. And he wouldn't.

After convincing himself that he had made the right decision, if not the one he preferred, he stopped thinking about it and activated his Godspeed. Killua started running through the forest, faster than lighting, feeling the electricity involving his whole body and running though his veins. It was a great sensation; he felt capable of everything and it helped to empty his mind.

In less than an hour, he had covered dozens of miles and before he knew it, he had already arrived to the Testing Gate, at the base of Kukuro Mountain. He pushed the doors and, without effort, he managed to open up to the fifth gate. If he had tried harder he would surely have opened the sixth and maybe the seventh door too, but he was tired from the long run and definitely not in the mood to strive more than strictly necessary.

After saluting Mike with a friendly pat on his head, Killua went directly towards the mansion, wanting to finish his job as soon as possible. He walked through countless corridors to reach the desired room. He knocked twice and entered before hearing an answer; not that he would get it, anyways.

The first thing he saw was complete darkness, but in a few seconds his eyes grew accustomed to the lack of light, or rather, to the blue dim light that bathed the room. In the wide couch located on the center of the room was sat his father, already waiting for him, as he always did after he was sent on a mission. Killua wordlessly approached him, until being right in front of him.

"You're late, Killua. I was about to send your brother to find you." Silva said, not angry but not quite happy either, just as if he was stating a fact.

"I know, I'm sorry, father. There were a few complications in the job."

"Tell me everything that happened."

And so, Killua proceeded to explain all the details of his mission. His father just listened patiently and didn't say anything until his son finished.

"The job was successfully done. However, fighting against ten other people shouldn't be a problem for you. That only means you need more practice and training. As the next heir of the family business, you must always do a clean job, regarding both you and the victim. You must not be injured the next time."

"Yes, father." Killua obediently replied. It was always the same when he returned from a mission. His father briefly congratulated him and ordered him to train harder, never forgetting to remind him his future as the family heir. Killua was bored of it, he just wanted to leave the room and be left alone.

"Now, tell me who bandaged your wrist."

'Dammit!' Killua thought. He had been careful to maintain both of his wrists, the one injured and the one with the mark, out of his father's sight, since he really didn't want to talk about Gon to him. And although he hadn't noticed his new mark, he had surely seen his bandaged arm, quite difficult to hide. Well, he had already thought of an excuse for it.

"My wound didn't stop bleeding, so I had to stop at a hospital to have it treated. That's also part of the reason why I returned later than expected."

His father looked skeptical, but didn't argue. He stared at Killua’s eyes with that cold glare of his and then, he finally dismissed him with a gesture of his hand.

Killua headed to his room, and once there, he plumped on his bed, face first. He just wanted to lay there and do nothing. He still felt miserable for leaving Gon behind without him even knowing. He was sure he had made the right decision, but then, why did it hurt so much? It didn't make any sense. He had just known the other boy for a few hours, and yet, Gon had managed to surpass the barriers of his heart.

Gon, his first friend. He still couldn't believe it.

As a sad smile appeared at the corners of his lips, Killua closed his eyes and just waited for sleep to come.

~

He woke up a few hours later, when the sun was high in the sky and its intense light bathed every corner of the bedroom. Killua rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands and put his messy bangs away from his face. It was then, while brushing his hair with his fingers, that he sensed the touch of something thin and sharp that should be there, at least not since his return. With all that had happened he had forgotten about the needle. Killua stretched himself on the mattress, just like a cat, before tiredly getting up and going to his brother's bedroom.

Just before he knocked on his door, he heard.

"Come in, Killu."

Any other person would have been surprised, confused at least, at the person inside the room saying their name before opening the door, but for Killua that wasn't anything new, since Illumi did it every time he returned from a mission.

Killua unceremoniously opened the door and headed directly towards his brother, who was meditating and practicing his Ten sitting cross-legged on his bed. Killua stopped right in front of him, pointed at his nape and blurted.

"Take it out."

With a gesture of his hand, he indicated Killua to turn around, and without a word, Killua did so. A second later, he felt Illumi's long fingers brushing his hair, looking for the needle he had stuck on his nape a few days ago. Since the day Killua had tried to escape to take the Hunter exam, his brother had increased his vigilance on him even more, going to the extent of planting some of his needles on him. They had made a deal; every time Killua had to leave the mansion, for a mission or any other approved reason, he would need to have one of Illumi's needles stuck on his brain, which could only be removed by his brother once he had come back. That way, Killua was more controlled, but at least he could longer a bit his missions, and sometimes, even go out without having one. So he agreed.

Illumi's fingers ran cold and careless through his hair, until finding the needle and pulling it out in a fast and painful move. Killua bit his tongue to avoid any sound escaping his mouth; he wasn't going to give him what he wanted. He remembered Gon's soft and careful touches from the day before, while healing his wound, and couldn't help to compare it with the rashness and insensitivity of his brother in that moment, in one single movement.

Once Illumi's touch disappeared from his head, Killua's hand flied to his nape, his fingers rubbing at the place where the needle had been a second ago. It had hurt more than the previous times. His brother surely had made it on purpose.

In that moment, long cold fingers circled around his wrist, taking him by surprise, and made him turn around until he was facing Illumi again. Killua was confused for that sudden movement, until he noticed his brother's gaze locked on his wrist. He looked down, already knowing the reason of Illumi's stare. His brother's firm grip on his arm made his mysterious flame mark on his wrist to be totally exposed.

Killua tried to retract his arm and hide the mark again, as if nothing had happened, but Illumi held him tight and didn't let go.

"Just as I thought." Illumi muttered.

What? Did his brother know anything about that mark that had appeared so suddenly on his skin? It couldn't be, right? But what if he did? He had to know.

"What are you talking about? Do you know anything about this?"

"Oh, I know everything about this mark of yours." Illumi bluntly answered, his eyes not leaving the mark.

"What is it? Why did it appear?"

"Well, personally I think is best if you don't know, but if you tell me when it appeared and under what circumstances, I promise to tell you everything I know. After all, now that you are already involved, it's only fair for you to know."

What was all that about? Was it some kind of secret? That reply had only helped to make Killua more curious about it than he already was. He could finally get the answer for that mystery. But, was it really worth it? To get the answer, he would have to tell the truth, what also meant, talking about Gon. Somehow, he didn't want to. He wanted that memory to be only his, he didn't want to share it with anyone, much less with his manipulative brother.

But he needed to know. As far as he knew, this could also concern Gon, since a mark had also appeared on him. He felt it was something important, for both of them. So, swallowing all his pride and insecurities, he started telling everything from yesterday. Well, not everything. He omitted some parts, like the long conversation they had around the bonfire after dinner, or how they fell asleep holding hands. That was something private, and that Illumi didn't really have to know. But still, he told him much more than he wanted.

Illumi listened silently, with his usual expressionless eyes staring at his own. When he finished, his brother finally opened his mouth, but the words that escaped from it weren't what Killua had been expecting at all.

"Well, Killu. It's time you know about the Zoldyck curse. And once you get to know it, you'll understand why you'll have to kill that boy as soon as possible."


	5. Chapter 5

Killua froze in his place as his eyes grew incredibly large and his heart thumped violently in his chest. 'What was his brother talking about? A family curse? It couldn't be true, he had never heard about that. And what was all that about killing Gon?!'

No matter what Illumi told him, he was never going to do something like that. He was an assassin - against his will, but he still was-, and he had killed all kinds of people, but he just couldn't imagine himself taking Gon's life out of him. That was completely wrong and the total opposite of what he wanted. Gon was the liveliest person he had ever met, and Killua didn't want that to change. If he was sure of something was that he would never kill his first and only friend. He couldn’t, after all Gon had made for him and all he meant for Killua.

His shock must have been apparent on his expression, but Illumi ignored it and started his talk, before Killua had the chance to say anything.

"As I said, there is a curse surrounding our family, a curse that could be fatal if not ripped from the very beginning. It all started many generations ago, with the first Zoldyck that became an assassin, and the one that founded the business we still carry out today. He was the greatest assassin of his time, probably even better than father and grandpa. He always took the hardest jobs, missions that would be impossible to do even for me, and always ended up victorious. However, one day, everything changed. He was poisoned and went ill very badly. The doctors from the house couldn't do anything to save him, so instead he hired the best doctor on the country. She came and healed him, as expected, but something else happened. They started spending more time together than necessary for his medical check-outs and one day, they both mysteriously disappeared. They were found a couple of days later by one of his sons, both dead, in a village not far from there. And their corpses showed two similar marks on their wrists that no one else could remember either of them had before."

So Gon had been right after all, Killua thought. That mark of his had appeared because of his meeting with the tanned boy.

"So, that is the secret behind the marks. It’s nothing but a fatal curse within our family. It shows up when you meet and touch a certain person. Throughout the years some people have call them ‘soulmates’ but it was quickly changed to the term 'deathmates' since they would only make you lose your focus, triggering a mess of feelings and emotions on yourself that will only lead you to a certain death. They can seem special when you meet them and you might want to spend all your time with them, but in the end, it would just be your downfall. It took some time for our ancestors to understand this, but now we are well aware of it. That is why you must end the problem from the very start. Once you have met your ‘deathmate’, you must kill them right away, before the curse has time to even start, before the other person can even notice what is happening. The mark is a sign to know who is going to complicate things and so you can get rid of them before it happens, so in the end, the curse can really be helpful if you take care of it in the right moment. That is how we have survived all these years and your case is no different. You must kill that boy before the curse gets too deep in you. You don't want to end like our poor ancestor, right Killu?"

His brain was working so fast it felt about to explode. Somehow, what his brother said made a bit of sense, even if he didn't want to admit it. That explained a few things, like the meaning behind the marks and the strange connection he had felt with Gon; but also other things that had been there for longer and that he had always wondered, like the reason why he wasn't allowed to have friends and the almost unbearable constant vigilance on him.

It also was understandable why, now more than ever, Gon and Killua couldn't stay together or even see each other once again; it would just be the death of them, as Illumi said. But, that was the point. Was everything that his brother had told him totally true, or was it mixed with lies? Knowing his manipulative nature, Killua wouldn't be surprised to find out it was the latter. But one thing was sure. Despite all his brother had told him, he wasn't going to kill Gon. There had to be another way. Or maybe it was everything a lie, and then he wouldn't have to worry.

He had to make sure.

He made his best to remain calm and not show the agitation inside him.

"What about you and the rest of us? Have you experienced the curse? And father? Grandpa, too?"

"As you should know, mother is not father's ‘deathmate’; they married because both are great and famous assassins. He had one before, though, but grandpa killed her as soon as he knew of her existence. I don't know about grandpa, never asked. As for my case, yes, I met my ‘deathmate’ some years ago. I could feel the curse working the moment our arms brushed and it took me less than a second to kill him right there. In any other circumstances, it would have been a tougher task, because he seemed very strong, but in that moment he was so confused that he let his guard down for the tiniest moment. However, I will always have this with me."

With a fluid move he lifted his right arm and showed Killua the inside of his wrist, normally hidden under a wide bracelet, and he looked at the mark printed on it. In his brother's case, it was the picture of a joker card. It was strange to see that peculiar mark on his brother's pale skin and know it had been there for years, without Killua knowing. Illumi quickly covered the mark again under the bracelet and resumed his explanation as if nothing had happened.

"About our brothers, they haven’t met their ‘deathmate’, nor do they know of their existence. As the older brother, I was the only one with that information. Milluki never leaves the house, always locked on his virtual world and Kalluto and 'it' are too young for tha-"

Killua immediately forgot about the topic they were talking about and could feel the rage growing on him at hearing one specific detail on Illumi's speech.

"Alluka is not an ‘it’! I'm tired of you treating her like an object. At least call her by her name!" Killua shouted, unable to contain the fury that always grew on his chest whenever someone insulted his beloved sister.

"That little brother of ours shouldn't exist at all, his mere presence is hideous. That's why we don't bother to call him by his name. He shouldn't have one, at all."

Killua's hands turned into fists at his sides trying to contain his anger, his knuckles going white with all the strength he used. It was always the same when Alluka was mentioned in his family and he was sick and tired of it. She was a wonderful girl, because that was what she was, a _girl_. It wasn’t a matter of the body she had, but of how she felt with herself. And if she said she was a girl, there was nothing to argue about. But it seemed no one else could understand something as simple as that and it always got to Killua's nerves. Alluka didn't deserve all that hatred and incomprehension from her own family.

"Don't ever say that again." Killua hissed, his eyes hiding behind his bangs and his voice menacing. "Alluka is a girl. She is a great girl and of course she deserves to exist and have a name. Don't even suggest the contrary ever again." Now, he lifted his gaze and locked his deathly stare on Illumi's eyes.

His brother didn't flinch or move at all. His expression was as calm and death as always.

Enraged as he was and with nothing more to say or ask, he turned away to exit the room and leave Illumi, not wanting to stay in his presence for a second longer. But it seemed that his brother hadn't finished talking.

"I hope you have understood what I told you, Killu. You must go and kill that boy right now." Killua stopped on his tracks, but didn’t turn to look at him.

"I'm not killing Gon." The words left his mouth without a trace of doubt, that clear the thought was in his mind.

"Gon... So that's his name, huh?" Killua mentally cursed himself. He had been so careful not to let out his name before, not to give Illumi any hints for him to find Gon. But it was too late, he hadn't been thinking in that moment. "Well, after having spent a whole night together, I guess it's already too late; the curse has already started. There is no other way; I'll have to kill him myself."

Killua’s heart skipped a beat and the calm façade that had managed to maintain since entering the room began to shatter. He started to panic. He turned around and faced his brother once again.

"Don't do it! There is no need to, I'm not going to see him again!" He pleaded, trying to convince him, to no avail, and Killua knew it, but he had to try because that was the only thing he could do in that moment.

"You can't assure that." Illumi deadpanned. "Don't worry Killu, this is for your own good. It will be over before you notice and then everything will be back to normal. Believe me."

Something inside Killua wanted to believe him, to accept everything his brother said and let him end with the problem. It was all too troublesome. He felt something soothing his heart and bottling his senses. His mouth opened and was about to agree with him when his gaze somehow fell to the flame mark on his left wrist and something clicked in his head. He remembered everything. He remembered Gon.

That wasn't him, he realized, it must have been one of his brother's dirty tricks. He shook his head to clear his thoughts until he could think properly again. Gon was his friend; he truly cared about him and wasn't going to let him die. He wouldn't permit it.

"No, you won't kill Gon. I won't allow it." Killua replied with determination.

Illumi seemed a bit surprised, but he shrugged his shoulders and said.

"Your opinion does not mind in this matter. I'll kill him with or without your permission. It would have been easier if you agreed with me, but now all I have to do is give the order to maintain you locked in the house until I return. You can't stop me, Killu. You never could and you’ll never can. I'm leaving right now." And with that, he left the room, leaving a frozen Killua in there.

Illumi was right, he thought, his heart painfully clenching in his chest. His brother was way stronger than him, he had always been. Illumi always got what he wanted and nobody could stop him, not even Killua. He had tried. There had been moments in which he had been brave enough to confront his manipulative brother, like the day he tried to go take the Hunter exam, but he always failed. It had been proven impossible to escape from his control.

Illumi was gone, but he was now trapped in the mansion, unable to go out; his brother would have made sure of that. There was no point in trying to escape. He couldn’t do anything to save Gon. He may be a deathly machine while on missions, but he really was weak and useless when it really mattered.

His knees shook under his weight and folded against his will, making Killua helplessly fall on the floor. He felt utterly impotent in that situation. He felt a hard stinging in the back of his eyes, so unknown to him. He wanted to cry. He couldn’t remember the last time he cried. But he resisted the tears and his eyes remained dry. Crying wouldn’t solve anything. His reason told him there was no way to save Gon, but his heart didn’t want to give up.

He tried to think of a plan, but nothing came to his mind. After what seemed like hours of thinking, he stopped for a moment and decided to make Alluka a visit. It felt like he hadn’t seen her in years, but it had been barely a week. Maybe after talking to her, Killua would feel a bit better. Maybe she could inspire him in some way.

Or maybe, she was the solution to everything.

Killua thought of his situation, of Gon and Alluka, and an idea finally started to form in his head. A hopeful smile crossed his face.

If everything went well, more than one person could be saved.


	6. Chapter 6

When Gon woke up that morning, with the sunbeams bathing his tanned skin, the first thing he noticed was the coldness of his hand and the feeling of something missing in it. He had never got up with that sensation before.

He slowly opened his eyes, adjusting his sight to the brightness of the sun in the clear sky. He found himself laying on the grass, alone, his right hand extended a bit further as if it had been holding something, but now only the air brushed his fingers. Still sleepy, he stared with tired eyes at the lightning drawn on his wrist for a second, which turned into two, and then three. And it was in that moment that all the memories from the previous day invaded him, like a big wave in a calm sea.

Killua.

The name instantly came to his mind, taking Gon out of his sleepy state in less than a second and making him to sit up and look around for the boy in question. He didn't find him.

Gon let out a heavy sigh and his shoulders came a bit down. He knew this would happen but didn't want to believe it, and now reality came to him with double force. Killua was gone, and he was alone, again.

He would have liked to stay with him longer, but he understood Killua had other things to do and other places to be. They couldn't travel together, though that would have been wonderful. At least, he would have liked to have said goodbye, but the white haired boy had left him in the middle of night, without letting Gon know.

Gon sighed again and stood up, getting ready to start the day. He was still sad about having lost his new friend but he couldn't sink in his sorrow. He had to move on. Gon also had things to do.

He remembered the purpose of his journey. He was on his way to Yorknew, where he was going to meet with Leorio and Kurapika after not seeing them for almost three years. Time really passed fast. He was so excited to meet his friends again after so long.

The memories of his two companions during the Hunter exam cheered him up a little and encouraged him to restart his way to the big city with renewed forces.

Gon had been traveling for a few days, but if he kept a good pace he could reach the city before sunset. He could have arrived earlier if he had taken a dirigible or a train, but he had left Whale Island with just enough money for the ship travel and a bit of food, so instead he had to walk there. However, the lack of money wasn't a problem. He was used to traveling through the forest, hunting his own food and walking for days. It had been that way during all of his adventures with Kaito for the last two years.

After becoming a Hunter at the age of 12, his life had been made of lots of adventures and traveling around the world, everything with just one single objective in mind: finding his father. The truth was he hadn't made many advances and was still far from meeting Ging, but everything he had lived in the process and had lead him to that moment was incredible and wouldn't change it for anything in the world.

Gon had experienced lots of adventures and had gotten way stronger than he was before the Hunter exam. And in the meantime, he had met incredible people and made precious friends: Kurapika and Leorio in the Hunter exam, Zushi and Wing in Heavens Arena, before the Phantom Troupe incident at Yorknew, Bisky at Greed Island and Kaito after that, when he thought he was finally going to meet his father but instead, he was introduced to his pupil. But he wasn't disappointed. Instead, he took that opportunity to travel alongside the man in the longest trip he had ever taken.

They traveled a lot, from country to country, through forests, deserts and oceans. Gon helped Kaito in his investigation work about unknown species, and in return, Kaito helped Gon with his training, improving the details of his Nen that Wing and Bisky couldn't, for both the lack of time and Gon's lower ability in that moment.

It had been a great experience, but after two years, Gon considered it was time to take a little break. So, he returned home, and after so many years, he reencountered with Mito-san, the person he considered as a mom. He hadn't realized how much he had missed her until he was embracing her again. It had passed so much time. She was shorter, or rather, he second thought, he was taller, but Mito-san was still the same kind and loving woman and Gon was still the same energetic and smiley boy. Nothing had changed.

And so, his days as a kid returned to his life, for a month, and then two. He went fishing to the lake, he played with the animals in the forest and he helped Mito-san with the cooking and the household. It was a simple life. But Gon wasn't made for that. He was made for living adventures, so eventually; his time at his home place came to an end. He still wasn't sure what he was going to do next, but he knew it was time to leave.

As a start, he decided to meet with Leorio and Kurapika, after so long without seeing each other. They agreed to meet in Yorknew in a week's time. It was then that Gon realized he had run out of money, and so decided what his next task would be: entering Heavens Arena once again to gain some money while fighting strong opponents to recover all his lost strength during his time at Whale Island.

And so, he left Mito-san and his home, always with the promise of coming back. He took a ship, and once in the continent, started his walk to Yorknew. What he didn't expect was to meet a certain boy that would completely captivate him. He had never felt so attached to anyone before. He had made many friends, but it never hurt whenever they had to go separate ways. It was a bit sad maybe, but never hurt. In Killua's case, it did, even after just knowing each other for less than a day.

He tried, but it was hard not to think about him. Killua was interesting, mysterious and beautiful. Gon had never met someone like him. He had been a bit distant at the beginning, but by the end of the night they were laughing together like lifelong friends next to the bonfire and went to sleep hand in hand, without any other thought on his mind than the other's presence right next to him.

But then, everything had dissipated with the start of the new day; and the only reason why he was certain it hadn't all been just a wonderful dream was the mark on his wrist. That lightning mark on his skin was the reminder that everything had been real and not just an illusion. Gon thought the lightning had been the perfect choice to describe Killua. He didn't know him much, but it fitted him somehow. He loved it.

He wasn't going to let despair get through him, and with a new smile on his lips, he fastened his pace, getting closer to his destination with each new step.

\--

He arrived at Yorknew just in time for the meeting. Leorio, Kurapika and him had decided to meet at Dayroad Park, just like the previous time, and by the time he got there, he could see his two friends already waiting for him. Gon rushed at their encounter as he shouted the others’ names to catch their attention. They turned around and genuine grins showed on both faces, Leorio's more enthusiastic while Kurapika's more nostalgic.

"Gon! Finally. We've been waiting an hour for you to come!" Leorio said, but didn't sound annoyed at all. Instead he threw his arms at the tanned boy and trapped him in a bear hug. Gon's chuckle sounded muffled against Leorio's chest.

"It’s been a longtime. It's so good to see you!"

"You have no idea." Leorio answered in a soft voice.

Gon reluctantly ended the embrace and focused on his other friend, who had been silent until then.

"I'm glad to see you, Gon. You've grown so much." Kurapika mentioned, as they were now almost the same height, but Gon still being one or two inches shorter than the other.

"Kurapika!" Gon just shouted his name and surprised the blond taking him into a tight hug. After the initial surprise, a soft smile appeared on Kurapika's features and quickly responded to the embrace, gently placing his arms around Gon's middle.

They separated and the three of them kept looking silently at each other for a moment.

"Well, we have a lot to talk about. How about we go to our house and talk calmly in there?" Leorio proposed.

"Yeah, that sounds perfect! Wait... You said _your_ house? You two live together, then?" Gon asked with curiosity. He knew both of them lived in Yorknew, but they hadn't told him they were sharing a house. That was new for him.

"Yeah, that's right." Kurapika confirmed. "In fact, we were waiting to meet you again to tell you that and one other thing."

"What is it?" Gon asked, excited.

"Well, this might surprise you a little, but Kurapika and I are-"

"GON!"

Someone in the crowd cried his name. Leorio shut up and both Kurapika and him looked at the people around them with a confused expression. They didn't recognize the voice. But Gon did. He couldn't forget that voice, and his heart skipped a beat on his chest, because he had thought he would never hear it again.

However, something on its tone wasn't right. It wasn't calm and confident as yesterday, but rather rushed and agitated. Gon turned around, and found the boy in front of him, just a few meters separating them. He looked exhausted. His hair was a complete mess and electricity sparkles were coming out of his skin, but he didn't seem to notice. And on his back, he was carrying a sleeping girl. Gon wondered if she was his sister, probably yes. His eyes flew to meet with the boy’s ones, and for a moment he lost himself in the depths of that intense blue. But the worried look on them snapped Gon out of his stupor and he came back to reality.

He hadn't imagined their reencounter- if they ever saw each other again - go like that. Not filled with all that agitation and concern.

Gon's lips could only form one single word.

"Killua."


	7. Chapter 7

Killua waited a little before visiting Alluka. Illumi had just left and he didn't want to look suspicious by immediately going to see her. He had to be very careful not to give any hints about the plan he had in mind. This time, if he did it right, Killua was positive it could work.

Thus, almost an hour after Illumi's departure, not so long that he had enough time to have already found Gon, but not so soon to make anyone suspect about his true intentions, he walked through the corridors that would lead him to Alluka's chamber. His father accompanied him, since he was the only one in his family with access to that part of the house. He had a little frown on his face, but Killua didn't worry about that; it was the same every time he wanted to see his little sister.

Killua crossed the last security gate and separated from his father, who never went further from that point. He had been a bit worried that he wanted to come in with him, in place of Illumi, who always did it but who wasn't there in that moment. But as it seemed, his father had no intentions to guard him from the inside of the room. ‘Thank God’, he thought immediately relieved; otherwise it would just complicate his plan. But Killua wasn't so naive. He knew his father would still control all his movements from the security cameras, so he still had to be discreet.

The door opened and Killua entered the room. That room was Alluka's world, full of toys, dolls and teddies. It would have been every kid's dream, but Killua had always thought it was the total opposite of happiness. Despite its colorful and magical appearance, that room was just a prison made for his sister to keep her trapped in there and away from the real world. It was so frustrating.

Alluka had always told him that she was happy in there, and as long as Killua kept visiting her she didn't wish for anything more. But with the passing years, Killua knew she was more and more eager to leave those four walls that remained her imprisoned in there, and meet the outside world. He knew she was genuinely happy when he visited her, but the rest of the time she was bored and wanted nothing more than to escape from there.

And if they were lucky, today could be that day.

Alluka lifted her gaze from the book she was reading at hearing the door opening, and Killua could see how her sky blue eyes shone with happiness and emotion when she recognized his big brother.

"Onii-chan!" She called him, as a wide grin tugged at her lips and she ran to Killua to give him a tight hug.

Killua softly smiled at her and tenderly placed his arms around her. He didn't want to ruin the mood, but it was the best opportunity he had to explain his plan to her. Killua lowered his head and approached his lips to his sister’s ear, so that only she could hear what he was going to say.

"Alluka, try not to react to this, please, we need to be discreet since we are being watched. We're leaving. I'm taking you out of here. But I need your help, both yours and Nanika's." Killua felt Alluka inhale sharply, but that along with her arms tightening a bit around his neck was enough indication that she had hear him and wanted to do it.

"First, we are going to play a little in here, as usual, so that the ones watching us let their guards down, at least a bit. Then, when I hug you again, I need Nanika to come out and grant my wish. I need her to teleport us out of here to the little cave at the base of the mountain, you know which one I mean. There I have hidden a pair of bags with everything we need, and after taking them, we'll leave with my Godspeed so that they can't catch us. Could you tell Nanika that? Are you ready, both of you?" Killua asked, worried it would be too much for both his sisters to take in. After all, despite Nanika's powers, they were just two normal girls.

However, as all response, Alluka just separated from him, ending their hug, and with a smile showing on her face she said.

"Let's play, onii-chan!"

And Killua knew they were ready.

It didn't look different from any other day. They played the same games and laughed together at the same jokes. But Killua's heart was racing with anticipation at what was going to come next; their escape. With Illumi out of the house, it was the only time they really had a chance to succeed and Killua had a feeling they could do it. He would free his sisters, and then, he would find Gon and save him, hoping it wasn't too late... No, it wasn't the time to think about that. Of course Gon was okay. He had to focus on what was right in front of him.

When Killua considered it had passed enough time, he approached Alluka and hugged her playfully, burying her face on his chest, so that the cameras couldn't catch Nanika showing up.

"Killua..."

"Hey, Nanika." Killua whispered and squeezed her a bit tighter in his arms. "It's been a longtime, but we'll talk later. You know what you have to do, right? Let's go out of here."

" 'Kay"

Nanika held onto Killua's clothes and granted his wish. In less than a blink, the scenery around them completely changed. They were in the hidden cave he had mentioned to Alluka. They made it.

Without losing a second, he placed one of the bags in his upfront and gave the other one to Nanika. No, Alluka, now again.

"Nanika is tired after granting your wish, so she retired to sleep. But she wanted to thank you. And me too. Thank you, onii-chan! We are so happy!" She stood on her tip toes and planted a sweet kiss on Killua's cheek. Killua smiled softly.

"There is no need to thank me, both of you. And this isn't over yet, we must hurry. Come on, jump on my back."

Alluka did so, and without a second to lose, Killua activated his Godspeed and took them out of that prison-like mansion and far from their terrible family.

Killua had been waiting that opportunity for years. He had been prepared, leaving beforehand everything they needed in a small nearby cave, that only he and her sisters knew of its existence, since they used to play and hide there when they were kids. He had been so careful; after every mission, he went on the cave and left little things that could be of use, until compiling a whole equipment. But he hadn't had the chance to make their escape happen until then, since Illumi had always been on the way. He always accompanied Killua whenever he visited Alluka, so he hadn’t been able to tell her his plan. And even if he did, the moment they would have disappeared, Illumi would be right after them, and even with his Godspeed, Killua was sure his brother would catch them.

But right now, Illumi was occupied with another matter, what left him the freedom to make their escape without him knowing, and when he did, it would already be too late.

Now, Killua had another problem to solve.

Gon.

Illumi was after him, so he had to find his friend and warn him before his brother did. And, that wouldn't be enough; he had to stay at his side and protect him, just as he was doing with Alluka. After all, it was Killua's fault that Illumi wanted to kill him and there was no way he’d let that happen.

He ran faster, to the point that the trees and grass around them became a huge green blur and Killua almost couldn't dodge them when they appeared in front of him. But he was determined not to lower his pace. He had to find Gon as soon as possible.

He felt Alluka's arms tightening around his neck.

"Where are we going, onii-chan?"

"We can go wherever you want, Alluka. But first, I have to find Gon. He's in danger so I must help him."

"Who is this Gon?" She asked with curiosity.

"He is... My friend." Killua answered with a little smile on his lips.

Alluka shrieked in emotion and Killua felt her legs swaying at his sides.

"Onii-chan made a friend?! I am so happy! Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, it happened yesterday, so I didn't really have the time to tell you."

"Tell me about him!"

Killua giggled at his sister's enthusiasm.

"I'm sorry Alluka, but right now I have to focus on the run. But don't worry, you'll know firsthand when you meet him."

"Do you think he'll want to be my friend, too?" She happily asked, but Killua could hear a trace of doubt on her voice.

"Of course. I doubt anyone who really knows you wouldn't want to be your friend. And Gon is very much like you. You'll get along so well, you’ll see."

"I hope so." She replied, feeling a bit better.

"Now, try to sleep a little Alluka. It will be a while until we arrive."

"Okay. I love you, onii-chan." She mumbled against his neck as she closed her eyes.

"Love you too, Alluka"

Killua headed directly towards Yorknew. Gon had told him that he was going there to meet some friends, and the city wasn't too far from their camp, so he guessed his friend had already reached his destination. Killua ran faster than lightning, always careful not to make Alluka feel uncomfortable on his back, and in a matter of a couple of hours they reached the city.

Once they crossed the city's entrance, Killua slowed down so that he was able to look for Gon. He ran from place to place, searching Gon in the crowded streets and parks all around there. It took him some time, but he found Gon in the end, happy as always, probably unaware of Illumi's threat, and most importantly, still alive. The sight of his friend helped to ease his heart a little, but concern still showed on his features. Danger wasn't gone yet.

"GON!" Killua shouted, his voice mixed with a tinge of despair on it, but he couldn't help it.

The tanned boy turned around at the sound of his name, and seemed surprised to see Killua right in front of him. It was in that moment that he realized how much he had missed those caramel eyes.

"Killua."

With Alluka clinging at his back and Gon just a few meters in front of him, he couldn't wish for anything more. He could finally have the life he had always wanted, with the people that really mattered to him. And no one, not even Illumi, was going to keep him from having it.

‘Everything is going to be alright’, he repeated himself.

But something in the back of his mind told him that the worst was still to come.


	8. Chapter 8

They stayed silent for a moment, both still processing the fact that they were together again, after having already convinced themselves that their first meeting would probably be the last one, too. Gon felt at a loss of words as a handful of emotions invaded him: happiness, excitement, surprise, but also confusion and curiosity. He just didn’t know how to express them all.

Fortunately, Leorio and Kurapika quickly approached them and saved Gon from that awkward moment in which he didn’t know how to start a sentence, something that had never happened to him before.

“Gon, you know these people?” Kurapika formally asked. That single question was enough to make Gon to focus and reorganize his feelings. He finally tore his eyes away from Killua and eyed at his old friends with a bright smile on his face, ready to introduce his friends to each other.

“Yeah, of course! This is my friend Killua.” He turned to said boy and continued. “Killua, these are my friends, Kurapika and Leorio. I told you about them, remember?” Gon shifted his gaze to the girl on the other’s back, and without giving Killua time to answer, he added. “Oh, and I guess this one is Alluka. I’m so excited to get to know her!”

Before Gon could keep going, blurting everything that came to his head, the filter in his mouth now completely lost, Killua intervened, cutting him off. He looked serious and a bit nervous, so Gon let him explain.

“Hey Gon, before anything, I have something to tell you. We can do anything you want after that, but this is important. So, can we go to somewhere a bit more private to-“

“Onii-chan, have we arrived yet?” A new sleepy voice sounded from Killua’s back. Gon, as well as the other three of them, stared now at the only girl in the group, who was rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands, trying to take the sleep out of her. When she finally opened her bright blue eyes, their color a few shades lighter than Killua’s, her face lit up at the sight of so many people around her. Alluka started jumping excitedly on his brother’s back, until he finally loosened his grip on her and put her down on the floor. She hurriedly reached closer to the other three of them, her eyes constantly jumping from one to another.

“Who is the friend you told me about, onii-chan? That boy… what was his name- ah yes, Gon!” A warm feeling grew on Gon’s heart at knowing that Killua had mentioned him to his sister. That simple fact, somehow made him so happy. Before Killua had time to answer, his sister exclaimed “Wait! Don’t tell me. I know; it’s the green boy, right?”

Leorio snorted.

“Yes, that’s Gon; our green boy.”

“I knew it!” Alluka turned to Gon and happily introduced herself. “I’m Alluka, nice to meet you!”

Alluka was exactly as Killua had told him. She had the same pale skin as his brother but their similarities ended there. Her eyes were blue as well, but they resembled more to the sky than to the ocean, as Killua’s did. Her hair was the total opposite of his brother’s, long and black, freely falling on her back and adorned with a few accessories on her head and front bangs. She was wearing a loose pink and green dress, which made her look even more adorable. Alluka was like a ray of sunshine, so energetic and excited over the smallest things. Gon instantly loved her. She was like the little sister he’d ever wanted.

“Yeah, I know. Killua told me a lot about you. Nice to meet you, Alluka!”

She dedicated him a bright smile. Now, she turned her eyes to meet at the other two.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t know who you are.” Alluka said with a sheepish smile and a bit guilty tone on her voice.

“Well, it’s only normal, don’t worry about that. I’m Kurapika, and this one here is Leorio.”

“Nice to meet you, Alluka!” Leorio exclaimed with a wide grin on his lips.

“Okay, okay. Now that we all know each other, Gon.” Killua didn’t say anything more, but the way he said his name and the intent look on his eyes was enough for Gon to understand.

“Sure, Killua.” He replied with a warm smile on his lips. “I don’t know where we can go to talk, though.”

“What are you talking about, Gon? We had agreed to go to our house, remember? Killua and Alluka can just come with us, too.”

Both siblings looked surprised at the proposition, Killua more disbelieving while Alluka more eager.

“Really? I am so excited! I’ve never been to another’s house before.” She blurted.

“Of course. Gon’s friends are our friends, too.” Kurapika assured her, sliding a glance to her brother as well, so that he understood that was meant to him, too.

“It’s settled, then. We’re going!” Leorio announced. And with that, he took Kurapika’s hand and extended his other one for Alluka to take. “Come on, Alluka-chan.” A bright smile crossed her face and she wasted no time in accepting his offered hand and let him lead her to their destination.

The three of them started walking towards the exit of the park, leaving Gon and Killua a bit behind.

“I can’t believe she abandoned me so quickly.” Killua muttered, in complete disbelief.

Gon looked at him and giggled at his friend’s occurrence.

“What are you talking about, Killua? She is not leaving you, she is just excited to make new friends.” Killua didn’t look convinced, so he added. “Don’t worry, Killua, Kurapika and Leorio are good people. Trust me, she’ll be alright.”

“If you say so…”

“Hurry up, onii-chan! You too, Gon!” Alluka’s voice shouted from a fair distance before them.

“See? She’s calling for you.” Gon assured him. “Now, let’s follow before we lose them!”

And before Killua could reply to that, Gon grabbed his friend by his left wrist - the one that had the mark matching his own, Gon remembered - and started running after the others, dragging Killua with him. The white haired boy protested a little, but Gon didn’t let go, instead he tightened his grip around Killua’s wrist and ran faster through the park.

Now that they had reunited, Gon wasn’t going to separate that easily from Killua.

Not again.

\--

They didn’t have the chance to talk privately until night had already fallen and Gon, noticing how Killua was getting more and more nervous and impatient with the passing hours, declared Killua and him were tired and were going to sleep. Kurapika and Leorio waved them goodbye from their spot in the couch, watching a movie on the TV, as the two boys left, right after Killua approached her sister, half asleep in the armchair, and placed a goodnight kiss on her forehead. Gon was touched with that affectionate and sweet gesture, a part of Killua he hadn’t seen before, and he hoped, it wasn’t the last time.

The truth was they had all passed a wonderful evening. They talked and laughed a lot while getting to know each other. Gon and Alluka immediately got along, as Killua had predicted, and Kurapika and Leorio seemed to take a fond liking in her, too. Even Killua, who didn't participate much in the conversation, had a little smile playing at his lips most of the time. Gon couldn't help but think that they were like a little family, and his heart filled with a new kind of warmth.

Now, hours later, when everyone was tired and ready to go to bed, Gon and Killua finally retreated themselves to one of the spare rooms in the apartment. But despite the late hours, they didn't go to sleep. Gon knew they had to talk. He ignored what Killua had to tell him so urgently, but it was obvious it was important, so he didn't make him wait any longer. He sat on the edge of the bed, patted on the spot next to him, and when the pale boy joined him, he just listened patiently at what he had to say.

Killua told him everything, or at least Gon thought so, because it really was a lot to take in: his family background, the curse linked to the matching marks on their wrists and the fact that Killua’s older brother was looking for Gon to kill him. But everything passed to a second plane when he noticed Killua's expression at his side. He looked so devastated that he didn't even dare to look at Gon in the face; instead his head was low enough to have his eyes hidden under his bangs. It was painfully sad to see his friend like that. Without thinking it twice, Gon closed the small distance separating them and placed his arms around Killua's thin figure, trapping him in a comforting hug.

"W-what are you doing?" Killua stuttered, surprised by Gon’s sudden gesture.

"I'm hugging you. You won't admit it, but you need it. So I am here for you." Gon simply answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"I-idiot! Why would you hug me- why would you even want to be here after everything I told you? You should be running away."

"And why would I do that?" Gon replied, confused about what Killua expected him to do.

"Because I only gave you a lot of problems. It's my fault my brother is after you and wants to kill you. If we hadn't met, you could live on without worrying for your life at each second." The boy in his arms answered quietly, his voice filled with guilt and growing sadness.

"That's not true!” Gon quickly assured him. “I've never, not even for one single second, wished I hadn't met you. Don’t worry about your brother, he won’t find us so easily; we’ll figure it out. You are my friend, Killua, and that will never change."

Silence fell between them for a moment, and Gon thought Killua was considering and accepting his words. However, it didn’t seem to be the case, as the pale boy insisted with even a weaker voice.

"I don't deserve to be your friend, Gon. You are so pure and full of life... You shouldn't involve yourself with someone like me. I've done horrible things. I'm an assassin. I'm a monster."

Gon realized that Killua’s guilt from before had increased and turned into something deeper. It was now pure self-hatred. Gon couldn’t stand his friend talking like that about himself, especially when everything he said wasn’t true at all. If Killua couldn’t see how a wonderful and an important person he was for him, then he’ll have to let him know.

"Don't ever say that again! You are not a monster, Killua. Yeah, you've killed people, but for what you've told me you were obligated; it wasn't your choice. You never liked it, and you are truly regretful, and that's all that matters. You are a good person, Killua. I am happy to be your friend- no, I am happy to be your soulmate!" Gon replied, as he tightened his hold on Killua to emphasize his words and not let place for the other to doubt them in the slightest.

Gon felt Killua's shoulders slightly shaking and the moment later, Killua let his head fall onto Gon's shoulder, burying his face on it, and slowly circled his arms around Gon's middle, finally returning the embrace. Gon knew Killua was having a hard time in that moment, and so he started to slowly and carefully run his fingers through the other’s white locks of hair, trying to calm him down.

"You shouldn't be." Killua replied after a while, once he managed to steady himself, and somehow he sounded a bit happier."Illumi said it would be the death of us."

Gon had been thinking about it, about the Zoldyck curse, the marks, the soulmates - that not deathmates; that word was so wrong and Gon hated it the moment Killua said it out loud- and he came to a conclusion.

"Your brother and your whole family got everything wrong. These marks don't represent a curse, but just the opposite; I believe they’re your salvation. It's your chance to meet a special someone that can take you out of that dark world you live in. Feelings don't make people weak, but stronger and capable of the impossible. I am sure the incident with your ancestor was just that, an accident, and then your family got it all wrong. You don't have to kill your soulmates, because they do nothing but good to you. They are your way out of the darkness you all live in, I am sure of that." Gon pulled back just enough to see Killua face to face. "So Killua, let me be the one to light up your path in life. Let me stay at your side and guide you when you are lost. Let me be your soulmate."

Gon couldn't explain it, but he felt a connection with Killua that he had never felt with anyone else. Maybe it was some kind of soulmate magic, or maybe they just happened to have good affinity between them. Maybe it was both. But it didn't mattered. He was so happy to have this special bond with the boy in front of him, and he wished Killua felt the same, too.

Gon looked at the white haired boy and was met with wide ocean eyes staring at him and normally pale cheeks now flushed a light red. Gon thought he was beautiful like that. Killua looked down and gently took his right wrist, turning it upright so that the lightning mark printed on it was now visible. Killua lightly caressed the skin under his mark, sending shivers through Gon's spine, and both of them found themselves smiling.

"Idiot... You already are." Killua confirmed in a soft voice.

That was everything Gon needed.

He slid his hand under Killua’s grasp until he took hold of his pale hand, intertwining their fingers together. This time, Killua didn’t tense or shy away, instead he squeezed their hands, tightening the grip a bit more. After a moment in which neither of them said anything more, Gon crawled on the bed and laid on the mattress, dragging Killua with him.

And once again, they fell asleep side by side and holding hands, closer than yesterday and their hearts beating with the start of a new feeling.


	9. Chapter 9

“Onii-chan, Gon, wake up! Breakfast is ready!”

Alluka’s loud voice in the morning, coming from behind the closed door, woke Killua from his light but still restful sleep. However, his eyes remained closed, not wanting to get up yet. He normally woke up without problem, but right now he was so warm and comfortable that he refused to leave the bed.

“Killua?” A new voice sounded in the room, this time, right next to him. And despite not wanting to get up, Killua found himself opening his eyes and staring at the owner of that voice. Gon was looking at him with wide eyes and a smile tugging at his lips, and Killua was happy that, this time, he didn’t have to go.

“Good morning, Killua!”

It was then that Killua realized how close they were, their faces just inches apart, so close that Killua could distinguish the tiny freckles splayed on the other’s cheeks; and their fingers were still laced together, pale and tanned skin intertwining as if being one and only. And somehow, the acknowledgement of those details made Killua utterly embarrassed. Was that a normal situation between friends? Killua couldn’t tell, as he’d never had any friends before, and even if it was, he couldn’t help the flush that rose to his cheeks.

“Morning, Gon.” He replied, trying to ignore the heat on his face.

Gon’s smile grew even bigger and his eyes seemed to shine more brightly, to the point that they looked like melted gold with the morning sunlight on them. Killua couldn’t stop looking at them. That was, until Gon suddenly sat up on the mattress.

“Come on, Killua. Alluka said breakfast is ready, we should be going.”

That was the last thing he wanted to do in that moment. He closed his eyes again and groaned, burying his face a little more on the pillow.

“You can go if you want, I’m staying here.”

Gon giggled at the comment.

“I didn’t know you were such a sleepyhead.”

“I’m not. But today I am extra comfy here so I don’t want to get up, yet.”

“Well, if you don’t get up on your own, I guess I’ll have to make you do it.” Gon said with a mischievous smirk on his lips.

“And how do you plan to do it?” Killua asked, not really impressed.

“Are you sure you want to find out?”

“Surprise me.”

Just after those two words left his mouth, Gon launched towards Killua, landing on top of him and pinning him to the bed. Killua panicked for a moment; Gon had been so fast that even if he hadn’t woken up just two minutes ago, he would have had trouble to dodge the movement. And then, he felt a new kind of panic when he realized again their positions. But it didn’t last long, because Gon quickly proceeded with his plan, which was basically, torturing Killua with endless tickles.

Killua didn’t have time to be surprised by Gon’s crazy idea. The only things he could do in that moment were laugh, roll on his place trying to kick Gon off of him, plead Gon to stop and laugh even more.

“Please! Gon, s-stop that!” Killua cried between chuckles, using the little air that remained on his lungs.

“Not until you promise to go eat breakfast with me right now!”

“Okay, okay, you win. I promise. Now stop tickling me, G-gon!” He was laughing so hard that a couple of tears came to the corners of his eyes.

Gon’s fingers left his sides, and after a few deep intakes of air, Killua felt like he could breathe normally again. After a few moments, Killua noticed that Gon was still there, sitting on his stomach on top of him, just staring at the boy under him. Killua opened his mouth to say something, but immediately closed it when Gon’s hands cupped his, now completely red, cheeks and his thumbs ran back and forth on them, wiping the happy tears away. The tenderness of those light moves on his skin and the softness of Gon’s expression reminded Killua of the time when Gon had healed him from his - still present - wound on his wrist. But this time, it made his heart race on his chest.

The door opened loudly in that moment, as an energetic and a bit upset Alluka entered the room without warning. Gon and Killua paralyzed, and just managed to move their eyes to look at the girl on the door.

“I told you both to get up, now! We are all waiting-“

Alluka stopped on his tracks when she saw the situation the two boys were in. A long second of silence passed between the three of them and then, Alluka said, before leaving with a knowing smile and closing the door after her.

“Oh, you can keep going, don’t worry. I guess we’ll start without you. You can have breakfast a bit later. Sorry to interrupt!”

Killua’s cheeks reddened even more, if that was possible. What was his sister thinking?! He was almost afraid to look up at Gon, but when he did it, Killua found him slightly blushing and looking a bit nervous. It was the first time that Killua saw his friend like that, so he blinked twice before saying, to brighten up the mood.

“W-well, I think we should go have breakfast now. After all, I promised to you.”

“Y-yeah, you are right.”

Gon went off of him and out of the bed and waited for Killua to do the same, with one of his usual smiles back on his face, as if wanting to tell him that everything was alright. And Killua believed him.

They left the bedroom and headed towards the kitchen, where Kurapika, Leorio and Alluka were having breakfast and animatedly talking.

“Gon! Onii-chan! Finally, I thought you weren’t going to wake up until noon!” Alluka exclaimed, winking in their direction without the others seeing. Killua was instantly relieved. He had feared that his sister had told the house owners about what she had seen and misinterpreted some minutes ago. He was thankful she didn’t.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. It was Killua’s fault, though! He just didn’t want to leave the bed.” Gon replied, chuckling.

Killua just hummed and listened to the others laughing at him. After all, that was part of the truth, so he couldn’t deny it. He took a seat on the table, and Gon quickly occupied the chair next to him.

“So, what were you talking about before we arrived?” Killua asked Alluka, as he covered his toast with an extra amount of chocolate cream.

“Oh yes! We were discussing the menu for the wedding! Kurapika and I like strawberry cake for the dessert, but Leorio prefers cheesecake.”

“Well, everybody likes cheesecakes!” The tall man insisted, though he seemed to know it was a lost battle.

“But they are so common. We need something a bit different and much tastier. And strawberry cake is delicious, just the perfect choice.” Kurapika tried to reason.

“Maybe you can help us decide! Which one do you prefer?” Alluka asked the two boys.

“I go for the chocolate cake. It’s the best and only option you should be considering.” Killua deadpanned, as he took a big bite of his chocolate covered toast.

“W-wait a moment. Which wedding are you all talking about? Who are getting married?” Gon asked with a frown forming on his face, totally confused of the meaning behind the conversation.

“You didn’t tell him?” Alluka questioned.

“Well… we tried, but never really had the chance to do it.” Leorio answered with a sheepish smile.

“And he didn’t guess it, either? Because you didn’t tell me, but I knew almost from the beginning.”

“Yeah, I figured it out, too.” Killua added; because really, it was pretty obvious.

“I guess Gon is so oblivious to these things.” Leorio suggested with a sigh.

“Are you sure?” Alluka remarked with a smirk and a glance to the boys’ direction.

“Guys!” Gon raised his voice above all the others, ignoring Alluka’s last comment. Killua saw he was getting a bit impatient. “Can someone tell me what are you talking about, please?”

Kurapika chuckled a little at Gon’s nervousness, and calmly gave him the answer.

“We are talking about our wedding, Gon. Leorio and I are getting married next year.” Kurapika gave him an honest smile as he took Leorio’s hand with his and showed Gon the matching rings on both of them; their engagement rings.

Killua saw how Gon almost chocked the cereal he was eating.

“What?! How… When… wait- Is that even possible?!” he sounded both confused and surprised, but Killua could detect a slightly happy tinge on his voice.

All the presents laughed out loud at Gon’s questions.

“Of course it is, dummy.” Killua teased him.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Alluka asked, still giggling.

“Well… you are both boys, so-“

“Gon, don’t tell me you are-“ Leorio was cut down by Kurapika’s hand on his shoulder, who then turned to face Gon and collectedly asked.

“Do you think is that a problem?”

Gon quickly replied to the question, as he seemed to have a clear answer to it.

“Of course not! It’s just, it’s the first time I hear about two men being engaged, that’s all. But now, it makes perfect sense. And if you are happy, I am happy for you, too.” Gon answered, with a genuine grin.

“See? I told you he would be fine with this.” Kurapika told Leorio, playfully nudging him on the ribs with his elbow.

“Yeah, yeah. You were right and I was wrong, as always. Come here.” Leorio said as he placed his arm around Kurapika’s shoulders, approaching his fiancé to him.

“You should be used to it by now.” Kurapika teasingly replied, making himself comfortable in Leorio’s chest.

“Now that I see you, you really make a great couple. I’m looking forward to your wedding!” Gon commented.

“Right? They are perfect to each other. I’m so excited to see you getting married! Can I go to the wedding, too?” Alluka excitedly asked the couple.

“Of course, you are all invited.”

“Yay!”

“Well… that is if we are able to make it.” Killua muttered, in a somber tone. All the eyes on the kitchen were now turned to him, curious and worried, and it was then that Killua realized that he had talked his thought out loud.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to spoil the good mood. But it’s true. Gon,” Killua turned to face the boy next to him, who was already watching him with a serious expression. “I already told you, you are in danger. Illumi is after you. We must run away to avoid he finds and kills you.”

“O-onii-chan, what are you talking about?” Alluka questioned with a terrified look on her eyes.

“Yeah, Killua, what are you saying? Someone wants to kill Gon? That’s ridiculous; Gon is one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. I can’t imagine someone being so mad at him to the point of wanting to kill him.” Leorio remarked, unbelieving.

“Killua, explain yourself, please.” Kurapika encouraged him.

And so he did. He summed up everything that had happened in the last couple of days in the best way he could, Gon helping him in the worst parts, when he felt a knot on his throat and words didn’t want to come out.

“That’s… crazy.” Leorio just managed to say, still shocked from what he had just listened.

“I know. That’s how all my family is, except for Alluka and I.”

“So, what are you going to do now? Will you be alright?” Kurapika questioned, genuinely concerned about their situation.

“I don’t know. We must run away, the furthest the better, and never staying in one place for longer than a few days. We must avoid Illumi at all costs. If he finds us… it will be the end.”

Killua was very worried about this plan. If they failed, they wouldn’t have another chance. Illumi would kill Gon and bring Killua and Alluka back to their house, their prison, just to be their family’s little puppets once again. Killua didn’t want to think about that possibility, not when he had just reencountered with Gon, not when he had just abandoned the mansion and freed his little sister from her imprisonment.

A firm hand landed on his shoulder, squeezing it in a reassuring way, as if being a reminder that he was not alone in this.

“Everything will be fine, Killua. Your brother won’t find us; I’ll make sure of it. And if someone or something gets in our way, I’ll protect you and Alluka.”

Killua lightly snorted at the irony of the situation.

“I should be the one saying that. But, thank you.” He honestly replied, and Gon gave him a bright smile in return.

“Don’t worry, onii-chan. Once we put a bit of distance, Illumi will lose track of us and won’t be able to find us. And in the meantime, we’ll travel to a lot of different places and discover new countries and cities. It will be fun!”

“Yes, you’re right. It will be an adventure. Our adventure.” He repeated now a bit more animated, looking at his two new travel companions, and he couldn’t have thought of two better people to accompany him in the long journey they had ahead.

The next day, they left Leorio’s and Kurapika’s apartment at dawn, after giving their goodbyes to the couple and promising to come back before the wedding.

And with new hopes on their hearts, they started the way to their new life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!!!
> 
> So, here ends the first part of this story. I'd love to read what you think about it in the comments! ^^
> 
> I'm already working on the second part, but I don't have much of it written yet, so unfortunately I will have to pause the updates for a while, until I have enough material to continue. I didn't want to come to this situation, but it has been a bit difficult to keep writing and advancing in the story while at the same time having to go back and revise previous chapters before uploading them. That's why I want to have a good amount of new chapters, maybe even the whole story (I'm not sure how much longer this will get), before updating again, but hopefully it won't take me too long. I'm very sorry for this but I hope you understand. 
> 
> And finally I wanted to thank you all who left kudos and comments, because really, it means a lot ♡. And even if you just silently read this story, also thank you for reading and giving it a chance.
> 
> See you soon!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!!!
> 
> After spending some time writing the upcoming chapters, I am finally back with his fic! Updates will be the same as before, one chapter per week; at least that's what I'll try because this semester I'm being very busy, but I'll do my best to upload on time!
> 
> So, here begins the second part of the story. Enjoy! ^^

"Woah! We are so high!" Alluka exclaimed; her nose pressed against one of the dirigible windows, and her eyes wide open and shining with excitement, looking down at the ground hundreds of meters below them.  
  
The three of them had headed directly to the airport right after leaving Leorio’s and Kurapika's apartment, and had taken the first flight that would take them the furthest away from there, so that they could decrease the probabilities of Illumi finding them. Now, three hours after separating their friends and having bought their tickets with false identifications, they were on board a dirigible leading them to another continent.  
  
Gon felt Killua relaxing at his side the moment they took off. The pale boy had been so tense during their way to the airport and their waiting in there until their flight arrived. Gon knew he was worried about their brother finding them, and had tried to calm him down by placing a comforting hand on his shoulder at times, but although Killua always answered his gesture with a small smile on his lips, his tension and nervousness didn't completely disappear until that moment.  
  
Now, after Alluka's amused intervention, Killua focused his attention on her, and chuckled seeing her excitement. Gon couldn't help but to smile as well.  
  
"Yeah, and we might go even higher." Her brother happily added.  
  
"Great! Look, the houses below are as tiny as ants! I can hardly see them. Oh, and look the clouds around us, they're so close! I wished I could go out and touch them, they seem so soft!" The girl continued exclaiming, pointing out everything that caught her attention.  
  
Gon giggled a little, remembering he was once like her, and answered with a soft smile.  
  
"Clouds are very pretty, aren't they?"  
  
"Yeah, I've missed a lot the sight of the blue sky and the soft clouds flying on it." She replied, getting calmer from her previous excitement and admiring the view with a nostalgic look on her eyes.  
  
Gon frowned, confused by her words.  
  
"You... missed it?" He repeated.  
After a few seconds, Alluka finally separated her face from the window and looked at him in the eyes, with a little sad smile on her face.  
  
"Mmh. I haven't been able to go out for a while."  
  
"That's a simple way of putting it." Killua replied with a voice filled with resentment. "They locked you inside your room and didn't let you go out for years." He added as his fists curled with growing anger at his sides.

Gon's eyes widened in surprise; he couldn't believe it. He knew their family had done horrible things to Killua, but didn't know they had been so awful towards Alluka as well. Although, thinking about it, it shouldn't be surprising. That new piece of information about the siblings’ background only helped to increase his growing hatred towards their terrible family.  
  
"But everything is okay, because onii-chan took us out of there. Now, we can live together and away from our family." She quickly added for the two of them, and a wide and genuine grin played at her lips. "We're so happy!"  
  
"We?" Gon asked, confused once again.  
  
"Yeah, Nanika and I. You don't know her yet, but you will soon. I can't wait for her to come out and enjoy our new life on the outside!"  
  
Gon was more confused with each word Alluka said. There wasn't anyone else there apart from the three of them, so who was Nanika and where was she? But he decided not to think too much about it; he trusted both siblings and knew they would tell him when the time comes.  
  
"Me too, she's been enclosed for so long. It's time for her to come out and have some fun, but you know it's dangerous to do it when there are people around. Anyway, she can come out the moment we are alone. It's been a long time since we really talked, and I want her to meet Gon, too." Killua answered, now seeming happier, looking at him at the last sentence.  
  
Gon, even if he still didn't understand very well what they were talking about, could just smile and reply.  
  
"I can’t wait to meet her!"  
  
Both siblings seemed delighted to hear that, and the moment Alluka turned again to look outside the window, he felt a light touch on his hand. Gon turned his head and discovered Killua's hand gently placed over his own, and when he looked up he was met with soft eyes and a warm smile, and he instantly knew it was Killua's way to say 'thank you'.  
  
Gon didn't feel he had done anything for what the white haired boy should thank him, but after a few seconds staring at his intense blue eyes, he understood. It was a thank you for understanding and accepting them as they were, not pushing what would be the logical questions on them and trusting them instead, giving them the time they needed to be ready to explain things.  
  
Gon thought it had been a very sweet gesture from him, and before the pale boy could retreat his hand, he laced their fingers together, so that he couldn't escape from his touch. Since the first moment their hands had held together, back on the day they met, Gon loved how perfectly they fitted against each other, as well as the warm feeling the single gesture left in his heart. By now, he longed for the moment he could take Killua’s hand in his once again, and so he didn’t miss the opportunity he was so easily offered this time. Killua flushed a little at his side but didn't resist. He seemed as eager as Gon was to keep holding onto him for a bit longer.  
  
In the end, their hands remained clasped together for the rest of the flight.  
  


\--

The first thing they did when they landed was go into the city and look for a cheap but decent hotel where they could stay for a couple of days and leave their luggage before getting to know the place. It wasn’t a difficult task to do, since it seemed that prices in that city weren’t very high, so they managed to find a nice hotel quickly without spending much of the money Killua had brought with him after his and Alluka’s escape. He had been prepared and taken with him as much money as he could, because he knew they would need it, but he was also aware they would run out of it eventually - even faster having Gon travelling with them - so Killua was determined to waste just the strictly necessary, so that it would last them the longest.

That being done, now they were free to spend their time in the city as they wished, or more accurately, as his sister did. Killua didn’t really mind where they went; knowing they were safe and together was enough for him in that moment, and Gon just happily agreed with Alluka to wherever place she suggested to go. They wandered through crowded streets, played and relaxed in a small but charming park and now were heading to a nearby shopping center, as his sister asked if they could go to buy her some new clothes. Killua instantly approved the idea, as he knew she really needed some new sets of clothes. Contrary to himself, that owned a wide range of different outfits, her sister only had a pair of dresses on her wardrobe. Their family had filled the rest of it with ‘boys’ clothes’, stubbornly insisting she was a ‘he’, but Alluka refused to wear them and instead she had lived for years in the same two dresses that Killua had bought her during some of his missions and managed to give her despite their family’s complaints.

Killua smiled widely at seeing her sister’s expression turn into pure joy and excitement. He was so happy that he could give her this, something she ever wanted; because that was the life she deserved. For once, Killua felt he was doing things right.

They arrived at the first shop and Alluka rushed inside, astonished by the wide variety of shapes and colors in the clothes. Gon ran to follow her, and helped her just as enthusiastically to pick the outfits more likely to fit her, as well as pointing out other cute ones that had gone unnoticed by the girl. Killua remained a bit behind for a moment, watching them with a soft expression on his features. He was touched that Gon was so eagerly encouraging and helping Alluka with this. He probably didn’t know how much it meant for her, but Killua did, and so couldn’t help but to silently thank him once again. It meant the world for him.

He approached them, and after taking a few more clothes, they headed to the changing rooms.

About an hour later, they left the shopping center with hands full of bags and wide grins on their faces. After a long day, first for the flight that had taken them there, and then for their nonstop walking around the city, they finally headed to the hotel, tired but completely satisfied with everything they had accomplished.

“I really liked the yellow dress with the flowers on it. I think it was very cute and it fitted me so well!” Alluka happily blurted out, unable to think about anything else but the new clothes they had just bought her.

“Yeah, it’s true, you looked lovely on it. My favorite was the white blouse with the pink skirt, you were so pretty.” Killua added.

“You think so? I also like that outfit so much!”

“Yes, definitely! And don’t forget the light blue dress. You look so nice in it and it matches your eyes!” Gon remarked.

“Oh, I love that one too. I can’t wait to go outside with the new clothes on!” She exclaimed, truly excited about it.

“Well, you won’t have to wait for long.” Killua kindly answered, as he patted gently her head. It was a simple gesture that he used to do a lot on her, and Alluka normally just closed her eyes and leaned into the touch, so he was slightly confused when he noticed his sister’s attention focused on his hand. It made him stop, and after a pause, he hesitantly asked.

“You don’t like it?”

“Huh?” Her eyes laid on Killua’s once again, and it took her a moment to understand what his brother was talking about. “Of course I like it, onii-chan. It was just… can I see it?”

“See what?”

“And yours too, Gon.” She quickly added, glancing at the tanned boy.

“Mh? What are you talking about, Alluka?”

“The marks on your wrists. Please!”

“Y-yeah, sure.”

Killua was confused at why his sister showed so much interest on it, but he just rolled up his left sleeve and let her see the flame mark printed on his pale skin. Gon did the same and exposed the lightning that looked like drawn with ink on his tanned skin. Her gaze kept moving from one to the other for a moment and her eyes sparkled with some kind of restrained emotion. Killua had no idea what she was thinking.

She kept staring at them a moment longer with a soft expression, before she said.

“I like them. I think they fit you very well.”

“Me too. Whenever I look at it, it reminds me of Killua. They are a beautiful symbol of the connection we have, right?” Gon was now looking intently at him, waiting for his answer. It wasn’t as if Killua didn’t think the same, but admitting it out loud made him quite embarrassed. So after a moment, he couldn’t help the light blush that came to his cheeks when he agreed with him with a quiet and simple ‘yeah’.

Gon grinned at him and Alluka also seemed satisfied with it, so they didn’t say anything more and just resumed their walking. The moment the two boys dropped their hands at their sides, their fingers lightly brushed and somehow, the unexpected and brief contact made Killua’s heart skip a beat. On their way to the hotel, Killua felt their fingers brush once again, and twice, and thrice; and it couldn’t still be a coincidence. He glanced at the boy at his side and saw him smiling at the front while slightly moving his hand, making their fingers touch for the fourth time. So that was it. Killua could also play that game.

His fingers shifted a little to the left and briefly met Gon’s warm ones. The contact still made him a bit nervous, but it also raised a warm feeling in his chest that made it totally worthy. He found himself waiting for the next touch, and when it happened a little smile tugged at his lips, and didn’t hesitate to return the gesture.

They went on for the rest of the walk, and only stopped when they arrived to the hotel. Neither of them talked about that, but they were both smiling a bit too much for the current situation. Alluka probably noticed, Killua thought, but although she looked at them with a raised eyebrow and a knowing look on her eyes, she remained silent and looked away. Truth was Killua wasn’t sure their casual touches were a game anymore, but he didn’t mind; it had made him all happy and warm inside, his heart beat a bit faster than usual and he felt a weird nervousness on his stomach, but overall, it had left him a good feeling. He realized that, with the passing days, he accepted Gon’s touches more easily and began to like them, something that had never happened before to him, except with his sister, and yet, it felt extremely different.

They finally entered their hotel room, and the three of them were so tired that they plumped on the nearest bed. The room wasn’t very big, but had enough space for the three of them. The only problem was the hotel didn’t offer any room with three single beds, so instead they had to adjust to the double room they had been given. But knowing their circumstances, it wasn’t that big of a deal; Gon had quickly stated he could share a bed with Killua, after all, they had done it before, and Killua didn’t have a problem with it, either. On the contrary, the presence of Gon at his side was very comforting and had made him sleep better these last days, so deep down, he really liked the idea of sleeping next to the tanned boy again.

Alluka was the first to sit up, but when she turned to see them, Killua realized, she wasn’t Alluka anymore. Her sky blue eyes seemed now like utterly black pools, and her mouth turned into a black and wide line. She was smiling down at him, and it had been a longtime since he’d last seen that genuine and babylike smile. He only then realized how much he had missed it, how much he had missed her. His second little sister, whose mere existence was a secret only he and Alluka knew, and now Gon, as well.

“Killua…”

Killua immediately sat up and gave her a tight hug, burying his face on her long and smooth hair that was the same as Alluka’s. He felt her slowly and lovingly returning the hug, and at that, Killua only held her closer, tightening the embrace. Now that they were free, not only Alluka, but both his sisters could have a good life, one in which there wouldn’t be any more prisons, of any type.

“Welcome back, Nanika.”


	11. Chapter 11

Gon watched in silence the two siblings tightly embracing each other at his side, as if they hadn’t seen each other in years. And maybe it was true. Killua had called Alluka by another name, ‘Nanika’, and he remembered it was the name of the girl they were talking about before in the dirigible. He had also noticed the change in the girl’s voice and features, and now, Gon thought he finally understood. He couldn’t help the soft smile that came to his lips at the sight of such an emotional reencounter.

After a long minute, they finally separated and smiled at each other, before Killua turned to him, ready to make the presentations.

“Gon, this is Nanika, my other little sister. She shares body with Alluka but they are completely different people, so I want you to meet her, too.” Gon noticed that although he was genuinely happy about presenting Nanika to him, Killua also seemed a bit nervous about it. However, he didn’t have anything to worry about, because he was already widely grinning at her and eager to get to know her.

“Hi Nanika! I’m Gon and we’re gonna be travelling together for a while, so let’s be friends, yeah?”

“Gon…” Nanika just said, as if wanting to test how the name sounded on her mouth. “Alluka talked ‘bout Gon. Gon’s friend. My friend, too.” She added with a growing smile.

Gon noticed how she used short sentences and easy words, just like a little child. Contrary to the energetic Alluka, Nanika was a calm and sweet girl, and Gon instantly liked her. Without thinking it twice, he got up from the bed and stood in front of her, with open arms.

“Then, can I have a hug too?” he asked sheepishly but with a genuine grin.

Nanika seemed surprised by the request, but after a moment, she smiled widely and gladly went in for the hug. She placed her arms loosely around Gon’s middle and he was careful not to embrace her too tight, either. Nanika looked more fragile than Alluka, and so Gon held her delicately in his arms, just as if he was holding a baby. It felt very nice.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Killua watching them with a little grin on his lips; he seemed now happy and relaxed, and that was all Gon wanted, for his friend and soulmate to enjoy their traveling and forget about all the problems his family had caused him. He loved seeing Killua smiling, especially more knowing he was part of the reason for it.

The only meter separating them suddenly felt like hundreds of miles, so Gon, wanting to be as close as possible to the white haired boy, made sure to quickly change that.

“Killua, come here! Group hug!” he exclaimed as he separated a bit from Nanika and extended a hand to him.

Killua hesitated a little, but soon enough took his hand, and before he could approach them on his own, Gon yanked him forward and trapped him in the hug he was sharing with the girl. Killua protested a little for the rashness of the movement, but Gon paid it no mind.

Now the hug was complete, with the girl that was starting to feel like a sister to him and his soulmate in his arms.

Now everything was perfect.

And despite their weariness after the long day they had, they spent the rest of the evening playing little games and telling funny stories to each other, laugher filling the air of the room until late hours in the night.

\---

_Darkness was everywhere. Not even the slightest trace of light could be seen, and Killua just found himself in the middle of nowhere._

_“Killu, come with me. Come back home.” A familiar voice sounded in the dark. A voice Killua knew all too well, and his latest desire was to do what it told him. His shoulders tensed and Killua remained still on his place. The voice came again, now louder and more suggestive than before._

_“Don’t make me repeat it, Killu. You can’t escape from what you are. Do you really think there is someone out there that can like you, after everything you have done? Impossible. That’s how the world is, and your place in it is at our side. You belong with us, Killu. Stop fooling around and return home.”_

_Killua shut his eyes closed and covered his ears with his hands in the middle of the talk, trying to quiet his brother’s voice. But it was helpless, since at some point Illumi’s voice seemed to sound directly in his head, like a perpetual echo that wouldn’t go away no matter what. He resisted, but after a few moments, he found himself lowering his hands and his feet moved him forward on their own, following the sound of the voice in the darkness. Killua tried to stop, but his muscles didn’t respond to him and kept leading him to his brother._

_Light finally came into view, and blinded Killua for a moment. He opened his eyes and discovered Illumi right in front of him. And he wasn’t alone. Alluka was there, hanging in chains in the wall behind his brother, with ripped clothes and hundreds of scars all over her body. Killua felt his blood boil in his veins and turned to Illumi, wanting to shout at him, fight him, kill him, because how dared he touch his lovely and happy little sister?! _

_But his words died in his mouth when the sight of his sister faded in the air like smoke and was replaced by the image of Gon trapped in his brother’s grip, holding a needle dangerously close to one vital point in his neck. Killua paralyzed, and his heart clenched in his chest. _

_This couldn’t be happening._

_“So, Killu. Are you going to kill him, or do I have to do it myself?”_

_Killua watched as Gon resisted in his brother’s arms, what only served to tighten the grip on him and pull the needle closer, slightly piercing Gon’s skin and letting out a thin trail of blood down his neck._

_“Killua…”_

_Gon whispered in a rough voice, as he watched him with pleading eyes. Killua was desperate to do something but his body didn’t respond to him, so he could just keep staring at the horror in front of him, with wide watery eyes and trembling breaths._

_“G-”_

_At the very first sound of Killua trying to say Gon’s name, his brother stuck the poisoned needle all through his neck and Killua watched terrified how Illumi let him fall carelessly onto the floor as life slowly escaped from him…_

“Killua! Wake up!”

Killua snapped his eyes open, and again, he was surrounded by darkness. But this time, it felt different. It was a comforting darkness, or rather, the presence at his side made it that way; one hand on his shoulder, shaking him to wake up, and the other holding tightly against his own, reassuringly.

“Hey. Don’t worry, it was just a nightmare. Everything is fine.” Gon murmured in a soft voice. And it was just then that he noticed the cold sweat covering his back and forehead and how rapid and agitated he had been breathing until then. The weight of the duvet he felt over him helped Killua to confirm what Gon said; he was in the hotel room. Nothing had happened; it had just been a dream.

Killua looked up at his best friend, and was met with the tender look on Gon’s warm eyes, directed at him. And suddenly, it felt too much for Killua, because just a moment ago he had seen and let Gon die on his brother’s hands and now he was with him, touching and comforting him, looking only at him. And he was okay, and most importantly, he was alive.

“G-gon…” his voice broke in that moment, and was incapable to say anything more. Gon wordlessly approached him and hugged him gently, letting Killua bury his head on his chest. And he found that he couldn’t resist the tears anymore. He grabbed Gon’s T-shirt tightly and finally tears fell down his face as they hadn't done in years, in muffled sobs and with shaking shoulders. Gon didn’t say anything, just held him closer and waited, running his fingers tenderly through his hair, in a soothing and feathery touch.

Minutes passed, and finally Killua managed to calm down a bit. It was when he stopped shivering that Gon finally talked.

“You wanna talk about it?”

Killua sniffed before quietly answering.

“Not really. It was… Illumi.”

And just with that Gon seemed to understand everything.

“It’s okay, Killua. We are very far from your house, so I’m sure he doesn’t know where we are. We are safe. You won’t have to see him ever again.”

“You don’t know him, Gon. I am sure he will find us someday. He always gets what he wants.”

“Well, too bad for him, because so do I. Even if he finds us, I won’t let him do anything to us. I won’t permit it, I promise.”

“He is strong. Very strong. We can’t defeat him that easily, Gon. I’m just… afraid, of what will happen when he finds us. I don’t want to return with my family, and I don’t want them to be near Alluka ever again. And I… I don’t want to lose you.” He buried his head a bit more in Gon’s chest at the last part, both for emotional support and hiding the slight flush that covered his cheeks.

“Don’t worry Killua. We’ll figure it out. I’m not giving up on you, on us.” Gon reassured him, and held him a bit tighter before adding. “I’m right here.”

A long sigh escaped from Killua’s lips, both touched and a bit exasperated. He was grateful that Gon was trying so hard in comforting him, and he wanted to blindly believe everything he was assuring him to be true. He really wanted to. But deep down, he knew that, this time, his friend was wrong. Even so, Killua really appreciated Gon’s determination on them, and that last sentence, just knowing he was remaining at his side, was everything he needed to hear on that moment.

He separated a bit from Gon, just enough so that they could see each other on the face, their noses almost touching.

“I know. Thank you.” A little genuine smile started tugging on his lips.

“Anytime.” Gon grinned at him and reached his hands to Killua’s face, wiping away the still remaining tears on his cheeks with warm and caring fingers. Then, leaned in and planted a small kiss on his forehead.

“Gon, what-?!” Killua started, feeling his face blushing furiously. He could still feel the ghost of Gon’s lips lightly brushing against his skin, and the feeling made his heart race on his chest.

“Mito-san always used to do this whenever I had a nightmare. She said a kiss on the forehead keeps the nightmares away, and I can say it really worked. So I just thought it would help you, too.”

Killua’s cheeks reddened even more, because really, how could Gon talk and act so sweetly towards him? It made him remember that no one in his whole life, apart from his sisters, had been so caring to him, and he felt the sudden urge to give him a kiss back, so that he knew how much he meant for him, too. But of course, he didn’t; he would die from embarrassment before it. So instead, he just honestly replied.

“Mh, I think it works.” As thoughts about his brother were being replaced by thoughts about the boy just a few inches in front of him; he could only focus on Gon, his sweet words, his gentle touches and his soft kiss on his forehead, and he found himself flushing once again. Why couldn’t he stop thinking about him?

“That’s great.” The tanned boy whispered and after staring at him for a moment longer, he added. “We should go back to sleep, then.” He began to separate from Killua and return to his spot on the big bed, but before Killua could process what he was doing, he extended an arm and grabbed Gon’s wrist tightly, not allowing him to go any further from him.

Gon’s eyes widened at the gesture, and Killua himself was also surprised, but it took him just a second to realize what he wanted.

“Don’t go away. Stay close.”

Gon’s features softened at Killua’s request, and he immediately reached closer again, lying in his previous position.

“Always.”

They looked each other in the eyes for the last time before they both closed them and fell asleep again, all the despair and fear Killua had felt before now replaced by a new warmth covering his heart.


	12. Chapter 12

A couple of weeks had passed since the beginning of their travel and they were now in the fifth city on their plan. All the cities they arrived to were quite big, with lots of places worth visiting, so they spent their days sightseeing, taking pictures and basically having fun. But although they were truly enjoying their travelling together, their nonstop moving through the streets was really tiring in the end. And that was why that morning, Alluka had woken up a bit lazy and not in the mood to continue their tour around the city they were currently in, and instead she decided to take the day off.

The boys, more used than her to constant exercise and movement in their lives, weren't tired as she was and wanted to go outside and let go all of their restrained energy. However, they also didn't want to leave the girl alone in the hotel room, and so the three of them spent the whole morning together, inside the little space provided by the four walls around them. They played various games and watched a couple of movies on the TV, Alluka switching with Nanika from time to time, so that both of them enjoyed the moment. It was relaxing but pretty great in the end; a nice change.

But Alluka seemed to know how eager the boys were to go outside, so after having a quick lunch she insisted they should go out and just leave her there. Killua wasn't fond of that idea but Alluka assured him she would be alright, and remarking that a girl also needed time for her own, he was finally convinced. Just before leaving, they promised not to be out for too long, but his sister just dismissed them with a tired gesture of her hand and closed the door right on their noses.

"Wow, don't need to be so harsh. She really did want us to go." Killua muttered under his breath with a little frown, after Alluka's action. "Anyway. So, what do we do?" He asked, now looking at his friend.

Gon seemed to think for a moment, until his face lit up with an idea.

"Oh, actually there's something I've always wanted to do with you, but it was never the right time; so we can try it now!"

"And what is it?"

"Let's spar Killua!"

The pale boy hadn't expected that, but now that Gon had proposed sparring together, he was looking forward to it. After all, he had been amazed by Gon's quick movements more than once, and wanted to see for himself how good the other was in combat. He doubted Gon could defeat him, but was curious about the strong aura that emanated from his body, and definitely wanted to feel its power against him. So he didn't think it twice and agreed with a smirk on his lips.

They went down the stairs of the building and went out and into the garden owned by the hotel. It was more like a forest in miniature; a great surface of green grass with trees here and there and even a small pond in one corner. And it was empty, so it was just the perfect place for their sparring: wide, natural and private.

They positioned in front of each other and prepared themselves before starting the fight. Killua was very excited; he knew Gon was an enhancer, and a pretty strong one judging by his aura, and he wondered if he had finally found an opponent who would keep up a fight with him. He looked up at his friend, and he seemed as eager to start as he was. They smirked simultaneously before adopting a fighting position and starting the countdown.

"One..." Gon started, knees slightly flexed, fists ready and eyes not leaving Killua's.

"Two..." Killua followed, one leg stretched behind to let him have a good stance and a fast impulse, his eyes locked on Gon's caramel ones.

"Three!" The two of them shouted at the same time, and so the sparring began.

In the blink of an eye, Killua activated his Godspeed, closed the distance between them and aimed a kick to Gon's head. The tanned boy knew about his high speed, and thus had been waiting the fast attack. However, he couldn't have imagined the real quickness of his movements, and so he couldn't manage to dodge the attack, but just block the kick with his forearm. And still, Killua was impressed; no one before had managed to react to any of his quick attacks before.

But Killua didn't stop there. He connected a series of punches and kicks to the boy, but Gon blocked them all, even dodged some of the slower moves. That only made Killua more excited about the fight. He separated a little, ready to make another approach, but he soon realized that had been a mistake, as it gave Gon the opportunity to finally return the attacks back. They were indeed fast, and though not as much as Killua's, he had trouble and needed to focus his attention on dodging them.

Soon enough, Killua found an opening on Gon's posture and didn't hesitate to use it in his favor. He extended his palm to Gon's open side and let the electricity flow out of his hand and onto the other's body. The action had taken the tanned boy off of guard, but unfortunately didn't seem to make much effect on him - after all, Killua had controlled the amount of electricity to reach him and decreased it nearly to the minimum, worried it would severely damage his friend. But it seemed his concern only served to give Gon another opportunity.

This time, the boy didn't approach Killua, but got back, increasing the distance between them. His hands quickly flied to his side and an orangish light came from them, bathing his tanned skin with a warm color. Killua instantly knew that would be the final blow, and Gon, being and enhancer, would put all his strength on it. Killua recognized it would be almost impossible to block, and very difficult to dodge, so he could just counterattack with a move of his own.

Killua liberated all his Nen and felt the electricity involving his whole body and coming out of his skin in bright sparkles. Just before Gon could relish his attack, Killua jumped high, gathered all his power in his hand and let out a lightning thrown in Gon's direction. This time it worked.

The lightning left Gon paralyzed for a moment, and the next one he started falling forward, unable to keep standing anymore. Killua, now on the ground again, quickly approached and caught him in his arms before he hit the ground, worried it had been too much.

"Gon, are you-?"

He couldn't finish the sentence, as a foot chained with his right ankle, making him loose his balance and fall on his back. The impact with the ground was hard, especially more as he was still holding Gon and he had fallen with him, landing on top of him. Killua looked up at Gon and found him with a wide grin spreading on his face.

"Looks like I win." Gon innocently and cheerfully declared.

Killua felt dumbstruck for a moment, unable to realize what had just happened. Right now, he could just think of Gon's closeness, bodies pressed together and faces just inches apart.

He obliged himself to focus.

"Huh?! That was cheating!"

"Nah huh, you should never trust your enemy is beaten until you check it with your own eyes. Kaito taught me that." He remarked, his smile not leaving his face.

"I thought you were injured! I-I was worried about you." And he felt his cheeks unintentionally warming at the last sentence, which he murmured in a low voice.

At that confession, Gon's eyes widened in realization and his smile faltered. He turned suddenly shy and lowered his gaze. Killua noticed his cheeks also turned a light pink color.

"Oh... I-I'm sorry, I hadn't realized you would concern so much... It wasn't my intention to make you worry."

Killua let out a sigh and lightly smiled; he couldn't stay angry at him after that honest apology. He lifted his hand and cupped Gon’s cheek with it, lightly rubbing his thumb back and forth along it. The tender gesture made Gon focus his gaze on Killua once again, and as many times before, they lost themselves on each other’s eyes.

After staring for a while, Killua's grin widened a little, and answered.

"It's okay. You're okay, and that's what matters."

Gon continued staring for a moment, as if he hadn't hear what he had said, but then focused again and shook violently his head.

"It's not okay, Killua. I haven't considered how you would feel about my dirty trick; I just focused on winning and ignored everything else. And that was very wrong of me." The boy vehemently insisted.

"Really Gon, that's okay, there is nothing-"

"So now, to have the right to ask for your forgiveness, you can make me do whatever you want."

"What?! I tell you-"

"No, I deserve it. I'll do whatever you say, so just tell me." The boy on top of him said with determination showing on his eyes.

"Wh-whatever?" Killua repeated dumbstruck, and Gon nodded with energy in reply.

He didn't know what to say. It wasn't as if there was nothing he wanted the other to do, but just he was too shy to ask for it. He wanted to touch Gon, and he was already doing it, feeling the warmth the boy irradiated in his hand cupping the other’s cheek. He wanted to hug Gon, his hold on him always felt very comforting and made him feel safe; and yet they were practically doing in that moment, their bodies pressed against each other with the force of gravity. What else did he want from him?

He looked up at Gon’s face and couldn't help but to examine his features from the close distance: sweet honey brown eyes staring only at him, tiny freckles barely distinguishable against the tanned skin on his cheeks, cute slightly pointy nose almost brushing his own, soft thin lips he suddenly felt the urge to know how they felt against-

That was right. There was another thing he wanted from Gon, but he’d die from embarrassment before telling him.

He wanted to kiss Gon.

It wasn't the first time he did think about it. The thought had first come to him the time Gon had comforted him after having a nightmare on their first night of travelling, and came back on certain moments, more frequent as days passed and their friendship grew stronger, but it never lasted long. Now, however, he was quite struggling to think about anything else.

"I really don't know..." He finally answered in a low and not very convincing voice; a lie. His eyes were still locked on Gon's lips.

"Can I suggest something, then?" Gon’s tone sounded slightly nervous, and at that, Killua finally looked him in the eyes again.

"Sure." He wasn't sure at all.

"Can I… kiss you?" Gon asked him in a low whisper, but their faces were so close that Killua heard it crystal clear. And still, he couldn't believe he had heard right.

"Wh-what?!"

"I said if I can k-"

"I heard it, idiot!" Suddenly he had no doubt about what Gon had said just before. How could this be happening? Had Gon noticed his staring at his lips and deduced what he wanted from it? Or maybe Gon also wanted it? No, that couldn't be. It was easy to understand why Gon had managed to take Killua’s attention little by little, and by now he was completely captivated by the tanned boy, in every sense of the word; but it was impossible that Gon could possibly feel the same way about him.

His mind was running wild and an intense blush came to his cheeks.

"Then... What do you say?"

Was it his imagination, or were their faces getting closer and closer? Killua's face was so hot it felt like it was about to explode.

"Wh-why would you suggest that?" Killua felt mortified, but he needed to understand. At that question, he saw the light flush that came to Gon’s cheeks, and he answered.

"Because I want to kiss you, and thought that maybe you might want it, too."

Their lips almost brushed at their last dialogue, and Killua felt Gon's warm breath on his cheeks.

It was hard to believe but Killua forced himself to it, because he couldn't take it anymore. If they stayed like this a second longer, so close and yet not enough, he felt he would go crazy.

With a little push of his head, Killua closed the little remaining distance between them and their lips finally met.

The kiss was a bit sudden and rough at first, but quickly softened its pace until their lips were slowly dancing against each other. Both were inexperienced to the art of kissing, but somehow, the moment their lips touched they knew exactly how to move against each other, as if they had always been waiting to meet. And it wasn't perfect, Killua knew they could do better with practice, but it was so soft and sweet, and Killua was melting inside. It was much better than he had imagined, and now that he knew how it felt, he didn't want the kiss to end.

He felt one hand cupping his cheek, and another caringly caressing his hair, and Gon's tender touches on him made him shiver. Almost in response, his arms flied to Gon's neck, holding him even closer against him and deepening the kiss.

They would keep kissing for hours, but unfortunately, breathing was a basic need and so they just separated when the lack of air in their lungs couldn't be avoided anymore. Still, their faces remained just an inch from each other, with just their mingled breaths in between. Both were blushing and slightly panting, but their mutual happiness revealed in the way their smiles appeared so genuine and wide on their faces.

"I like you, Killua. More than a friend or a best friend even. It's a deeper kind of like I never experienced before. You're so special to me."

"Yeah, I feel the same. I guess this is what it means having a soulmate, huh?" He asked, mostly to himself, as he retreated a bit his left hand to watch the mark on his wrist for the thousand time. He felt Gon doing the same with his own.

"Must be." Gon muttered under his breath, and his lips brushed with Killua's. Both noticed the light touch and their eyes flied to each other's lips, both of them thinking the same. "Can we kiss again?" Gon asked in a whisper, his hand still on Killua's hair resuming his caresses from before.

"You don't have to ask." Killua replied with a little smile.

And the moment the last sound left his mouth, Gon bent down and sealed their lips once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry but next chapter will be delayed for a week, because I have two big exams and I really need to focus on studying.
> 
> Anyway, this is one of the chapters I enjoyed writing the most, so I hope you liked reading it!! ^^


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know that I said there would be no chapter this week, but my university closed (as almost everything in my country) and we must stay in our houses, so I have now plenty of time and of course I'm going to use it to keep writing this story. So, here is the chapter. Enjoy! ^^

The first thing Gon saw that morning when he opened his eyes was Killua’s sleepy face, with relaxed features and purely white locks of hair splayed on the pillow, some of them tickling against his skin. He was already used to that first sight in the morning, after having slept in the same bed with Killua practically since the first day they knew each other, but what he wasn’t used to was to the almost lack of distance between them.

Their faces were only inches apart, noses almost bumping into each other and foreheads pressed together, having their hairs tangle in a white and black mess. Gon felt Killua’s arm loosely wrapped around his waist and their legs tangled together underneath the duvet. He couldn’t help the smile that instantly came to his lips; he was so happy to be that close to Killua, his soulmate. Now, they had realized that the word had a deeper meaning than they had first thought; it wasn’t just that they were friends or best friends, they were something more, and Gon loved the bond they both shared.

It had all come so naturally for Gon; how his feelings for Killua had slowly developed and deepened the more they got to know each other, and after all the kisses they shared yesterday and the warmth and happiness that invaded him at just the fact of waking up so close to Killua, the truth suddenly hit him. Now he knew for sure; he was in love with Killua.

Gon loved Killua, and he believed the feeling was mutual.

He couldn’t be happier, and a wide grin tugged at his lips. He suddenly felt the urge to wake the other, unable to contain that immense joy all to himself. He reached his hand forward and started gently caressing his soulmate’s pale cheek and hair. Gon felt how Killua welcomed the contact in his sleep, shifting the slightest bit towards the warmth of his palm over his skin – what Gon thought was adorable – but it didn’t serve to wake him up. An idea came to his mind, and with a playful smirk he tried a different approach.

He inched closer to the white haired boy and lightly pressed his lips against Killua’s cheek. As he received no response, Gon kept going, leaving a trace of butterfly kisses all over Killua’s face. From his cheek he moved to his temple, his eyelids, his forehead, and then down again to his nose and finally his lips. He started kissing just the corners of his lips, and by then, he noticed Killua was already awake, as he felt him form a little smile under his lips, what far from making him stop just encouraged him to keep going.

He moved just a little to the left to have full access to Killua’s lips and finally gave him a proper kiss in the lips. As the many others before, it was light, sweet and short, just a peck, but the moment their lips separated he came back for another kiss, and another and another. Gon felt Killua waking more and more with each new kiss, until most of his sleepiness left him and he finally started kissing him back.

The kisses started lasting longer and longer, their lips meeting with each new breath and moving together at a slow pace. But his lips ended up betraying him, as after so many kisses that he had long lost count of them, he couldn’t contain the growing happiness in his chest anymore and a smile formed on his face in the middle of a kiss, keeping him from kissing Killua anymore. Gon felt Killua also smiling against his lips, and after a moment they finally separated and stared at each other.

“Good morning, Killua.” He let out in a soft and low voice.

“Morning Gon.” The other replied in a whisper, his voice still sleepy, and Gon felt how Killua’s arm, which was still around him, tightened a little, holding him close. At that Gon giggled a little, and noting the lovely expression on Killua’s features, he couldn’t resist the urge to playfully peck him on the tip of his nose, he smiled and then nuzzled even closer to him, burying his head on the crook of Killua’s neck and hugging him tight. Killua received him more than welcomed and stretched him against his chest, their bodies now impossibly close.

Gon relaxed in Killua’s arms, to the point that he almost fell asleep again. It was so calm and pleasant, feeling Killua’s rhythmic breaths in sync with his owns and taking in the boy’s scent in his nostrils. He didn’t want to move at all.

After a while of staying like this, just tightly holding onto each other, Killua finally talked.

“Mh. Gon, we should get up, it’s already late.” Though he didn’t make any effort to do as he said.

At that, Gon only snuggled closer to Killua and replied with a muffled voice.

“Doesn’t matter. Alluka is still asleep, so it’s okay if we stay like this for a while longer.”

“Actually, I’ve been awake for a while.” A third voice sounded on the room, completely surprising them.

Gon felt how Killua tensed next to him, just a moment before he quickly sat up on the bed, letting him with a strange sense of coldness and missing the other’s touch and closeness.

“Alluka! Wh-why didn’t you say anything?!” Killua asked the girl in the other bed of the room, completely flustered and with color rising to his cheeks.

“Because you were in a totally lovey-dovey mode and I didn’t want to ruin your morning. And finally! It was about time you two realized your feelings and the meaning behind the marks. You were totally pining on each other almost since the moment I first saw you together. Can I say how cute you are together? Because you are, and Nanika totally agrees with it!” Alluka said in a rush, almost without breathing, in a bit exasperated but mostly cheerful tone. “But yeah, I think you were right, onii-chan. It’s quite late, so we should get up and finally go to explore the city.” And with that, she didn’t say anything more and locked herself in the bathroom to get ready for the day.

Gon felt his cheeks warming a little; that had been unexpected and quite embarrassing, but he was glad Alluka now knew about their new relationship and that she was happy with it. He turned to Killua, who was trying to cover his furiously flushed face with his hands, and Gon couldn’t help but chuckle a little at the view. He also sat up on the bed and reached forward to Killua, taking his pale hands on his own and lowering them to reveal the other’s cute face.

“It’s okay, Killua. She had to find out one way or another.”

“I know, just- not like this!”

“Aw, come on, it wasn’t that bad.”

“It was.”

“Now, don’t be such a baby.” Gon replied as his hands flied to Killua’s cheeks and lightly squeezed them, before leaning in and planting a small kiss on his forehead. “Better?”

“Mh.” And Gon knew him well enough to interpret that as yes.

“Okay, so let’s get ready!”

Killua didn’t even have time to reply, as Gon quickly got up from the bed and dragged him out of it by their joined hands.

~

The city they were currently in wasn’t one of the biggest or most important ones of the country. On the contrary, it was more like a small and charming town, old but colorful houses with lots of trees and plants in between, and narrow streets lined with stone pavers. That rural and natural style somehow reminded Gon of his home at Whale Island, making him feel completely at ease in that place.

The three of them had been walking through those streets for a while now, entertaining themselves looking at the different stalls of the market that was taking place that day in the city. Alluka was quickly infected by the lively atmosphere and was always a bit ahead of them, flying from one stall to another, admiring everything that was on display, from the simplest and humblest clothes to the most beautiful and expensive jewels.

Instead, Gon and Killua moved more slowly through the market, taking their time to look at everything that caught their attention, but always careful not to lose the girl from their sight. At some point, Gon had taken Killua’s hand in his, just because he loved to feel the other’s touch, and now that he knew Killua also liked it, he didn’t hesitate or stop himself from it, like it would have happened a few days ago. Killua seemed a bit surprised at the touch for the very first second, probably because of the environment and all the people around them, but after seeing Gon’s cheerful grin, he quickly returned the smile and laced their fingers together with a light squeak.

Nearly at the end of the street, Gon saw Alluka waiting for them in a bench, eating some of the chocolates Killua had bought for them in one of the previous stalls. He was about to tell Killua they should finish quickly and join her, when he caught sight of a familiar silhouette from the corner of his eye. Gon turned and looked directly at the person in question; a short boy with tanned skin and brown hair. And although he was taller than Gon remembered and wasn’t wearing his usual karate clothes, he recognized him from the first moment.

“Zushi!” Gon shouted to catch his attention and ran to meet him, pulling Killua with him by their joined hands.

The short boy turned at the sound of his name, and a smile tugged at his lips at the sight of his friend.

“Gon! It’s been a longtime, what a surprise to see you here!”

“Yeah, same goes here. I didn’t expect to find you in this place!”

“Well, since I’ve been improving a lot my Nen lately, Wing-san let me have a little break from my training, so I’ve returned home for some days to visit my parents, because it had been ages since I last saw them.”

“That’s great! So you grew up here? What a coincidence! We are now visiting the city- Oh, sorry I forgot.” He turned to Killua, who seemed a bit uncomfortable in the situation at hand. “Killua, this is Zushi, a friend I made during my training at Heavens Arena; and Zushi, this is Killua, my best friend and soulmate!” The younger boy was confused at the last word, and started questioning what a soulmate was, but Killua cut him off, as he asked at the same time.

“You two have been at Heavens Arena? I also fought there as a part of my training.”

“Really?!” Zushi seemed to forget about his previous question and now took a different interest on Killua. “Which was the highest floor you reached? Wait, now that I think about it, I know all of the opponents that have battled there in the last years, but I don’t remember seeing you.”

“Well, you can’t possibly recognize me because I started fighting in Heavens Arena ten years ago, when I was six. It took me two years, but I managed to reach floor 200. After that, I just retired.”

“What?! I just reached floor 200 a couple of months ago, after more than four years of intense training…” His first unbelievable expression quickly turned into a deflated one.

“Onii-chan, Gon, what is taking you so long?” Alluka approached them, and it was then that he noticed Zushi’s presence. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t know you were talking with someone else. Hi, I’m Alluka!”

“He-hello, my name is Zuchi.” The young boy stuttered, suddenly nervous about Alluka’s presence.

“Zuchi? That’s a curious name. I’ve never heard it before.” It was just then that Zushi realized his mistake, and he replied with cheeks now flushing a bright red.

“No! Sorry, not Zuchi. It’s Zushi.”

“Okay, Zushi then. You’re so funny.” Alluka smiled at him and a couple of giggles escaped from her lips, what only served to make Zushi blush harder. And Gon normally didn’t notice these things, but from the way his friend was looking at Alluka and his colored cheeks, it was pretty obvious to him that Zushi liked Killua’s sister. And he knew Killua had realized too, as his look on Zushi noticeably sharpened, though the boy in question was too flustered to notice. “So you are from here? Maybe you can show us the rest of the city!” Alluka proposed, as she reached closer to Zushi and linked her arm with his.

Both of them stopped and remained silent for a moment, and in that short period of time, it seemed as if they were frozen on their places, their bodies still and their eyes widening. Gon didn’t understand what had happened, but something seemed to be going on. A light gasp sounded at his side, and the moment later Killua let go of Gon’s hand and quickly approached the other two. He rapidly took his sister’s hands in his and exposed her wrists, and a little surprised sound escaped from the girl’s lips, this time.

On her immaculate porcelain skin there was now a mark that hadn’t been there before.


	14. Chapter 14

Killua couldn't believe what he was seeing in that moment; or, more like he didn't want to admit what was happening. It couldn't be that that boy he had known for a couple of minutes was his sister's soulmate, and yet, the marks on their wrists indicated otherwise.

Seeing Zushi and Alluka freeze the moment they first touched reminded him of the time Gon and him brushed fingers for the first time, in which he felt an overwhelming feeling involving him entirely that made him stop just the same way as it was happening in front of him. And it was then that he realized that maybe, it was happening to his sister what had happened to him some days ago.

He rushed to her side and forcefully took Alluka's hands in his, making the inside of her wrists visible to everyone. And there, in her right wrist, just as he feared, a mark had appeared. Just as the flame on his wrist, a headband drawing showed on the girl's pale skin. Killua was so stupefied that he didn't hear Alluka's surprised gasp and the enthusiastic comments from her that followed behind.

The truth was he had never thought this day would come. Killua had already assumed that from now on, it would be the three of them, just him with the two people in the world he loved the most; his precious little sister and his wonderful best friend and soulmate. And that was just perfect to Killua. But now, that perfection was going to be ruined by the appearance of that mark.

In Killua's eyes, that mark only meant one thing; his sister was going to be taken away from him. He was sure that Alluka would take a great interest in her finally found soulmate, and so he could see his relationship with her slowly fading as the one with the short boy got stronger. And maybe, if this had happened some years later, he wouldn't have minded that much; but it had been just a bit more than a couple of weeks since they escaped from their family’s mansion and he still felt it hadn't been enough to compensate for all the time they had been denied to see and talk to each other as much as they wanted. Everything was happening so fast, and Killua wasn't even near to be ready to confront this situation. Also, he didn't know much about that boy either, and the obvious crush he seemed to have on his sister didn't help Zushi to gain Killua's trust.

He knew he wasn't being fair with Alluka. He just wanted her to be happy, and if Zushi was even just a fifth of a good soulmate as Gon was for him, he had no doubt that his sister would be fully delighted the rest of her life. However, he couldn't help but feel reticent for the situation at hand.

A warm hand that he knew very well by now landed on his shoulder, and just the tender touch of it managed to ease Killua a little. It seemed to always have that effect on him, no matter the situation, Gon's presence at his side and his soft touch on his skin was always comforting.

He sighed and relieved the tension he didn't notice that was building up on him, and he focused again on the present. Alluka had somehow escaped from his brother's grasp and she was now next to Zushi, both admiring with curious eyes their new marks. On the boy's wrist, there was a drawing of two smiley faces, not identical but one with eyes and mouth slightly wider than the other, and Killua couldn't help but smile a little at the view, because he understood what it meant; it represented both Alluka and Nanika, and he was glad that the latter hadn't been left behind.

"S-so, why did you say that these marks have appeared on our wrists?" Zushi asked Alluka, still a bit flustered, but not as nervous as before.

"It means we are soulmates!" She cheerfully replied.

"And what does that mean? What is a soulmate?" The young boy questioned in confusion, gaining a bit more of confidence with each new word he said.

"Ah... That's a bit long to explain, so maybe I can do that while you show me the rest of the city." The girl proposed with a wide smile.

"Wait, 'show you'? I thought we were going together." The detail hadn't gone unnoticed by Killua and was sure his sister had said it deliberately. What he had feared before was already happening, and now concern and a sad feeling invaded him again.

"Sorry onii-chan, but you should know better than anyone why I want some time alone with Zushi, _my soulmate_." An apologetic smile appeared on her lips, and Killua felt his cheeks slightly warming.

"S-still, I don't want you to be alone with a stranger."

"Zushi is not a stranger, Killua. He is my friend and I can tell he is very nice. You don't have anything to worry about; Alluka will be on perfect hands!" Gon added, on his friend’s defense.

"Well, he is a stranger to Alluka and me, so I am not happy with the idea of leaving them alone." Killua deadpanned, not giving in so easily.

"But onii-chan, he is my soulmate, and do I have to remind you that that was exactly what you did when you met Gon? I also want it!"

"Th-that! That was different!" Now Killua was blushing hard and his mind went blank with reasons to tell her.

"Aw, come on Killua, let them spend the rest of the day together. It's good for Alluka to meet new people, and especially if they are soulmates they have the right to have some time together. After all, we will be leaving this place in a couple of days, and it will be a while before they can see each other again."

"But-"

"Yeah, Gon is right. Please, onii-chan!" And before he could even think about it, she added. "You can also take advantage of this situation! Now, you can have some time with Gon just to yourself, so you can finally go on a date together!"

"Wha-?!" His face turned even redder at his sister’s remark.

At Alluka’s suggestion and Killua's reaction, Gon couldn't contain the laugher. He took Killua's hands in his and he replied, looking directly at his eyes.

"Now I really want to split up; let Alluka and Zushi go through the city and let's have a date together, Killua!"

Killua's lips pressed into a thin line, and he'd like to say he was only considering it, but the truth was, he had already given in, just he didn't want to admit it yet. Although he still didn't quite like the idea of the two young teens alone together, he knew that what Gon had said before was true and recognized that it wasn't fair for Alluka to deny her this.

Also, he was weak when it came to Gon, and the idea of getting to go on a date with him had finally convinced him. Since all their kissing from the previous day, he had waited eagerly for the moment the two of them could be alone again, and now the plan of going on a date sounded wonderful to Killua.

He let out a sigh, and with a smile directed to Gon, he agreed with a nod. His soulmate's face lit up from happiness and Gon reached forward and planted a sweet kiss on his cheek. It was a bit embarrassing, since Alluka and Zushi were still there, but he didn't care that much because of the excitement and anticipation welling up inside him. His focus was on their laced hands and the caramel eyes lovingly staring at his own.

The sound of someone clearing his throat took him back to reality, and Killua turned to see Zushi looking at him with a serious expression.

"I will protect Alluka with my life, and I won't let anything bad happen to her. I promise!"

"Yeah, you better..." He muttered, trying to sound a little menacing, and it worked, because the short boy adopted the same nervous expression from before.

"Onii-chan, don't intimidate him!" Alluka scolded him. She just huffed one more time and turned to Zushi. She linked her arm in his elbow, and again with a happy expression, she said a quick goodbye to the boys and disappeared in the crowd, dragging Zushi with her. And although he had finally agreed to it, Killua couldn't help the concerned look on his eyes, still staring at the place where the two young teens have left.

"It's okay, Killua. Zushi is a good boy, so you have nothing to worry about. And if they have any problems, Alluka has her phone, so they can just call us, and we can call them at any moment as well, if you want."

Killua's gaze returned to Gon in an instant, and it took little effort for him to forget about his sister and focus on the boy in front of him. A genuine smile showed on his lips, and with a squeak of his hands, he just said.

"Right now, I only want to go on that date with you."

Gon instantly returned the smile back to him, and with nothing more to say, they lost themselves in the picturesque city.

~

Killua curled his toes and buried them in the soft sand, making sure to take in the moment at hand. It was almost the end of the day, and Gon and he had just found a small and deserted beach to stay and end their date in the best possible way. Sitting on the sand, with Gon’s arm around his waist and Killua’s head laying on the other’s shoulder, the two of them were silently staring at the big sun setting on the horizon, bathing with red and orange hues the entire place.

Just as the day was coming to its end, Killua recalled in his head all the wonderful moments he had shared with Gon during their date. They mostly just walked around, stopping a couple of times in between to have something quick to lunch and buy a pair of ice-creams some time later. It had been simple, but fun, nothing out of the ordinary, but it had been very special for Killua, just because it had only been the two of them.

And this moment, was definitely his favorite of the whole day. A moment of peace and comfortable silence, in which their bodies touching and the beautiful view in front of them was everything that mattered to them and nothing needed to be said. It was just perfect, and Killua almost hoped that the sun stopped its way hiding out of their view so that they could stay forever like this.

Of course, the planet didn’t stop its rotation just because of Killua wanting it, and soon enough the sun fully set on the horizon, taking its light away with him, as darkness started falling on them and thousands of stars slowly appeared on the night sky.

And it was then that Gon decided to finally talk.

“Say Killua. Do you have any plans for the future? Something you’ve always wanted to do?”

“Mh. Not really. The only thing I’ve ever wanted was have a normal and simple life with Alluka, far from our family, and I’ve finally got it. That and your presence at my side is everything I need; there is nothing else I want. I’m already happy with what I have.” A little smile tugged at the corners of his lips; if someone had told him a month ago this was going to be his life from now on, he wouldn’t have believed it. This freedom, this happiness… he didn’t even dare to dream about when he was still imprisoned by his family’s orders, and now, fantasy had turned into reality.

He took Gon’s hand caringly in his and started distractedly stroking his knuckles, one by one, in smooth movements.

“What about you?”

“I’ve only had one objective in life since the moment I took the Hunter exam, and that’s finding my father. But I’m still far from it.” Gon added, sounding a little deflated.

“You’ll find him, I know it. Alluka and I will help you.” And he reinforced his promise by holding Gon’s hand a bit tighter on his.

“Thank you, Killua.” And just from the tone of his voice, Killua knew that he really meant it.

Silence fell upon them once again, as their gaze lingered in the scenery in front of them; the dark blue and purple sky above their heads and the twinkling stars awakening on it reflecting on the calm surface of the sea.

After a moment, Killua finally lifted his head from his soulmate’s shoulder and looked in his direction, as if to ask what they were doing now, and he was met with caramel eyes shining under the moonlight already staring at him. When Gon felt his gaze was returned, his eyes softened and his hands flied to cup the other’s cheeks, and Killua could feel the warmth irradiating from them against his skin.

Unconsciously, their faces were getting closer and closer until their foreheads pressed together and their lips were almost touching. A feeling he was already used by now warmed Killua’s being at Gon’s closeness. It had made him nervous and confused before, but now it was pleasant, comforting and felt totally right; like there was where he belonged, and there was no other place he’d rather be in that moment.

And somehow, their closeness soon seemed to be not enough. The few inches separating them felt now so many, and Killua just wanted to close the little remaining distance between their faces and make their lips meet again. He had been waiting through all the date for this moment, and now that it came he had to stop himself from giving in so quickly, because there was something he needed to say first.

Gon was always the first to talk about his feelings, always the one to take the first step. Gon always talked so honestly and openly to him, so it was now his turn. Gon needed to know. It probably wouldn’t be much of a surprise to him, considering their relationship development in the last days, but he really needed to take these feelings out of his chest and put them into words. It wouldn’t be easy for Killua, because he wasn’t used to this kind of conversations, but he wanted to let Gon know just how much he meant for him, how much he had changed his life, how much he loved him.

“Gon…”

“Killua.” The other replied, with such a tender tone and a soft expression that it made a shiver go down his spine.

He felt at a loss of words for a moment, not knowing how to express everything he was feeling. And then, the solution hit him; there were only three words he needed. Three simple words that contained everything he wanted to make Gon know.

He opened his mouth, ready to finally say what he wanted. It felt like the perfect time and the perfect place for it. It felt like nothing could go wrong at all.

Except, it did.

Before Killua was able to breathe the first word of his short confession, everything shattered to pieces at the sound of a voice he had hoped he’d never hear again.

“I finally found you, Killu.”


	15. Chapter 15

That voice, Killua knew exactly who it belonged to, and the moment he heard it, he froze in his place for a second, unable to process what was happening. He felt his heart skip a beat, and he almost forgot how to breathe. His face went instantly pale and the panicked look that was forming on his eyes seemed to make Gon understand the situation at hand.

The tanned boy was the first to break their eye contact and redirect his, now determined and furious gaze, to the person that had just interrupted them. Killua, instead, remained completely still. He knew who he’d find if he turned around to where the voice sounded, and honestly, he didn’t think he could take it. He thought he had already escaped from his past and left his family for good. He thought he could live now the life he had always wanted with Gon and Alluka by his side; and even if the possibility of Illumi finding them had always been a threat, with the passing days, he had grown calmer and more confident that they were truly safe, and therefore, he had almost forgotten about it.

He thought everything was now perfect; everything seemed like a dream come true. So he just didn’t want to turn around and find out the person who was going to ruin everything and make it look like it had all been just an illusion, practically before it even started.

“Killu, it’s rude of you not to greet your big brother, especially when he has been keeping track of you for so long.” Killua tensed at the sound of Illumi speaking once again, but still, he didn’t move a muscle. In front of him, he saw Gon shifting closer to him, as if trying to protect him from his brother, and he firmly declared.

“He doesn’t have to talk to you if he doesn’t want to.”

“Of course he does, _Gon._ I’m his big brother after all.”

Illumi had pronounced Gon’s name that menacingly that a new wave of panic invaded him, and made him remember why Illumi was there; to kill Gon. Killua was now utterly terrified, but after all the wonderful moments Gon and he had shared together, he was determined not to let him go. It wouldn’t happen like in his nightmare. This time, he would stand up for Gon until the end.

After taking a deep breath, Killua finally turned around and focused his eyes on the tall and slim figure a few meters in front of him, as he also moved a bit forward to be now the one blocking Illumi’s way to his soulmate. He made his best to make his well-trained murderous glare appear on his eyes, and with a menacing tone he replied.

“Don’t you dare do anything to him.”

Illumi’s features remained as expressionless as ever.

“I didn’t come for Gon. I did at first, but now it’s too late. The curse has been working for too long. If I kill your ‘deathmate’ now, it will mean the death for you, as well. So it’s not worth it. We need you, Killu.”

That took Killua completely out of hand. His brother had made very clear his intent on killing Gon, and now he said it was useless? Although, thinking about it, it made sense with what Illumi had told him about the ‘deathmates’, as he called them. He realized that what he had wanted was just killing Gon before the two of them got too attached to each other, and now, having failed on that part, he believed he couldn’t kill Gon without killing Killua, either. At least, that was one less problem to think about.

“Instead, I’m more interested in our little brother. Where is he, Killu? I thought he’d be glued to you all the time. So, where are you hiding him?”

Tension started welling up inside Killua again. Of course, even if Illumi wasn’t after Gon now, he had still followed them in order to bring Alluka and him back to the mansion and just trap them in there as they were before.

Now, he was extremely glad they had found Zushi before in the morning and went separate ways for the rest of the day.

“You’re dreaming if you think I’m telling you where _she_ is!” He shouted with more determination than he actually felt. His brother didn’t seem impressed though, he just closed his eyes for a moment before replying.

“I thought you’d say that. You leave me no choice, then.”

Before Killua could process what was happening, Illumi disappeared from his view and he sensed movement and heard a muffled scream behind him. He turned around the fastest he could, but it was already late. What he found was a scene taken out from his nightmares.

His brother was a few meters in front of him, with Gon trapped in his arms and a needle pointing at his neck. Killua felt his knees going week and his heart started bumping violently in his chest.

This couldn’t be happening.

But this time, it wasn’t a dream. He had to be strong; if he let the panic get through him, he wouldn’t be able to save Gon. The tanned boy was already doing everything he could to free himself from Illumi, aiming his elbows at his head, and his feet kicking the other’s legs with all the strength he could muster, but it only served to annoy Illumi and make him completely immobilize Gon in his grip.

“Get off me!” Gon angrily shouted as he continued squirming, but to no avail, since Illumi didn’t allow him to move even an inch.

Unable to tolerate the view in front of him anymore, Killua stood up straight and clenched his fists at his sides, before he said.

“What are you doing?! You said you weren’t after Gon, so leave him alone!”

“What I said before is true. I’m not going to kill him, it’s just not worthy. But maybe this can serve as an incentive to make you tell me and do what I want.”

At the last sentence, Illumi pierced Gon’s skin just the slightest bit enough to make a thin trail of blood go down his neck. Gon, who had been trying with all his strength to free himself from Illumi, paralyzed in that moment. Now, rage was making its way in Killua’s heart, as the first initial fear started fading away. If Illumi wasn’t going to kill Gon, then that meant he was planning on torturing him until he talked, and there was no way Killua would let his soulmate experience the same pain he had gone through all these years.

He started thinking of a way to liberate Gon from his brother’s claws. Attacking Illumi with his electricity was out of question, since he couldn't risk hurting Gon in the process, but maybe if he used his Godspeed, he’ll be able to surprise Illumi and take Gon away with him. It was worth a try-

A sharp pain suddenly stung in Killua’s head, followed by a voice.

_‘That’s not a good idea. Illumi is way stronger than you, and you know it. Even with your Godspeed, you won’t deceive him; you’ll just annoy him, and you know how he gets when he is upset. Do you really want to risk Gon’s wellbeing? It’s safer to just do as he says’._

Killua frowned; where did that thought come from? Even if it was true he didn’t want Gon getting hurt, he’ll never think anything like that, as he’ll never sell his sisters that way.

No, he’ll stick with his plan.

But before he could move a single muscle, the pain returned to his head, now with double force. A little gasp escaped from his lips, and the voice from before sounded again in his head, now more convincing and suggestive.

_‘Do as Illumi says. You are weak, you have no chances to beat him or even leave him behind. So just tell him where Alluka is and return home with him, where you truly belong.’_

Killua raised his hands to his hair and shook violently his head, as a way to not let those venomous words get through him. That was wrong. Killua knew where he belonged, and it wasn’t with that people, it was with-

A third wave of pain hit him inside his head, even stronger than the previous ones. This time, the pain was so intense that his knees shook under his weight and he fell over them on the sand. He heard Gon’s voice in the distance shouting his name, but was hardly aware of it, as all his head was filled with was that insistent and loud voice.

_‘Just return home with Alluka. There is no other place in the world for you two. Go back with your family, where you have always belonged. Everything you have lived in the outside was just a lie.’_

As it talked, the voice seemed to be closing his mind and bottling his senses. Killua was reticent to believe it at first, but the voice sounded so convincing that it had to be telling the truth. It was… the best option to do.

With a lowered head, he slowly opened his mouth to answer his brother’s question, when a loud yell made him come to his senses.

“DON’T DO IT, KILLUA!”

The voice sounded desperate and familiar, and just as it said, Killua stopped, because he felt something terribly wrong would happen if he didn’t do as told. The moment later, he lifted his head and found the source of it, struggling against his brother’s arms to free himself. His mouth had also been covered now, to keep him from talking to Killua anymore.

Gon.

Of course, how could he forget? He had to liberate him from Illumi.

He realized what he had been about to do and he understood everything. That hadn’t been him. That voice in his head, urging him to respond to Illumi’s wishes, it had been one of his brother’s tricks.

The pain returned to his head once again and Killua noticed it was especially intense right behind his forehead. Now he knew that was also one of Illumi’s dirty tricks on him, so he didn’t let it affect him. And knowing his brother’s specialty, maybe could it be…?

Without hesitation, Killua turned his hand into a sharp claw and pulled it inside his forehead, looking for the needle he had no doubt he would found. Indeed, his fingers soon brushed the sharp and thin metal, and he immediately pulled it out of his head in a fast move.

Now that Illumi was unable to control him through that needle he didn’t know he had stuck in the brain, Killua felt free and confident. He had finally got rid of all those fears and insecurities that always came to him in the worst moments. Now, Illumi wouldn’t manipulate him as he wished ever again.

A smirk crossed his lips as he broke the needle in half and threw it to the sand, all without leaving his eyes from his brother. He was delighted to see that Illumi seemed a little surprised at least. He was sure his brother hadn’t imagined he would figure about his secret needle on him, so that was a victory on Killua’s side. And he was determined not to let it be the only one.

Fast as lighting, Killua activated his Godspeed and rushed to Illumi to take Gon away from him. But it seemed he had underestimated his brother. After all, it was true that Illumi was stronger than him.

Illumi just dodged him, Gon still trapped in his arms and unable to move. He lifted an eyebrow and said with his usual monotone voice.

“I’m surprised that you noticed about the hidden needle and that you even managed to get rid of it. But just for that don’t think you can defeat me so easily, that you can defeat me at all, because you can’t. And deep down, you already know it.”

That kind of comments didn’t scare Killua anymore, instead they just made him furious and wanting to prove him wrong. He’ll do anything to save Gon, now he had no doubt of it.

He launched forward, but every time he was about to take Gon, Illumi managed to dodge him and avoid it. Gon squirming on his brother’s grip made it a bit difficult for Illumi to move as freely as he’d wanted, so Killua almost made it a couple of times, but in the end, he only managed to brush his soulmate’s clothes with the tips of his fingers. He hissed a curse in frustration, but didn’t give up and just kept trying again and again.

“Now, Killu. I’m getting tired of this. Tell me where is him and return home, and then I’ll let your ‘deathmate’ free. It’s a fair deal.”

“That’s not fair at all! I’m not letting you be any near Alluka ever again, and we are never getting back to that house.”

Illumi let out a little sigh, but his features remained expressionless.

“I didn’t want to come to this, but I guess you leave me no choice.”

His brother made such a fast move that Killua didn’t know what was happening until he felt the needle stuck on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry, this needle is just like a sleeping pill; it will work in a few seconds, so listen carefully now, Killu. As I see that you’re not willing to come with me with our brother, I propose you another deal. I’m returning home now, and I’m bringing Gon with me. We’ll only free him once you and our brother have returned home. Both of you. And you’d better come soon, because I won’t stop Milluki from having a new punching bag. It’s up to you.”

“You-!” Killua tried to take a step closer to the other two, but then his vision became blurry and the ground beneath his feet seemed to start moving. Unable to keep standing for a second longer, he fell on his knees to the sand.

“Killua!” He heard Gon shouting, and for a brief moment in which his vision cleared again, he saw him struggling furiously against Illumi, but to no avail. He kept screaming his name, as well as other things he couldn’t manage to understand due to the dizziness that was welling up inside him. He tried to stand up, but all his forces abandoned him in that moment and he just fell flat on the sand.

So that was it.

There was nothing more he could do.

He gritted his teeth and curled his fingers inside the sand in frustration at his own weakness.

“G-gon, I’m so sorry. I’ll come and save you, I-I promise.” He assured him in a low but determined voice.

His vision cleared again for just a second, and let him see Gon, now immobile on his brother’s arms, probably because of the needle that was stuck in his shoulder, as the one in his own. He had tears on his eyes and falling over his sun-kissed cheeks. He was also shouting something that Killua didn’t make. Gon looked so sad and desperate, like Killua had never seen him before, and it was all because of him.

It was all his fault.

With that last image and thought on mind, everything turned black and he fell into unconsciousness.


	16. Chapter 16

The sound of the waves crashing against the rocks and the first sunbeams of the new day on his body made Killua finally wake up. At first, he felt completely disorientated, not being able to remember why he was in that small and deserted beach. He sat up and started to get rid of the sand that annoyingly lingered against his skin and dirtied his hair. And it was then that he noticed the needle still stuck on his shoulder, and all the memories from the day before instantly returned to his mind.

With trembling hands he removed the needle from his skin and dropped it to the sand. He didn’t want to believe it, but he knew he couldn’t escape from the terrible truth; his brother had kidnapped Gon.

His breath fastened, and still, not enough air reached his lungs. What had he done? This was his entire fault. If he had been stronger, if he had been faster, if he had been smarter, nothing of all this would have happened.

A ringing melody sounded from his pocket and startled Killua for a moment. He took his phone out and stared at the name showing on the incoming call, what somehow eased him a little. He inhaled and exhaled deeply a few times to calm his breaths a bit before answering the call.

“Hi Alluka.”

“Onii-chan!” She screamed through the speaker, way louder than it was needed, and Killua flinched at the high voice. “Where are you?! I’ve called you like a hundred times since yesterday night but you never answered the phone, and Zushi and I went to the hotel room and you weren’t there either, and I was so so worried. Are you and Gon okay?”

“Sorry Alluka. Something happened.” He paused for a second, wondering if he should tell her in that moment, but decided that it could wait until they reunite again. “Could you- could you come here? Sorry but I don’t really know where I am or how to go back to the hotel.” After everything that had happened, it was impossible for him to remember the many streets they had crossed to arrive to that particular place.

“O-of course, just tell me where you are and we’ll be there in a moment. But… why do you talk like you are alone? Isn´t Gon with you, onii-chan?” She asked the last part cautiously, almost with fear, like she didn´t want to hear the answer.

Killua waited for a few seconds before answering, with a low and defeated voice.

“He isn´t.”

“Wha-?!”

“Please Alluka, just- not now. I’ll tell you what happened when you come.”

He heard the girl made some little sounds through the speaker, like she wanted to protest, but she finally sighed and replied.

“Don’t worry onii-chan, we’ll be there in no time. Just don’t stress yourself too much in the meantime, okay?”

“Mh, I’ll try.” He whispered with a little smile, the one that only his sister could make him do in even the worst moments.

After a quick description of the place, Alluka consulted it with Zushi, still by her side, and soon guessed where her brother was. They exchanged a few words more and then said goodbye, with the promise that Alluka and Zushi would be there within minutes.

Killua lowered the phone as the call ended and just stared absentmindedly to the sand. The morning sea breeze ruffled his hair and white bangs covered his eyes, but he didn’t care. The air that yesterday created such a perfect atmosphere was now way too humid for his liking, but he didn’t care. The sand that had felt so soft beneath his bare feet the day before now was still annoyingly glued to his skin, but he didn’t care at all. He couldn’t care about all those minor and unimportant details when something so much worse had happened before his eyes and he hadn’t been able to stop it.

He didn’t know how much time he spent like this, glaring at the sand with a blank stare in the eyes and too overwhelmed that he wasn’t able to think of anything, but at some moment he felt a small and gentle hand on his shoulder. He hadn’t even heard her approaching, a sign of how out of himself he was feeling in that moment. He looked up at the same time as Alluka tried to cover his worried expression with a reassuring smile, but ended up looking more like a sad one. Still, Killua appreciated the gesture. Zushi was also there, remaining a bit behind from his sister, trying to appear collected and failing with the concerned look that showed on his eyes.

Alluka took his hands with both of hers.

“Come on; let’s go home onii-chan.” She murmured before she pulled his hands to make him stand up.

He did as told and let her guide him out of the beach and through the narrow streets of the city, to a place he didn’t know where and didn’t ask either, but that definitely wasn’t home, because Illumi had just stole it from him.

~

“N-no, it can’t be true…” Alluka whispered and her hands flied to her mouth, adding to the horrified expression that was showing on her face after Killua told her and Zushi everything that had happened. Even the short boy at her side had gone pale and looked very worried for his kidnapped friend.

But at that moment, Killua was so devastated that he just felt empty. His gaze remained all the time on the same spot on the table they were sitting at. He told the events from the previous day with difficulty, as they were still too fresh on his mind, but his voice was low and plain all through it. No sadness, no rage on it, just emptiness and the barest tinge of disbelief on it.

A few minutes passed in silence, the two young teens taking in everything he had just told them and Killua not in the mood to keep talking anymore.

In the end, it was Alluka who decided to talk first.

“If- if it is the only way, then I guess we should come back-“

“No, don’t even say it!” Killua snapped coming back to reality, because really, that was the last thing he needed to hear in that moment. “That is definitely out of question; you are not going back to that house. Not after how terribly bad they have treated you all these years.”

“But-“

“I said no!”

“But I don’t want Gon to suffer because of me!” Alluka blurted loudly, almost shouting, as she stood up, hands on the table and eyes shut with force. But she soon began to tremble and even through her closed eyelids, her eyes started watering. She opened then her eyes, bluer and brighter than usual due to the tears emerging on them.

“Gon hasn’t done anything wrong, and he has absolutely no relation with our family. So just, why? This situation, it’s not fair at all for him! If anyone sh-should be trapped in that mansion… that’s m-me.” Now tears were running uncontrollably through her face and all her efforts to wipe them off were in vain, as more and more tears replaced the old ones.

“Alluka, that’s not true! Don’t ever think you shouldn’t have left that place, because that’s wrong.”

“But this- this wouldn’t have happened if I never left my room…” Alluka added between sobs.

“It’s not-“Killua started but just then, he was cut off by Zushi standing up and holding her shoulders ever so gently. The girl turned now to him, still crying and sniffing and unable to stop.

“There’s no use of thinking on the ‘what ifs’. I don’t entirely understand everything about your family, but I know one thing for sure, and it’s that you and your brother have no fault in all this.” He stopped a moment to caringly wipe the tears out of her face, and then continued. “We can’t change the past but maybe we can do something to change the future at hand.”

One more single tear escaped from her eye and her lips twitched the slightest in a small sad smile.

“Thank you, Zushi.” She answered softly, and the tanned boy’s cheeks turned a bit red. “I just- I need a moment.” Alluka took Zushi’s hands on her shoulders and gave them a light squeak before leaving the room.

The two boys remained there, and silence fell over them. A few minutes passed, until Killua said out of the blue.

“I know I should have said it before but, thank you for having taken care of Alluka.”

“It-it’s nothing.” The boy in question replied, a bit flustered. And Killua must have had a pretty bad face on, because Zushi quickly added. “If you also want some time alone I can show you one of the guest rooms.”

“Yeah, thank you.”

He followed Zushi up the stairs of his small house until reaching the last door in the corridor.

“Here it is. Alluka used the next room yesterday, so I guess she is there, just so you know. If you need me I’ll be downstairs.”

Killua just nodded, but it seemed as Zushi wanted to say something more, so he waited. Hesitantly, the tanned boy asked.

“Is Gon… your boyfriend?”

Killua thought about it for a moment and answered the most honestly he could, because he wasn’t in the mood to make his brain overwork with that simple question, as he knew he would have done in different circumstances.

“We’ve never used that word before but, I guess you could say so.”

Zushi just nodded, like he perfectly understood, and added.

“Don’t worry Killua, we’ll find a way to bring him back, I’m sure of it.”

Killua just smiled lightly, a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, and without the strength to say anything more he turned into the room and closed the door behind him.

He didn’t think it twice and plumped on the bed, waiting for sleep to come. But it just didn’t. Even though he felt mentally exhausted, he just couldn’t relax enough to fall asleep.

He didn’t know how much time had passed when he heard the door opening and closing quietly and the bed sinking a little at the weight of someone else sitting on it. A few minutes passed and finally he acknowledged his sister’s presence by turning around and looking at her, now dry and understanding, sky blue eyes.

Killua sat on the bed, to be now on her same eyelevel, and took one of her small hands in his.

“How are you?”

“I’m better.” The girl answered with a reassuring smile. But it quickly disappeared as she added. “I’m sorry if it made it look like I wanted to return to my old room after you’ve worked so hard to take me and Nanika out of there. I really didn’t mean that. We’re both so happy that you took us out of there and showed us the outer world and we have no desire to return back to those days, it was just-“

“I know. Don’t say anymore.” Because Killua understood perfectly what she meant. If he could switch places with Gon that easily, he’d definitely do it to save his soulmate from that continuous suffering and loneliness. He knew by first hand all the pain his family could inflict in one person, and the last thing he wanted was that Gon had to go through such a horrible experience.

“Okay, but enough about me. The real question here is, how are _you_?”

“_Me_?”

“Yes _you_, onii-chan. Gon is my friend and I care a lot about him, but I know your love for him is entirely different, way deeper; and I can see how you are retaining all those feelings inside you. If you don’t let them out, in a situation like this, you’ll end up exploding. So, it’s okay if you want to scream, or you want to cry; just do it.”

And that moment was his breakdown. Alluka was right; since he had woken up on the beach that morning he had been unconsciously burying his feelings in his chest, and only then realized how much he had wanted to just let them all out.

“C-can I?”

The dam broke and the first tear of what threatened to be a huge cascade started rolling along his cheek. Alluka smiled softly at him and answered in a quiet voice.

“All the time you need.” She circled her arms around his neck in a comforting hug and made his head rest on her shoulder.

Killua didn’t try to contain the tears anymore and everything that had been hiding in his chest went out in the form of salty drops. The sadness at having lost his soulmate, the rage against his own family for being so cruel towards them, his helplessness at the unfairness of the situation and his broken heart at knowing the treatment Gon would probably be receiving in that precise moment. And so much more he couldn’t even put name to.

All of that finally came out of him, and after what felt like hours of crying and sobbing against his sister’s shoulder, he felt so much lighter. Those feelings, those emotions wouldn’t be a dead weight anymore. Now he knew how to deal with them when it hurt and how to save his heart from sinking on them. It didn’t solve the problem at all, but it helped to bear with it a little easier.

He finally lifted his head from Alluka’s now completely soaked shoulder and stared at her bright eyes.

“Thank you, Alluka. I love you.”

“Love you too, onii-chan.” And she planted a sweet kiss on his cheek. “And save one of those for Gon, for when we see him again.” She added with a grin tugging at her lips

And that comment from his sister would have made him utterly flustered the day before, but in that moment his cheeks just warmed a little before he answered with the first genuine smile of the day.

“Yeah, I know.”

Because of course he was going to see him again and he would finally get the chance to say those three words he hadn’t been able to say hours ago, when they got interrupted. He would save Gon and make sure his family left them alone once and for all. He wasn’t giving up now. He just needed a plan, and he’d be heading towards the mansion as soon as he came up with one.

His gaze lowered to the mark on his wrist, and just like the flame drawing on his skin, a little spark of hope fired in Killua’s heart.

‘Wait for me Gon, I’ll soon be there.’


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for this chapter: torture and graphic depictions of violence

The door opened with a low creak, as it had done the two previous days at the same time, and the long black haired Zoldyck entered the room.

Or more precisely, the cell.

Gon had been confined to that room for three days now, and it was always the same. In the morning, Illumi came to ask him questions, mostly about where Alluka was hiding; questions that he never answered, and as a result, another of Killua's brothers came in the afternoon to punish him for his silence. The first day was tough but bearable; the second was considerably worse and his whole body hurt by the end of it. Today, Gon expected it to be a living hell.

But even if Gon's skin burned by now and the wounds all over his body couldn't heal properly as they were being ripped open again and again, he was determined not to speak, not to say a word. No matter how much he had to suffer, he would never betray his friends.

So when Illumi entered the room for the third day, Gon, tired of his constant same questions, made himself clear from the first moment.

"It's useless. I'm not saying anything to you." His voice sounded rough, as it hurt him to just talk - that bad was his condition at that moment - but even so, he wouldn't give up. Although Killua had never told him directly, the way he talked about pain and the faint scars on his back and torso he had managed to take a quick look at when the pale boy wasn't aware of it, made Gon highly suspect that Killua had received this treatment and much worse from his family on a regular basis through all his life. Just the thought of it made his blood boil in his veins, increasing his determination in remaining silent and endure bravely with anything else that would come after it, as Killua did.

"So the punishment is not enough to make you talk? I'll tell Milluki to increase it then. But I guessed you would say that, so today I'll try something different I’ve been working on."

He slowly approached him and Gon just stared at him with the most composed and menacing expression he could manage from his spot on the floor, which of course, didn't affect Illumi at all. He kneeled down at Gon's side and took a needle out of nowhere. At the sight of it, knowing how badly those sharp metals could manipulate and affect people, Gon tried to back up, even if his body was already pressing against the wall. He squirmed with the little force he had left, trying to avoid the needle piercing his skin, but in the end he was only able to delay the jab for a second, as Illumi hold him tight by the jaw with one hand and stuck the needle painfully inside his head with the other.

"Now, stop fighting against it and answer my questions."

As soon as the order was said, Gon felt his muscles relaxing against his will and his mind opening a little to the man in front of him.

"Why wasn't him with you two when I found you?"

Gon felt the sudden need to answer the question, as opposed to his determination in remaining silent. However, the urge he felt to answer was too strong to ignore, and therefore couldn't help the words that escaped from his lips.

"We found a friend of mine in the morning and... _she_ wanted to spend some time with him, so we just... parted ways." He managed to avoid telling anything really important, but all the effort he had made to struggle with his own mind left him panting.

"Mh, interesting.” Illumi quieted for a moment, probably thinking about the implications of it and making up his next question. “And why didn't you just remain together? Was there a special reason why you went separate ways?"

"Because-" No, he had to stop himself, he couldn't tell him. He shut his eyes with force and struggled with that wish of responding that wasn't his. "- they are-" ‘No, stop!’ he shouted to himself on his mind. But he was tired and in pain, and struggling that constant urge to answer in those conditions was hard. It hurt, and Gon didn't have the strength to fight it in that moment. He tried, really tried, but his efforts weren't enough and his mouth opened against his will and let out the crucial word in a defeated whisper. "- soulmates."

Illumi's eyes widened just the slightest bit and just murmured. "I see."

Gon mentally cursed himself. He was weak. After all the training he had done in the last four years and now a needle and a bit of physical pain was enough to defeat him. He had thought he was quite strong by now, but that had been just a lie. He lowered his head to avoid looking at those dead and dangerous eyes anymore, and curled his fists at his sides, hating the man in front of him.

"Now tell me, where are they?" And defeated as he was, unable to stop himself or even think about it, he immediately responded in all honesty. "I don't know."

"So, tell me something you know. Like, what is your friend's name?"

And at that, something inside Gon reacted, and the boy suddenly felt a bit more owner of himself. He just couldn't tell him Zushi's name, because if he did, then everything would be lost. If he did, that would be the worst betrayal ever, to Alluka and Zushi, to Killua and to himself, as he was completely sure that piece of information was just enough for Illumi to find the pair. So even if it made his brain suffer a short circuit, this time he would not talk at all, by any means.

He struggled so hard and was in so much pain at refraining that artificial desire to speak, that he started feeling dizzy. But he did not stop. His lips were pressed in a thin line, shut with force to oblige him to stay quiet.

After a few seconds, a cold hand held his cheek and Illumi made him look up again at those black voids he had for eyes.

"It's an easy question. Just tell me, _Gon_, and all the pain will go away. What's his name?"

He started breathing heavily and shook his head to get rid of those cold and deathly fingers on his face. No, he had made a decision; he wouldn't make another mistake. He couldn't betray his friend and disappoint Killua like that. The thought gave him the strength he needed to keep fighting. His head now ached so much, but he was determined to endure the pain for as long as it lasted.

And so, the seconds passed and he didn't say a word. He heard a low sigh, followed by a ‘guess it doesn't work anymore’. And before Gon could process what was happening, a sharp pain went through his brain once again, and he felt everything clear and painless for a second, before the dizziness rapidly increased and he fell helplessly on the floor and everything turned black.

~

He woke up to the sound of chains ragging on the floor. His eyelids felt heavy, and didn’t open his eyes until he felt the pressure of hard metal against his wrists and his body being lifted in the air like he weighted nothing.

He knew what came next.

Right in front of him was another of Killua’s brothers. He would have never said it, since they were total opposites: short black haired, with an untrustworthy face and probably an obesity problem too; that’s how Gon would describe Milluki. Or also, a torture maniac.

“Oh, I see you’ve woken up. So let’s start with the fun.”

The Zoldyck made the whip crack in the air once before landing it on him and starting ripping his already wounded skin. It still hurt as much as the first day, way more because of his damaged state, but now he swallowed all the screams at the edge of his throat and remained silent as the torture continued. Milluki laughed like a maniac, and just his voice and the cracking of the whip half a second before it pierced the flesh was heard in the room. Soon enough, blood started coming out from the countless wounds on his chest, his limbs, even his face; and it burnt like fire against his skin.

Milluki continued for minutes, maybe even hours, Gon couldn’t tell, and he just endured the pain the best he could without letting a sound escape from his mouth, just hanging in the chains like a ragdoll.

At some time, due to the great strength the Zoldyck was using to hit him, the chain on his right wrist broke and opened, making his arm fall at his side. He was relieved from the metal oppression for a moment, but Milluki soon approached him, annoyed and cursing loudly, ready to lock his wrist in a new chain and resume his job as soon as possible.

And it was then that he noticed Gon’s mark for the first time.

“Huh?! What is this?” He asked, _demanded_ to know, with a scowl showing on his face.

Realizing where Milluki’s attention was now entirely on, Gon suddenly retracted the hand and hid it out of the other’s view. The action just made the man upset, and forcefully he took Gon’s arm and exposed his wrist to examine what had caught his attention.

“What is this? I’m not going to repeat it.” He threatened, as he slowly took a knife from his pocket.

Gon’s eyes widened, anticipating the horror that man was capable of doing, and would probably do, if he didn’t answer.

“I-it’s a mark that appeared the first time I met Killua.”

“Huh, true. A lightning, just like him.” He murmured to himself. “But, you’re not from the family. You took Killu from us, so you have no right to have that symbol on your skin.” And before he could even process what was happening, he felt the sharp blade cutting into his skin, exactly in the place where his precious mark was on his wrist.

This time, Gon didn’t care to control himself.

He shouted loudly, pleading the other to stop as his weak attempts to free his hand were all in vain. He tried to punch Milluki on the face, and kick him on the stomach, but truth was he could barely move in that position, and thus he could just watch horrified how the Zoldyck turned the sensitive skin on his wrist with the mark he loved so much on it, into a mess of cuts, scratches and blood.

A complete disaster.

He screamed at the top of his lungs. This horrendous person in front of him was destroying the symbol of his relationship with Killua, one of the best and most beautiful things he had in his life. It hurt; it hurt whenever the knife ripped his skin and destroyed the mark, leaving a new scar that would surely remain there the rest of his life. And it also hurt his heart, in a completely new and different type of pain.

“Oh, yes. That’s what I wanted.” A disgusting smirk showed on the man’s features, and Gon hated it. He hated him with every fiber of his being.

Fortunately, Milluki soon left his wrist – basically because it couldn’t look worse than it already was – and resumed with the whips. Gon continued screaming, not because of the new and reopened wounds on his body, but because of the pain that still lingered on his heart at having his mark in such a terrible state, buried in his own red thick blood and not really sure if it remained there anymore.

When Milluki felt satisfied enough with his results - that was, when Gon was on the verge of collapsing - he unlocked the chains and let him agonizing on the hard floor as he exited and locked the room behind him.

Gon didn’t have the strength to move at all, so he just stayed as he had landed on the floor, with both his body and his heart aching in complete pain. He looked at his wrist for a moment, but couldn’t stand the view for more than a second, and he just approached it to his chest and held it close to his heart. His vision blurred, and it took him a moment to realize that he had started crying.

His thoughts inevitably went to Killua. He missed him so much, and it was much more painful without being able to see the lightning mark that reminded Gon so much of him and had calmed him in the worst moments he had spent in that room. He wanted Killua to come and take him out of that place and just return to the happy days they had spent together with Alluka, which seemed so far from the present.

But he knew that’s not what he should want. Gon didn’t want Killua to have to face his family ever again, and now that he himself knew how they worked, much less even. But Gon was selfish and just needed to see his soulmate, and after all, Killua had said he would come to rescue him, right?

Two more tears escaped from his eyes, and Gon didn’t even have the strength to wipe the off, so he felt how they lazily fell through his cheeks until they landed on the floor, along with the previous ones.

Gon knew he didn’t deserve it. He had broken his promise. He remembered telling Killua he wouldn’t permit Illumi to do anything to him, that he’d never have to come to that horrible house ever again, but when the time arrived, he hadn’t been able to do absolutely nothing. And yet, there he was, hoping that Killua would come and take him out of that place.

He was so selfish.

But he would wait, because he trusted Killua with all his being and knew he would keep his promise, even if Gon hadn’t been able to keep his. And even if the feeling still conflicted him, and the pain was so strong it didn’t let him focus for more than a few seconds, there, laying sorely on the hard floor and covered in blood and countless wounds, he could just think of the moment when he would see his soulmate again.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I can't believe this story reached 100 kudos! I never thought I would make it this far, and it makes me so happy!!  
A huge thank you to all of you!!!! ♡  
Now, here is the chapter. Hope you enjoy it! ^^

It had already been three days, and Killua couldn't wait any longer. Not when Gon, his first and best friend, his soulmate and basically the most wonderful person he had ever met, was being held as a prisoner by his family and he was the only one with the power to free him. Or at least he thought so, because even if he wasn't going to follow his brother’s conditions, he was going to do anything in his hand to liberate his friend.

How he'd do it, he didn't know, as not even with the help of Zushi and Alluka he managed to think of a plan with possibilities of success, but he'd figure it out. He'd probably be able to do something more than what he was doing at Zushi's place, letting the hours pass overworking his brain to no avail.

So he just left.

He didn't inform Alluka or Zushi about it, because he knew they'll never let him return to the mansion all by himself and with no plan at all, so he left a note before leaving, telling them where he was going and to not follow him. He asked Zushi to take care of Alluka once again and not let her put herself in danger. After spending two days together, he got to know the boy a bit better, and he now trusted Zushi enough to leave Alluka with him for an indefinite time.

He spent almost the whole day travelling; he took two dirigibles to reach the continent and then a train that left him in a city nearby Kukuro Mountain by the time the sun was setting behind the hills. By then, Killua was already sick of transports, so he made the rest of the way to his family's house running with his Godspeed, each step longer and faster than the previous one, bright sparks coming out of his skin and lighting up the way in the darkening woods.

The moon was high in the sky by the time he finally reached the Testing Gate. He opened three of the doors - he was a little untrained, he noticed - and went directly to the mansion. When he caught sight of it, he couldn’t help but feel a bit breathless. Gon was inside those walls, retained there against his will, as a prisoner, probably in awful conditions. But now Killua was there, and he was going to save him, this time, _this_ time for sure. He’d never forgive himself if he didn’t. Except giving Alluka to them, he'd do anything to free him.

Anything.

He entered the house and walked with firm steps, looking for someone to end this; in the best case, his father, and in the worst, the stupid brother that had started the entire situation. In the end, the first he found was Kalluto, what was a surprise; Killua sometimes forgot about him. His younger brother was always so quiet, and it was rare for Killua to see him in the house, but because of that they didn't talk much, and so their relationship wasn't as awful as the ones he shared with his older brothers. Instead, it was pretty neutral, not good but not bad, either.

"So you returned home."

Killua didn't answer and asked directly to the important issue.

"Where is him?"

"Dad wants to talk to you. Illumi too."

"I'm not talking to them until I see him."

"And you won't see him until you talk to them. That's what they said." He replied as he put the hands together in front of him, covered by the kimono wide sleeves. He waited patiently for Killua to reply, but the boy didn't say a word, his mind running wild thinking of what he should do, what was the best course of action. Every move he made from now on would have consequences, for better or worse, so he couldn’t act on impulse; he had to think carefully everything he said.

"If you are not doing anything, I'm going to tell them you've arrived. You should come." Kalluto turned on his heels and started walking through the dark corridor leading to their father's chamber.

"Fine." Killua reluctantly answered, and started following his younger brother. The faster he ended with this, the better for Gon.

They walked in silence and soon arrived to their father's room, where they found him talking to Illumi and Kikyo. They quieted when the two youngest sons entered the barely lit up place, though Kalluto just told them a couple of words and left as soon as he had arrived, closing the door behind him.

"You came alone?" Illumi asked, missing Alluka's presence from the first second.

"Yes."

"You know that wasn't the deal. You have to come with your brother if you want us to free your 'deathmate'" his father added.

"I know, and I don't care. You are not seeing Alluka ever again, so start forgetting about her. She is now happy and safe from you, who have done nothing but treat her like a prisoner all these years."

"My, my Killu." His mother tried to calm him down at the harshness of his words, although it was nothing but the truth."You know he is special, and so he deserved a special treatment."

And it was in that moment that Killua exploded.

"You call that ‘special treatment’?! You just locked her in that room because of her powers, to control her day and night, and because you were too afraid of her, when she really is inoffensive. And for goodness sake, how many times do I have to tell you? Alluka is a _girl_! Why can't you understand that?!" He saw his mother with the intention to reply, but Killua really wasn't in the mood to keep talking about this topic. There were more important things to discuss. "Anyway! I'm not talking more about this. She is not coming here, not now, not ever. End of the discussion." And he hoped the intense glare that he directed at them was enough to make them understand he was not giving in on this matter.

"Well, then you can forget about Gon, too." His brother blatantly replied.

Killua clenched the fists inside the pockets of his shorts, so hard that his nails left marks on the skin of his palms. He had expected that response from the beginning, but it didn't make him less furious because of that.

With the most collected voice he could muster, he announced.

"I still think we can make an accord that satisfies us both."

At that, his father moved slightly forward, with evident interest showing on his eyes.

"So? What is your idea?"

Killua had none, to be honest. Nothing he could think of would make both he and Gon leave the mansion and make his family forget about them. So there was just one other possibility, the one he didn't want to think about, to even consider, but that was the only option. He knew he couldn't save Gon without sacrificing something, the only thing that his family could be interested in.

And that was he himself; his own freedom.

"If you..." The words felt heavy on his mouth, reluctant to be worded. This was the last thing he wanted for him, but it was probably the only way to save Gon and assure Alluka's freedom at the same time. He closed his eyes for a second, and took a deep breath to continue the sentence and mouth the words he desperately didn't want to say. "If you set him free, I'll return to my former assassin occupation and I'll never leave again. You can even have Ilumi install on me all the needles he wants, I don't care, but just set him free."

"Well, of course that was implied in the previous deal, so it's less than what we expect you to do in the first place.” Silva argued.

“It’s this or nothing. Maybe Alluka is out of your reach now, but I’m still here and I know I am useful to you.”

“Indeed, you are very useful to us. But you’ll be whether we make a deal or not. What makes you think that you can escape again from this house if you don’t get what you want?” Illumi threatened, trying to scare him, as he always did.

Killua knew all too well that he had entered into the lion’s den without a proper plan, but after living years and years between those walls, he wasn’t afraid anymore. He hated it with all his heart, and it was the last thing he wanted for himself, but it didn’t scare him.

“I don’t plan on escaping, because I have no intention to leave nor start working again with you until you liberate Gon. So, the question here is, what makes you think I’m going to follow your orders if you don’t set him free?”

Killua felt he was vibrating. He had never confronted his family, especially his father, so directly before. He had been so afraid in the past and it felt not really worth it, and now he wondered if that had been entirely his own mind stopping him or if it had been a mental barrier imposed by the secret needle Illumi had planted on his brain since who knows when. But now, he had a reason to fight and to stand up bravely, and he wouldn’t give in anymore. He would sacrifice himself if needed, but only if he obtained something in return, and that was, Gon’s freedom.

At that declaration, his mother seemed surprised, Illumi lifted an eyebrow but apart from that his features didn’t change at all, and his father observed him with a curious look in the eyes, but as silently as the other two.

Kikyo was the first to talk, getting a bit worked up after her initial surprise.

“Killu, don’t talk to us with that arrogant tone! We’re your parents, so you must-“

Silva cut her off with a gesture of the hand, and he just stared intently at Killua for a few seconds more before speaking.

“You’ve grown up, Killua. Sure, you can make your own decisions now, and I see that you won’t change your mind in this matter.” He paused for a second, letting Killua sink those words on his brain. This was definitely unexpected, but he didn’t get his hopes up, not yet. “That’s why I propose you another deal. I accept your return to the family business, and as a reward you’ll be able to visit your friend as much as you want. But, he’ll stay here.”

“What?!”

“Look Killua, as much as you refuse to bring Alluka back, we’re not going to give up. We still want hi-… _her_. So take this as a temporary measure. I am positive that with time you’ll realize that this is the only option you have to free Gon, and so you’ll end up giving in to our conditions.”

What was his father thinking? Of course he wasn’t going to change his mind, not now, not tomorrow, not a week later. As for now, Alluka was out of danger, and he had no intention to change that, even if it seemed to be the only way to save Gon.

But that look his father was directing at him showed the same determination he himself had, so he thought that maybe, he should accept this. As he said, it was just a temporary measure, so it’d give him the time to think about a real plan that could work to free Gon, and at the same time he’d be able to, if not take him away, at least see him. It wasn’t the best solution, but it wasn’t a bad start either.

And Killua couldn’t deny that he was dying to see Gon.

“Fine.” Killua blurted, just hoping he hadn’t made a mistake.

Silva made a half smile, as if he had already won. But he hadn’t. No, he’d think of something, he was sure. And even if he was walking in a thin line in this matter, this time, he, Killua Zoldyck, for once, would get what he wanted.

He was done with this conversation, he just wanted to leave that tense atmosphere and see Gon.

Gon… he had missed him so much.

“Now, tell me where is he.”

“Oh, you know where he is. In Milluki’s favorite room.” Illumi responded with indifference. And Killua had expected that answer, but he had also hoped to be wrong. His breath caught in his chest for a moment and in that instant something came flying to him. He instinctively caught it in the air and soon recognized the object in his hand.

A key.

And he knew the door it opened.

“Just go.”

He didn’t even know who had been the one to utter those last words to him, because as soon as he recognized the key, he exited the room in the blink of an eye and rushed through the corridors and the stairs with his heart pounding furiously in his chest.

He arrived to the room in a matter of seconds and abruptly stopped in front of the locked door. He could hear the blood roaring in his ears. Behind that wooden door, there was Gon. They had only been separated for three days, but it was the longest they had been apart since the moment they met, and it had felt like years for Killua.

He lifted his hand to fit the key in the lock, but he couldn’t. It was trembling. He was eager to see Gon after everything that had happened, and at the same time, he was afraid. Afraid of the way his family had treated him and that would surely reflect on his appearance. He didn’t know how bad it would be, but knowing them, Killua prepared himself for the worst.

Now that he had arrived, he’d be the one to take care of him and he’d make sure not to let his family even approach the room ever again. Now that he was there, Gon would be safe, if not free yet.

With a deep intake of air, he steadied his trembling hand, unlocked the door and entered the room where Gon was awaiting him.


	19. Chapter 19

Gon was still lying on the floor in a semiconscious state when the door opened again. He unconsciously flinched at the chirping of the hinges and the low creak the wooden door made when it was pushed forward and then closed a second later.

The pain from the previous torture had ceased to the point that it was almost bearable if he didn’t move an inch from his position on the hard floor, so he didn’t even try to look up to see which Zoldyck had been the one to enter his cell this time. Normally, after Milluki’s physical punishment, they left him alone until the next day; but it seemed that day was a day of changes, so Gon wouldn’t be surprised if they had something else ready for him.

Silent steps approached him and Gon curled the slightest bit on himself. He was terribly wounded, hurt and tired; he didn’t know if he could endure another round of whips, cuts or mental tricks on his brain. He knew he had to be strong, for his friends, for Killua, but each second it passed it was more difficult to keep that in mind. He didn’t know how much longer he could stand this, how much time it would pass until he finally broke. He just wanted to return to the days where Killua, Alluka and he had been traveling around, and wipe the memories from the last three days off like they never happened, like it had just been a terrible nightmare.

The steps stopped close behind him and Gon caught his breath in his chest, waiting for the moment a rough hand would forcefully take him from the floor and just do as it pleased with him. He definitely knew he didn’t have the strength to stop it this time.

But nothing happened. Seconds passed and the person behind him didn’t move. Instead, Gon heard him breathing heavily until he let out in a shaky voice.

“G-gon?”

Gon let out the air he had been holding and his eyes widened. It had been three long days since he last heard that voice; that familiar and beautiful voice, but that now sounded so much frightened and relieved at equal parts. His muscles were moving before even thinking of it. He turned from his side to his back, suppressing a cry of pain in the process, until he finally saw him.

“Killua…” Gon just managed to say in a hoarse voice, as a genuine smile tugged at his lips for the first time in days.

The moment Killua saw the full state of his body - his bloody wounds, his bruised skin and even his weak voice and appearance - panic showed on his features. He fell on his knees next to Gon, speechless, way too shocked to even utter a word or do anything that wasn’t stare in horror at his emaciated state. A pair of tears soon appeared at the corners of his eyes and fell through his pale cheeks. He started shaking, and Gon didn’t know if it was from fear, anger or frustration; maybe a mix of all three.

With the little force he could muster, Gon gently placed his hand over Killua’s and smiled softly to him.

“You did it. You came for me. I never doubted it. Thank you, Killua.”

“Of course I did, I couldn’t- And still, I came too late.” He lowered his head, so that white bangs covered Killua’s beautiful ocean like eyes. “I’m so sorry.” A new tear fell down his cheek.

Gon quickly shushed him, slowly caressing his hand with his damaged fingers.

“This isn’t your fault, so don’t apologize.” The white haired boy shook slightly his head and another tear fell from his eyes, landing on top of Gon’s hand over Killua’s. “Please, look at me, Killua.”

He did as told, slowly looking up until their gazes met and those breathtaking, pure blue eyes, now filled with tears, were staring into his honey brown ones. Gon noticed how Killua inhaled sharply at the sight of his awful appearance once again. His eyes reflected guilt and sadness like Gon had never seen on them before.

He opened his mouth to say something, to assure him that he’d be okay, that now that they were together everything would be fine, when Killua seemed to remember something and with a determined look in the eyes, he furiously wiped away the tears and quickly got up and crossed the room. For an excruciating moment, Gon thought Killua was leaving him, but his irrational fear dissipated when the pale boy stopped in front of the table located in one corner of the room and took out a small box from one of the drawers.

He rushed again to Gon’s side and opened the box to reveal its contents; a first aid kit.

“Come on, I help you to sit up.”

Killua bent down, gently taking Gon by the back of his shoulders and waist, and helped him to incorporate in a sitting position, resting his back on the wall behind him. Gon just clung to Killua’s T-shirt and tried to help the most he could for the movement, a few gasps and hisses escaping his mouth as his whole body hurt with that simple action.

Once he was comfortable enough, Killua tried to back up a bit to take the kit and start healing him, but he was stopped by Gon’s hand still holding onto his T-shirt, not wanting to separate from him even an inch, even a second.

“I missed you.”

Gon whispered in a barely audible voice, worried it might break. His hand clutching Killua started trembling and he shifted the slightest bit closer to the boy next to him. Killua pressed his lips in a thin line and watched him with a tender, but also sad look in the eyes. He carefully took the tanned hand on his chest with one of his pale ones, as the other reached to Gon’s face and wiped a tear that had escaped from his eye, before gently brushing some bangs of dirty and messy hair out of his face and planting a soft kiss on his forehead.

Gon felt immediately a bit better.

“I missed you too. I missed you so much.” Killua breathed against his forehead.

This time, Gon let him back up. Killua took a small towel and a bottle with some liquid and wordlessly started cleaning his skin from the dried blood and disinfecting his worst wounds. Gon just stared at him working, so concentrated, making sure to correctly heal even the slightest cut, and acting with so much care. It still hurt, but it was nothing compared to the pain from earlier in the day, and Gon felt a bit better after each new injury was cleaned.

The situation reminded Gon of the time when he and Killua met for the first time; just their roles were reversed now, and the circumstances had escalated to a much worse scenario. But the thought made him nostalgic and despite everything, a warm feeling settled in his chest.

Killua was done with his legs and chest, so he moved to his arms, and soon enough Gon saw him gasp in horror and clutch the towel with anger in his hands. He was staring at the mess that was his right wrist, exactly where he knew all too well what should be there instead. Tentatively, with smooth moves, he started cleaning the dried blood, and Gon had to look away, because he wasn’t ready to see how bad it looked, how destroyed his precious mark really was.

However, he soon heard Killua sigh in relief, and so Gon dared to take a look at his wrist.

The mark was immaculate. Exactly as it had been from the first day it appeared. Even the skin under it was intact; just a few cuts lingered on the borders of skin that were close to the mark, but nothing more. Gon was so relieved that a wide grin tugged at his lips, and even if it hurt from the cuts that were splayed on his cheeks, he couldn’t seem to stop.

It had to be magic; the same that connected Gon’s soul with Killua’s, their bond so strong that nothing could ever break it, and therefore the marks on their wrists would always remain with them, perfectly showing themselves as the first day and impossible to erase no matter what.

Killua was smiling too. He lightly stroked the lighting mark with his thumb for a moment and then proceeded to clean the rest of the wounds on his arms and his face. He took then a roller of bandages and some gauze pads from the kit and bandaged some of the worst wounds. Gon was almost disappointed when he finished, as Killua’s fingers were so gentle and tender against his skin that he didn’t want the contact to end.

“There.” Killua finished, putting one last band-aid on Gon’s cheek. “This is all I can do.”

“Thank you Killua. I feel much better now.” And he meant it. The pain hadn’t gone away at all, but his wounds were treated now, and together with Killua’s presence, it was everything he needed in that moment. “I wish I knew there was a first aid kit in the room. I could have used it before and so you wouldn’t have had to do all the job now.” He sheepishly added.

“Don’t be silly, it was nothing.” Killua replied a bit flustered. “But the kit was hidden, so even if you had looked for it, you probably wouldn’t have found it. I hid it myself; no one else knew it was there.”

A pained look crossed Killua’s features and Gon understood without any more words. He imagined a young Killua locked in that same room as he had been for three days, going for the kit and healing himself, cleaning his own cuts and bandaging his own wounds the best he could, in complete pain. And not only for three days, but through all his life. He imagined Killua with six, eight, ten, thirteen, sixteen years old, all of them in the same situation, and he almost could hear his heart breaking at the thought of it. It made his situation look like it was nothing.

Ignoring the pain, Gon closed the distance between them and hugged Killua, circling his arms around his middle and burying his head on the other’s chest. Killua didn’t hesitate to return it, holding him close by the shoulders, but careful not to hurt him, and hiding his face on Gon’s hair, that wasn’t really spiky anymore. And for the first time in days, there, in Killua’s arms, Gon felt safe.

A long time passed before Gon broke the comfortable silence that had fallen upon them.

“So, what’s your plan?”

At that question, Gon felt Killua tensing in the hug, what made him worry. He separated from the pale boy just enough to be face to face and asked again, now more hesitantly.

“Is everything okay, Killua? You have a plan, don’t you? You wouldn’t have come if you didn’t… or you shouldn’t, at least.”

Killua quickly tore his eyes from Gon’s and looked to the side.

“I didn’t have a plan when I came here. Alluka, Zushi and I spent two whole days thinking of what we could do to free you, but once you enter, there is no escape route from this mansion if my family doesn’t want you to leave, so we came up with nothing that could work. But. I couldn’t just leave you here, alone, with them. The waiting was killing me, and even if I didn’t have a plan I had to do something. So, without telling my sister, I grabbed my things in the morning and did all the way here.”

Killua paused for a moment. Gon wanted to say lots of things to that, but he waited for the other to resume and finish his talking first.

“I’ve just talked with Illumi and my parents. They want me to bring Alluka back to them so badly, and said that they won’t set you free until I do it. But I can’t do it. I’d do anything else to liberate you, Gon, but that’s the only thing that I can’t give them. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. You did the right thing. I’d never accept that you sacrificed Alluka for myself.” Killua looked up then, and Gon gave him a little reassuring smile. “So, what happens now?”

Killua hesitated for a moment before answering.

“We made a deal, something like a temporary measure. I accepted to stay here with them, and in return, they won’t free you yet, but at least they’ll let me see you. Of course I won’t permit that any of them comes again near to you, and maybe I can even convince them to take you to my room or any other, instead of this one. I know it’s not the best solution, but at least you’ll be in better conditions and we can gain time to think of a proper plan to finally get you out of here.”

“Us.”

“Huh?”

“To get us out of here.” Gon repeated, and the tone of his voice made clear that the contrary was out of question.

Killua smiled softly at him but didn’t say anything else, and Gon was suddenly afraid that the other might do something crazy and unacceptable to save him. But he didn’t want to think about that possibility right now. Right now, he just wanted to think of nothing but Killua’s presence and how happy it made him their reunion. The situation was still bad, but now they were together, and for the moment, that was enough for Gon.

“It’s okay Killua, it was a good first step. Don’t worry about it. I can wait a little longer, especially more if you are with me.”

In response, Killua just nodded as his cheeks blossomed in a light pink. They stared at each other for a moment, until Killua’s eyes widened a little, like seeming to realize something, and muttering something under his breath that sounded like ‘how stupid I am’, he did the last thing Gon had expected.

In a swift movement, he took his T-shirt off, and before Gon could question what he was doing, he passed it through his head and arms, so that Gon was now wearing the piece of clothing.

“You must have been cold.” Killua simply explained.

Gon’s own T-shirt had been ripped to pieces on his first day there, so he had spent the rest of the time in a bare chest, but he had got used to it by now. It was true that he got cold at times, but that was nothing compared to the pain coming from the countless wounds on his body, so he normally paid it no mind.

The fact that Killua had noticed and had given Gon his own T-shirt, being he now the one in a bare chest and getting cold, made Gon’s heart flip in his chest and he felt how his face reddened a little. The T-shirt was warm from Killua’s body heat and it smelled just like him, making Gon feel like he was at home.

Because Whale Island would always be his home, but since meeting Killua he found that no matter where on Earth he was, if they were together, Gon always felt comfortable, warm and happy; exactly like being at home.

A genuine grin crossed his lips, and without thinking it twice, Gon closed the little distance between them, sealing their lips in a soft kiss. He felt Killua gasp in surprise for a moment, but he responded almost immediately to it, and Gon pressed closer, deepening the kiss. The tanned boy felt a pair of hands holding him carefully by the hips, pulling him closer to Killua, and Gon gladly complied until he was sitting on the other’s lap, all without breaking their contact at all. Gon circled his arms around Killua’s neck and tilted his face a bit more to deepen the kiss, pressing their bodies so close that there was literally no space between them.

They kept kissing deeply, almost desperately, but not rushed at all. They had missed each other so much, and it showed in how close and tight they were holding onto each other. Gon was pouring all his love for Killua on those kisses, and he felt Killua doing the same. Tanned hands were tangled on white locks of hair, and pale ones were drawing smooth patterns on the wounded skin underneath Killua’s T-shirt. Their chests were tightly pressed together, borrowed fabric against bare skin, and their lips long lost on one another’s, impossible to tell where each ones started. And Gon wasn’t surprised that his wounds barely hurt; the pain relegated to a second plane as his focus was entirely on Killua and just Killua.

After what felt like an eternity, they separated for a moment to catch some air. Gon rested his forehead against Killua’s and he asked in a whisper.

“Can you stay the night? I don’t want to be alone.”

Killua kissed him briefly in the lips, before replying with a small smile and a soft voice.

“Of course, I’m not going anywhere.”

They cuddled together on the hard floor, ready to go to sleep.

And unlike the previous days, the pain and despair that got to Gon before falling asleep, this time was replaced by the warmth and safety he felt at having Killua so close, as well as a fuzzy feeling in the stomach and the tingling that still remained on his lips.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyy, sorry I didn't update last week but I started my final exams and these last days have just been very stressful and I barely had any free time to keep working on this story. I haven't finished my exams yet, but things are a bit better now, so here is the chapter! ^^

Days passed and the situation didn’t change. Gon was still being held as a prisoner, and the only thing Killua was thankful for was that he had managed to convince his father to move Gon to his bedroom, where he was recovering from the torture he suffered on the previous days, his injuries healing slowly but properly.

Killua checked on him the most frequently he could, always eager to return to his soulmate’s side, but it was difficult to find time for Gon on his occupied schedule. Of course, Killua knew his family was doing it on purpose. He was forced to pick up his training in long hour sessions, attend every family meal and go on missions almost every day, sometimes returning to the mansion at late hours in the night.

It was worse than Killua remembered, especially the killing missions. His talent, his instincts hadn’t gone away at all, and it was still so easy to carry out the murder; but Killua hated it, and he could feel a little dagger sticking at his heart every time he took a new life with his hands.

He felt completely exhausted by the end of the day, both physically and mentally, but it was worth it when he returned to his bedroom and found Gon waiting for him. The wide smile on his lips and the way his features lit up when Killua entered the room was priceless, and made him immediately forget everything that had happened in the day. It felt like he entered another dimension, where only he and Gon existed, even if it was just for a short time in between Killua’s duties, or before tiredly going to sleep.

But Killua knew they couldn’t keep up like this for much longer. Gon was almost totally recovered, so he’d had to start thinking of a way to take him out of there. Ideally, the two of them would be leaving together, but Killua had lived there for sixteen long years, and only once he found a real possibility of escaping, and it had been under exceptional circumstances, which he was certain, wouldn’t repeat themselves again. Therefore, the only alternative he had was to solve everything with a new deal, one in which Gon was finally set free and he’d have to stay. Because Killua wasn’t so naïve to think that his family would let him go away with his soulmate and escape from them once again.

But he couldn’t let Gon know about it.

He felt bad whenever Gon told him a new idea to get out of that place, because everything the tanned boy thought, Killua had done it before, and thus he knew it wouldn’t work, and so he told him. Still, Gon didn’t give up and Killua felt guilty that he was overthinking so much for nothing. He hated keeping this from Gon, but Killua knew that the other boy would never accept it, even if it was the only way. And it was, so he had to do it; for Gon’s sake.

His fate was already written, Killua couldn’t escape from it now, but there was a chance for Gon, and Killua would do anything to take it. Gon would be free again, and even if it broke Killua’s heart not to be able to see his soulmate ever again, he’d do it, because Gon couldn’t just stay with these people, his horrible family that had tortured him in all the possible ways.

An idea had started forming in his head a couple of days ago. It was risky, but anything it wasn’t could work with his family, so basically, it was the best he had for the moment.

“Killua? I can hear you thinking from here.”

They were sat on the bed, Killua’s head resting tiredly on Gon’s shoulder as the other caressed his snow like hair with his fingers, in soothing movements.

“Yeah, just, you know, thinking about stuff.”

“It’s never just stuff with you, Killua.” Gon replied lightheartedly, and the pale boy could hear the smile in his voice. “So, care to tell me?”

Killua sighed. He found he couldn’t say ‘no’ to Gon, but that was nothing new.

“The same as always, I guess. Just thinking of a way to get out of here.”

Gon hummed in acknowledgement, but said nothing more. Killua sank a bit more on Gon’s shoulder, burying his face on his sweatshirt that Gon was wearing on that moment. It was weird for Killua to see Gon wearing his clothes, since their clothing styles weren’t exactly the same, but somehow, he found it cute, so he couldn’t say that he didn’t like it.

“Well, stop thinking. It’s already late, and you shouldn’t be overworking your brain so much after such a tiring day.”

“But-“

“No, there are no buts.” Gon quickly cut him off. “And I have exactly what you need to cheer up!”

Confused but equally curious, Killua lifted his head from Gon’s shoulder, who grinned playfully at him.

“Close your eyes!”

“What?” Killua snorted.

“Just do it. Trust me.” Killua lifted his eyebrow for a second, but immediately complied, because of course he trusted him. He trusted Gon with all his being.

He heard Gon getting up from the bed, crossing his room in a rush with his bare feet and returning to him in no time.

“Now, open your mouth.”

He doubted for a moment, but Killua didn’t question it at this point; so blindly trusting Gon, he did as told.

The next second, something small, round and delicious was placed on his mouth, and he instantly closed it, taking in the sweet flavor. It took him less than a second to recognize what it was, and his eyes snapped open in utter surprise.

“It’s a chocorobot-kun!” He exclaimed, totally astonished. “How?! I thought I had run out of them ages ago!”

Gon chuckled and pulled one more chocolate ball inside Killua’s mouth before replying.

“Don’t exaggerate, Killua; it was only three days ago. And I was bored this morning, so I entertained myself tidying your wardrobe and drawers and I just found it hidden in one corner.” Gon explained, popping one of the balls inside his own mouth.

“Hey, it’s mine. Don’t eat it!”

“Aw come on, Killua. I found it, so we should share.”

“I haven’t eaten chocolate in a long time. Sharing is not an option.” Killua deadpanned in all seriousness, to which Gon just laughed and replied.

“You’ll have to come for it, then!” Gon declared in a playful tone, already getting up from the bed and running along the room.

Killua rushed after him right away, with a smirk tugging at his lips. He chased him for a couple of minutes, but the room wasn’t that big, to begin with, and Gon’s movements soon slowed down, as he was still recovering from his wounds, so it all ended with Killua tackling Gon and pinning him on the couch.

Gon was laughing loudly, still holding the chocolate robot tight against his chest, not wanting to give it to Killua. The white haired boy struggled against it, trying to take it out from the other’s grasp, some giggles inevitably escaping from his mouth in the process. It wasn’t working, so Killua decided it was time to play dirty.

From his position on top of Gon, he moved his hands to Gon’s sides and started tickling them. Gon laughed even louder, and squirmed under Killua.

“No way, that’s ch-cheating!” Killua kept going, simply ignoring the comment. “Okay, okay, I give up! P-please stop, Killua!”

“Chocorobot, now.”

But instead of giving the full box to Killua, Gon took one of the chocolate balls and pulled it inside his mouth, as he had done before. And this time, after the initial surprise had already passed and with Gon now pinned underneath him, Killua couldn’t help the blush that came to his cheeks at the gesture.

“J-just give it to me! I can eat it myself.”

“I know. But I like it this way.” Gon happily and innocently replied, making Killua even more flustered.

After a few seconds, he groaned, getting off of Gon and sitting properly on the couch, the tanned boy following him behind. He crossed his arms in his chest and stated.

“Stop being embarrassing and just give me the chocorobot.”

“Okay. But I want something in return.”

Killua felt disconcerted for a moment. “Everything in this room is as yours as it is mine; I don’t know what else I can give you.”

“What about a kiss?” Gon suggested with a smile, already reaching closer to Killua.

Killua blinked and snorted lightly. Gon was so simple sometimes. He should have known by now that he didn’t need to blackmail him to get a kiss from him, if that’s what he wanted.

With a soft smile, he took Gon’s face gently in his hands and pulled him forward until their lips met in a chaste kiss.

“Happy?” Killua asked with a fond look in the eyes as he separated a little, their faces remaining just inches apart.

“Mh, not really.”

“Huh?!” Killua felt offended and his face reddened even more. He backed away and stared at Gon from a bit more of distance. “Wh-what do you say ‘not really’? It was perfect!”

“It was too short.” Gon explained, grinning.

And now, Killua knew Gon was just teasing him.

“You’re impossible. Just give me my chocolate!”

Gon laughed loudly and finally offered him the chocorobot, which Killua quickly took from his hands and started devouring like he hadn’t eaten anything in years.

And in moments like this, playing and laughing so casually, it was easy to forget they were trapped in that house full of assassins. A little moment of joy and fun in between the awful situation they were in.

But Killua still had his priorities clear.

Two days later, when Gon was totally healed from his wounds and Killua had refined the plan on his mind; he decided it was time to end this once and for all.

He headed directly to his father’s room with newfound determination after his morning training, and entered the chamber without knocking first, as he had always done before. Silva looked up at the intruder from his spot on the couch, and the moment their blue gazes met, the adult seemed to understand why Killua was there.

“So, I see you’ve come to a conclusion.”

“Yes.” Killua agreed, as he approached his father to be now in front of him.

“I hope you’ve realized that returning Alluka to us is your only option.”

Killua hated the confident tone in his voice, showing how sure his father was that he could predict what he was going to do and that he still had any control over him.

“It isn’t.”

“Really? Maybe it hasn’t been enough time for that, then.”

“No. It’s been enough. I want to end this now.” Killua insisted with determination.

Silva sighed, impatient but not really surprised.

“We made our conditions clear, Killua. We are not changing them.”

“Oh, I’m sure you will after I tell you my intentions.” Killua stated confidently. Not that he was completely sure that his plan would work, but he just couldn’t show any sign of weakness or hesitation, or else, everything would end before even starting.

His father glared at him for a moment, as if he could read his plan in the depths of his intense ocean like eyes.

“Talk.”

Killua had prepared perfectly in his mind what he’d say, so he didn’t hesitate when he declared.

“First of all, I want to make clear that Alluka will be completely left out of this, so you’d better start giving up on her because I won’t permit you to see her ever again.” He took a breath and resumed. “As I told you days ago, I want you to liberate Gon and in return I’ll stay here in the mansion, working for you as an assassin for the rest of my life. I’ll even improve the offer by gladly accepting to be the heir of the family business and running it the best I can when the times comes, as you’ve always wanted. But all that will only happen if you set Gon free right now.”

“You’re repeating yourself. I don’t see the difference with the actual situation.” Silva deadpanned.

“The difference is, if you don’t accept this, you’ll lose me forever.”

“And how would it be? You can’t escape from here, Killua.” His father reminded him, as if his son had somehow forgotten about that constant which had always cut off his freedom and defined his life.

“I know, and I don’t need it.”

And there was where all his hopes were laying. His next movement would determine the success or fail of his plan.

“Because, if you don’t comply,” He morphed his right hand into a deathly claw and approached it to his neck, his long and sharp nails slightly piercing the pale skin. “I’ll end my life right now.”


	21. Chapter 21

Intense blue eyes were shining with determination, dangerously glaring at the man in front of him.

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not.” Killua deadpanned, sinking his nails a bit more in the flesh, to show him he was being serious.

Killua had thought a lot about it, and although he was saying it more like a threat than a real thing, he reached to the conclusion that in the end, in the worst case scenario, he could do it. Now that Alluka was safe, a part of him thought there was no sense for Killua in living a life where he wasn’t able to be with her and he and Gon couldn’t be free and together. The days he had lived with the tanned boy had been the best in Killua’s life, so bright and full of emotions he didn’t even know he could feel until he met Gon.

But he really hoped he didn’t have to come to that extreme. He was positive that if he kept a convincing performance he would finally get what he wanted, as the threat was too big for his family to ignore. So, knowing how much they needed his abilities and how important Killua was to the business, he was sure they wouldn’t want to take any risks.

It clearly showed on the way his father was staring at him, with raised eyebrows, and on how he hesitated even the slightest bit when he replied.

“Yes, you are. You can’t be serious about this. And in ultimate instance, you know that if you die your ‘deathmate’ will die too, so seeing how much you care for him, it’s impossible you are actually planning on killing yourself.”

Knowing what his family thought about the marks and the supposed curse surrounding them, Killua had expected that remark, and so he had his answer ready.

“Yeah. Gon and I talked about it, and both agreed this was the best solution. It would be like a lovers’ suicide.” He slid his nails a little down his neck, making a trail of blood run along the skin from his new cut.

Of course that had been a lie. Gon didn’t know anything about what Killua was doing, but his father didn’t have to know that, and couldn’t assure he wasn’t telling the truth either.

Silva tried to remain collected, but Killua noticed how his lips slightly pressed together and a bit of a frown started appearing on his features, tiny details on his expression that not everybody would note, but that told the pale boy his idea was working.

The tension was palpable in the air, and Killua just pressed further, determined to win the argument this time.

“So?” Killua pushed, with a deathly glare in the eyes and his most menacing voice concentrated in that short word; his fingers piercing harder in his skin, making more blood to come out from the wound. “I think it’s a simple decision; you have nothing to lose and everything to win.” More blood came out of his neck, soaking the skin on it and his shoulder in thick red.

Both he and Silva knew it wasn’t enough to kill him, not yet at least, but the effect it produced was quite impressive, and before his father opened the mouth, Killua had the feeling that it worked.

“It’s okay, Killua. Pull your claws out.”

“Does that mean you’ll free him?” He asked harshly; he had to make sure before making any move.

Silva smirked, but the look on his eyes told Killua that the man had accepted his defeat.

“Well, you really did put me in a bind here, so you leave me no choice, right? And even if everything was just an act, something tells me that I shouldn’t contradict you in this issue. I think I’m not really aware of what you’d be capable of doing if I did, probably neither you are. So, I guess that yes; Gon can go.”

Killua slowly pulled his nails out of his neck, his gaze not leaving Silva’s.

“Good.” He plainly answered despite the immense relief that invaded him, but he just couldn’t show it in front of his father. He’d remain serious and collected until the end of the conversation.

“I recognize you did a good job here, and that kind of convincing performance can be useful for your future as the business heir. However, know that this won’t work again against me. It will be the first and last time that you push your selfish wishes against the rest of the family. You’ve been warned.”

Killua swallowed. Of course, he hadn’t expected anything different. But he kept up the appearances.

“Needless to say. And it’s not like I would fight you about something else.” He muttered the last sentence.

“Glad to know.” Silva commented. “If that was everything, you can leave.”

Killua briefly nodded and soon exited the room. He stopped in the middle of the hallway with his heart pounding hard in his chest, and he finally let out a sigh that he had been holding during the whole discussion. The whole tense atmosphere had put him more nervous than he liked to admit, but he maintained a perfect façade, and as a result he finally got Gon’s freedom. He allowed himself to feel a bit proud; after all, it was the first time that he won an argument against his father, and if this could be the only time he did in all his life, he was glad it had been to ensure Gon’s freedom and wellbeing.

But his happiness ended short when he thought that would be the last day he could spend with Gon. He didn’t want to say goodbye, but Gon couldn’t spent the rest of his life trapped in one room like Alluka had been for years and years, and much less being surrounded by his family. That wasn’t an option. And still, he didn’t know how to bring up the topic to the tanned boy, especially when Killua told him that he wasn’t going with him.

However, he’d tried to remain positive and happy, for Gon’s sake, and so as to make their farewell a bit easier. Thus, right after a quick visit to the bathroom to clean the blood on his neck, he forced a smile on his face and headed to his bedroom.

The moment he entered the room, Gon jumped from the couch where he had been watching a movie, and greeted Killua with a tight hug.

“Killua! What are you doing here? I thought you’d go directly on a mission after your morning training.” Gon was beaming, seemingly so happy and excited to spend more time with Killua than the little he had expected for the day.

Killua’s lips inevitably turned upwards at the sight; Gon’s cheerful smile was really contagious and Killua absolutely loved it.

“Yeah, but it can wait. I have good news. You’re finally free.”

Gon’s eyes shone brightly and his smile turned into an open-mouthed wide grin. He tightened his grip on Killua and planted a joyful kiss on his cheek.

“You’re the best Killua! How did you convince them? When-?” But his smile faltered as quickly as it had appeared, as he separated a little to look the pale boy directly in the eyes. “_I’m_ free? Not _we’re_? Killua, don’t tell me you’re staying here.”

Confusion tainted with sadness filled the previously bright and innocent honey brown eyes, and Killua found he couldn’t keep looking at them. He lowered his gaze and opened his mouth, not really sure how to start explaining.

“Gon-“

“No, Killua! You can’t stay with them! And we said we’d be leaving together, remember?” Gon pressed, holding him tighter to emphasize his words.

“Sorry Gon. But there’s no way my family let me go now that they’ve just retrieved me. This is the only way.” Killua explained in a defeated tone, still averting his eyes from the boy in front of him.

“No, it can’t be! We’ll think of something-“

Killua cut him off before he could continue on.

“We’ve already thought of everything. There’s nothing we can do.”

“No! I won’t accept it! Then, I’ll stay here with you until we come up with a plan. I can wait Killua, everything it takes, but I’m not leaving this place without you!” Gon stubbornly insisted.

Killua lost his patience at this point; he gritted his teeth before he let out.

“Yes, you’ll do; you have to leave Gon!” Killua shouted, louder than he had intended. He forced himself to lower the voice again before resuming; now staring right into Gon’s eyes. “It really is the only way, Gon, and I’ve worked so hard to get your freedom, so please, _please_, take it. You’re an outdoors person, nature is your element, and I clearly see how your anxiety and desire to go out grows bigger every day, even if you try to hide it. You can’t stay locked in this small room for any longer, not like Alluka has been for all her childhood. Neither of you deserve such treatment. And I… I would never forgive myself if you wasted your freedom in such a way. That’s why you have to go.”

“B-but-“

Before Gon could continue on, Killua shut him up with a kiss, a long kiss that tasted bittersweet in Killua’s lips. He only separated when he felt the wetness in Gon’s cheeks and the kiss turned salty with the taste of tears.

“_Please_.” The white haired boy pleaded, his voice breaking uttering that simple word. And now, tears were also running through his pale cheeks.

They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, their faces just inches apart and their cheeks wet from the tears that incessantly emerged from their eyes. They both saw in the other how their hearts broke at the idea of saying goodbye, this time for sure; but also how logic and understanding slowly settled in their minds.

Gon pressed his lips in a thin line, and with more tears escaping from his eyes, he nodded slightly, barely moving the head at all.

Killua caught the faint gesture and the corners of his lips twitched in a small sad smile. He reached forward and tenderly kissed Gon’s forehead. He looked Gon again in the eyes, and the words he should have said long ago, easily made their way out in a soft whisper.

“I love you.”

Gon’s lips parted and started trembling as his eyes were filled with new tears. He stretched Killua tight in his arms and buried his face on his chest. Killua held him even tighter, to the point that it almost hurt, but neither of them loosened his grip on the other.

“Y-you… you c-can’t say this b-before…” Gon stuttered against his chest. “I love you too, Killua. I love you. I love you so much!”

A genuine but sad smile appeared on Killua’s face, and tears continued rolling down his cheeks.

They stayed a long time just like this, holding tightly onto each other, not wanting to let go even the slightest bit. The pressure of their bodies meant they were still together, and neither of them wanted that to end.

It was Killua the one to finally pull a bit away. They looked at each other, sniffing, and Killua took Gon’s hands in his and gave them a reassuring squeeze.

“Come on; you must get ready.”

Gon held his hands tighter and let Killua drag him along the bedroom, getting all the things he needed. Killua prepared him a bag with some of his own clothes Gon had been wearing the last days, some money for the journey and even the last chocorobot from the new box he had bought the previous day – which of course, hadn’t lasted for more than 24 hours -. Gon tried to turn down the chocorobot, but Killua just wordlessly closed the bag and pulled it on one shoulder, as he took Gon’s hand again with his free one and pulled him out of the room.

They crossed the mansion’s stairs and hallways quickly, Killua not really wanting to come across some of his family members; but once outside, they slowed their pace, trying to make their walk last longer and so delay the moment of their farewell.

Killua heard Gon breathing the pure air of the mountain, and once again he told himself that he was doing the right thing, even if he knew his heart would break to pieces the moment Gon crossed the gate and disappeared from his view. He felt how Gon laced their fingers together in their joined hands, and Killua just pressed them tighter and stepped closer to the tanned boy, their shoulders bumping from time to time in their walk.

And they finally arrived to the Testing Gate, the place where their paths would part to never meet again.

They stared at the huge doors, their hands holding tightly against each other, perfectly knowing what came next and still reluctant to let go.

“It’s the time.” Killua whispered, and with a swift movement he took the bag from his shoulder and held it to Gon. Slowly, the tanned boy placed the bag on his own shoulder, and he moved to stand in front of Killua, now holding both of his hands in his. They stared at each other like this for a solid minute, not really knowing what to do or to say next; their last moments together before saying goodbye.

Killua took his phone from the pocket of his pants and placed it in Gon’s hand.

“Use it to make contact with Alluka. Just don’t turn it on until you reach the city down the mountain, to avoid that my brothers intercept the signal and follow you to get to her.” Gon just hummed in agreement and put the phone into his own pocket. “And… I know is too much to ask for, but… please, take care of Alluka. You are the only one that I can trust to look after her.”

“Of course; I’ll take care of her as if she was my own sister. I promise.” His eyes shone like melted gold under the sunlight, and Killua’s heart twisted painfully in his chest at knowing he wouldn’t be able to see those beautiful and bright eyes ever again.

“Thank you.” He muttered.

“And I promise you one other thing.” His hands tightened around Killua’s. “We’ll see each other again, Killua. I don’t know how, but I’ll find the way to save you from your family, and we’ll be together again. I promise.”

Killua felt shocked for a moment. Gon really didn’t know when to give up, did he? But contrary to what it should do, the thought managed to cheer him up the slightest bit, so he just replied.

“Please, don’t do anything stupid.”

“I won’t. But I’ll definitely save you, Killua.”

Gon held out his pinky finger and after a moment, Killua laced his own with it, sealing the statement in an unbreakable pledge. With the other hand, Gon cupped Killua’s cheek and kissed him deeply.

“It’s a promise.” He breathed against his lips, and Killua’s heart skipped a beat in his chest, wanting for just a tiny moment to believe what Gon said and to imagine they could have a future together. He desperately didn’t want to lose the only hope Gon was offering him.

Gon pulled back to look at Killua one last time in the eyes. The pale boy smiled, and everything was said without words.

Their joined hands by their pinkies laced entirely one last time. Gon started backing away, until their fingers slid against each other and their hands met nothing but the air around them. Gon smiled one last time, not his usual cheerful and toothy grin, but a much sadder, but also hopeful one; and Killua returned the gesture the best he could, putting all his effort in twitching his lips up when he felt they would start trembling at any moment.

Gon finally turned his back on Killua, opened the Testing Gate and disappeared in the woods.

Killua looked at his still stretched hand and his gaze landed on the sign that would forever connect him with the boy that had just left him. The sight of the flame mark made his eyes watery in an instant.

Slowly, he closed his eyes and let all the tears he had been holding finally out.


	22. Chapter 22

Gon disembarked from the dirigible with heavy steps and his mind so deep in his thoughts that he barely knew where his feet were leading him. It had been like that since the moment he abandoned the Zoldyck mansion, and with it, the white haired boy that had stolen his heart in the last weeks. He had reached a point in which he had run out of tears to cry, but even hours after his and Killua’s separation, his heart still clenched in his chest whenever he reminded their unexpected farewell and the new situation they were both in (that was to say it happened every few minutes, especially since he didn’t have anything else to occupy his mind with).

He shook his head trying to get rid of those thoughts and to focus on the present. Right; now that he had finally arrived to his destination, he couldn’t be distracted anymore. He had to pay close attention to his surroundings if he wanted to find them in that crowded space.

“Gon!”

The tanned boy heard his name just a fraction of second before landing his eyes on his friends. He had contacted Alluka the moment he left Kukuro Mountain and they had agreed to meet in the airport of Zushi’s home city, where Alluka had stayed with him for the last days. After a long day of traveling, Gon had finally arrived to the city, and found the pair already waiting for him between the crowds.

They both looked honestly concerned at first, but the moment their gazes met, their eyes showed nothing but relief on them. Alluka let go of Zushi’s hand that she had been holding until that moment, rushed to his side and welcomed Gon with an empathetic and tight hug.

“Thank God you’re okay.” She muttered against his shoulder.

“I am, but Killua…” The same overwhelming feeling that had haunted him since leaving his soulmate returned to him, now with double force, wrapping around his chest and hindering him to breath for a moment. He tightened his hold on the girl a little bit and when he felt he could talk again he just added in a trembling whisper. “I’m so sorry, Alluka.” He hid his face on the girl’s long hair and shut his eyes closed. He felt horrible; he shouldn’t be the one to return to Alluka’s side, it should be Killua, her brother. Somehow, this just felt wrong.

“Don’t be sorry. It was his decision. He sacrificed everything to save you; now, we have to do the same for him.”

They had already had a long conversation on the phone in which Gon had told his friends everything that had happened during his days trapped in the Zoldyck mansion and how Killua had ended Gon’s imprisonment by giving his own freedom in exchange. They didn’t hang up the call until both ends reassured the other that everything would be okay and they managed to calm down so no more shaky breaths were heard from the speaker.

Alluka’s words made him feel a bit better, but he still couldn’t help but feel guilty. Gon took a deep intake of air to steady himself from what felt like the thousandth time in the day, and quietly stated.

“Of course, we’re definitely going to save him. Thank you, Alluka.”

He meant it. He totally intended on keeping his promise this time; he wasn’t giving up on Killua so easily. Gon couldn’t stand the idea of Killua spending the rest of his life alone in that house, following the orders of his abusive family, especially more now that he knew by firsthand how they really worked. It wasn’t fair. Killua deserved to be free and happy and live his life as he wanted instead as his family wished, and Gon would make sure of that. He still didn’t know how, but he was willing to do anything and everything to achieve it.

But that wasn’t all. Of course his first motivation was to ensure Killua’s happiness and wellbeing, that would always be Gon’s priority; but he was aware he also had his own selfish motives to be so stubborn about this issue. He wanted to be with Killua. Their relationship had quickly developed through the days and weeks they’ve spent together, and although they have only known each other for barely a month, it felt like they were long time friends, the bond between them so strong by now that it was impossible to break, and the connection they shared through the marks on their wrists felt so real that it was almost tangible in the air. They were soulmates, and Gon was slowly starting to realize all the implications of it. They weren’t just friends or best friends, not even the word lovers seemed to capture in its meaning the whole true nature of their feelings; they were so much more than that, to the point that Gon couldn’t imagine his life without Killua standing by his side.

Alluka finally separated from him and flashed him a reassuring smile before letting go of him. Gon returned the gesture the best he could, his grin not coming out as naturally as usual, but he guessed it was only normal that he wasn’t in the mood for smiling in that moment.

Not even a second later, a new pair of arms wrapped around him, trapping him in a tight but quick hug, and it was only when it finished that Gon realized that it was Zushi the one who had approached and embraced him. His friend was still holding him by the shoulders, squeezing them a little bit, and stared at him with determination.

“I told it to Alluka before and now I repeat it to you, too. You’ll reunite with Killua, I know it, and I’ll help you with everything I can. You count on me for saving him.”

The proposition encouraged Gon for a moment, but didn’t last for long. Even if it was Zushi the one offering the help, he knew he couldn’t accept it. It would be dangerous and he couldn’t permit another of his friends getting hurt because of this matter, especially when it had nothing to do with him.

Gon carefully got Zushi’s hands off his shoulders and replied with an apologetic smile.

“Thanks Zushi. You’re a great friend, but that’s exactly why I can’t let you do this. I don’t want you to put yourself in danger and get hurt in the process, so it’s better if you don’t get involved in this.”

However, Zushi didn’t seem to back down at his words, but just the opposite. The short boy replaced his hands in Gon’s shoulders once again, now almost fiercely, and he insisted.

“Because I’m your friend I’m going to help you with this and you can’t change my mind. I know the risks and I choose to help you. And I’m already involved in this, anyway. Not only you are my friend and I want to help you, but also Alluka is my soulmate and I want her to have her brother back. So I’m definitely going to help you both.” Hazel eyes stared at his caramel ones with more determination than Gon had ever seen in them, but he instantly recognized it. It was the same determination that he himself felt about saving Killua, so intense and born out of friendship and love, and Gon knew in that moment that there was nothing he could do to stop Zushi, just as there was nothing anybody could do to stop him.

His eyes focused intently on Zushi’s and soon a smile involuntarily tugged at his lips.

“Well, if that’s the case, I guess I can’t refuse your help. Thanks a lot Zushi.”

At Gon’s acceptance, the short boy released the pressure on his shoulders and finally relaxed, softening the intense look on his eyes and making a nonchalant smile show on his face.

“So, what about if we head home now? I’m sure Gon is pretty tired after the long day, and he’s probably hungry, too.” Alluka intervened, after everything had been cleared out.

“Sure, let’s get going!” Zushi answered, letting go of Gon and already heading towards the airport’s exit stepping right next to Alluka. Gon quickly ran to the other girl’s side, to not be left behind, and just like this, the three of them entered the city and walked through its many streets that would lead them to Zushi’s place.

The rest of the evening was truly enjoyable. It had been so long since Gon had last been able to leisurely spend time between friends, and it seemed to be what he really needed in that moment. Of course he was still concerned about Killua and sad from their separation, but somehow his friends’ presence and the things they talked about managed to distract him a bit and ease those feelings for some time, and Gon was grateful for that. Before, there had been moments in which he thought he could have sunk in negativity and despair, but now, after his friends’ encouragements and offers to help, he felt much better; his heart was lighter in his chest and he was filled with hope and determination. And for this evening, he could just try to relax a little.

Gon quickly caught up with his friends and soon noticed some details that led him to wonder just how close Alluka and Zushi had become in the days they had spent together: Zushi pulling one of Alluka’s strands of hair behind her ear while she was busy cutting some vegetables for dinner; Alluka dragging Zushi by the hand to another room between laughs, to take something the boy had forgotten to bring to the kitchen; how they always stayed less than two feet apart, almost invading each other's personal space. It seemed that Alluka had even trusted Zushi enough to let him know about Nanika’s existence, as Gon noticed that said girl often changed places with Alluka and interacted with the short boy just as comfortably as the other girl did, and Zushi treated her just with the same care as he treated Alluka.

Gon couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips at the view. They really seemed to be happy around each other, and his friends’ happiness had always made Gon extremely glad. The pair reminded Gon of Killua and him, and he wondered if they also looked so happy together in someone else’s eyes. He hoped so, since he himself always felt overjoyed in his soulmate’s presence.

After they finished eating and the light conversation reached to an end, Alluka adopted a more serious expression and hesitantly asked.

“So, do you have any idea about how are we going to rescue onii-chan, Gon?”

The boy was a bit taken aback at the sudden change of topic, but he quickly answered in all honesty.

“Not really. I’m still not sure how we can take him away from that house given all the security your family has in it.”

“That’s right. Nanika and I have already thought about that; it would be impossible to enter the house and sneak out of it without them knowing. We need a different approach.” The girl confidently stated.

“So how can we do it? Do you know something that could work?” Zushi questioned.

“Actually, yes; we have kind of an idea.”

She explained to them her and Nanika’s plan and Gon immediately knew it was the best option to do and probably the only way they had to save Killua with real possibilities of success. It wouldn’t be easy, and it required quite some preparation, but if everything went according to the plan they’ll be able to have Killua back and his family would finally leave them alone once and for all.

“It sounds good. You girls did a great job thinking about this!”

“But, it’s very risky…” Alluka started, not really convinced about her own idea.

“I know, but if we prepare ourselves for it, it’s nothing we can’t handle.” Gon encouraged.

“I think Wing-san could help us with the training.” Zushi mumbled.

“That would be wonderful; we really need to be in perfect shape for the rescue. I know how strong they are, we can’t underestimate them.”

Zushi nodded in agreement.

“And for the first part of the plan, I know exactly the person that can help us with it.” Gon’s eyes moved to look at Alluka and with a smirk he declared. “I think it’s time to call Kurapika.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Again, sorry for the delay but I struggled quite a bit with this chapter and also wanted to write the next one before uploading this.  
We are near the end!! Probably will be two more chapters and an epilogue and I'll post them as soon as I have them written.  
See you soon ^^


	23. Chapter 23

The moon was high and full in the night, clear sky, bathing with its dim light Killua’s path just enough to be able to walk confidently in the darkness. Still, he was a professional, so even if it helped him, Killua was aware the moonlight could also betray him. Thus, he made sure to never leave the shadows, always stepping behind anything that could hide his presence in case the worst happened, his feet light as feathers in the concrete and not letting out even the slightest sound, as he moved with perfect stealth towards his target.

Yorknew streets felt so different in the middle of the night. Killua remembered the few days he had stayed there with Gon right after his and Alluka’s escape from their house and the atmosphere had been so lively then, but now, the city seemed to be dead. Of course, Killua didn’t complain; it would only make his work easier, but he somehow couldn’t shake off of him the uneasy sensation it induced in him. The place just brought him so many memories and it really wasn’t the time to feel nostalgic.

However, he couldn’t help it. He was reminded of Alluka when he passed next to a park with plenty of flowers, as though their petals were closed from the lack of sunlight, Killua instantly recognized them as one of his sister’s favorites. He wondered where she was on that moment. Given her curious and restless attitude, he liked to think that Gon and she had returned to their previous traveling routine and together they were exploring all the confines of the world, maybe even Zushi had joined them this time. But Killua just hoped that, wherever she was, his sister had finally got the happiness she deserved.

Thinking about Alluka, obviously led him to think about Gon, too. He recalled in his head all the good moments they had spent together: their first meeting at the river shore, their reencounter one day later at the same city he was currently in, their trips around various towns and countries, their sparring and how it ended with their first kiss and the many that followed behind, their first date and how it had been ruined by his stupid brother. And then, the separation and temporary reunion, the imprisonment in his family’s mansion, and separation once again, but this time, for good.

Those moments were all precious memories to Killua, and he highly cherished them. But also, it saddened him the fact that any of them would ever happen again, that those memories were the only things he had left; that Gon had turned into just another memory. He still remembered the promise Gon had made him just before leaving, that they would reunite again; and there was still a part of him that didn’t lose hope.

But four months had passed since then. Four long months of nothing but training and killing, the same as it had been for his sixteen years of life but somehow it felt so much worse now. Four excruciatingly long months of loneliness, pain and self-hatred, because now that he knew how wonderful life could be he didn’t want to kill anyone else. But he had made a deal for Gon’s freedom and he had accepted the consequences of it. He should get accustomed to his new reality; Killua knew better than to keep waiting like a damsel in distress for his prince to come rescue her. He was sure that Gon had tried, that he intended to keep his promise, but it had been a lot of time, and he was really starting to believe that that was it, that they’d never see each other again.

The thought still ached in Killua’s heart, somehow more painful than the tortures he had suffered through all his life. But that was fine. As long as Gon and Alluka were safe, everything was fine.

“Watch out.”

Long fingers wrapped around his arm and forcefully yanked him back until Killua’s back bumped into the other’s chest. He blinked and it took him a second to realize what had happened; he had been so submerged in his thoughts that he had unconsciously stepped in an unstable surface, his foot had slipped and he would have fallen from the roof if his brother hadn’t caught him in time.

“You’re distracted. Focus on the mission.”

Right, he had almost forgotten he was with him on that mission.

Killua immediately turned away from him and stood at what he considered a reasonable distance from his brother. He glared daggers at him and his nails instinctively sharpened as he deadpanned.

“Don’t touch me again.”

Illumi remained unfazed.

“Just be focused and I won’t have to. Come on, we’re almost there.”

He graciously jumped to the next roof, his long and silky hair floating in the air at the motion. After a second to calm down, Killua followed behind.

Soon enough they reached their destination, an abandoned theatre that they had been informed was now the base and hide spot for some mafia group that was enemy of the one their client belonged to. A quite common story based on Killua’s experience, and as always, the mission was to end them all. They were a large group, that was the reason why Illumi was accompanying him this time; though Killua insisted he didn’t need the help, but he just couldn’t contradict the client’s indications.

He took a deep breath and with a knot already forming in his stomach, he muttered.

“Let’s get this over.”

Killua stepped out of the shadows and hurried to enter the building through one of the broken windows, his brother following him close behind just as silently. They crossed the empty reception and carefully, soundlessly, the white haired boy opened one of the doors leading to the actual theatre. Lights were on, but he heard nothing, and when he dared to take a look in, he checked the room seemed to be empty. Good.

He sneaked inside and made his way to the stage, careful to move forward between the seats, in case there really was someone in the room and he hadn’t noticed. But nothing stopped them; it looked like the theatre room was really empty, what meant that all their targets had to be on the backstage.

Killua climbed to the stage and soon spotted the two doors that would lead to the rooms out of the public view. Perfect, he couldn’t wait to get rid of Illumi; he was so close at his back that he could almost feel his breath on his neck, what profoundly disgusted him. He hated it, he hated _him_ and just wanted his brother as far away as possible.

“I’ll take the door from the left; you go for the one on the right.” Killua muttered, not even turning to face the older Zoldyck and already walking towards his designed door before finishing the sentence.

A loud sound coming from right behind him made Killua stop on his tracks halfway in his path to the door. He quickly turned around, ready to face any kind of trap or ambush, but he certainly didn’t expect what he saw. His brother was on the floor, rubbing his cheek with his hand as if he had just received a punch in the face. But nobody else was to be seen on the stage.

The same sound from before startled Killua again, and now, he saw how a fist appeared out of nowhere in the air above Illumi’s head and punched his brother, knocking him to the floor once again. Killua’s eyes widened in shock, after all it wasn’t every day that his brother was deceived this way and got punched in the face. However, according to their client’s information, none of the mafia members were Nen users. So, what the hell was happening?

Killua prepared for battle, electric sparks already emerging from his body; but his fighting stance was suddenly lost when he registered the next movement from the enemy, and he was met with a familiar figure instead of a random fighter. It all happened in less than a second. A bright, orangish light came out from the ceiling and rapidly went down aiming at Illumi, who was still on the floor. However, the intense light had warned his brother of the new attack, and he rolled on the floor just in time to avoid it. The stage cracked under the failed strike, and when the light subdued a spiky haired boy Killua knew so well had joined the two brothers in the abandoned theatre. His heart skipped a beat in his chest and his eyes widened with genuine surprise.

It couldn’t be.

“Gon.” He breathed, his lips forming the familiar name before even being conscious of it.

Killua couldn’t believe it. He was right there, he had found him. And he was fighting Illumi. Was that his plan for saving him? What was he thinking? Illumi was way too strong for him; he didn’t have a chance to win. Gon would only end up injured from this confrontation.

Gon took a quick glance in his direction and flashed him a cheerful smile before turning his attention again to Illumi, who was slowly getting up from the floor. Killua’s heart clenched in his chest for a moment, but he obliged himself to focus on the important issue.

“What- what are you doing, idiot?! You know you can’t win against him. Just hurry up and leave before he kills you!”

“I’m not going anywhere without you Killua.” Gon deadpanned. The bluntness and honesty of those words made Killua’s knees go weak for an instant. “I came here to save you, and I’m going to keep my promise. You don’t have to worry; I’m stronger now and also, I’m not alone. If we all work together, we’ll definitely defeat him and you’ll be finally free.”

Gon’s voice radiated confidence and power and it made Killua slowly believe that his words could come true. Gon had come all this way just for him, to save him. He surely had a plan; and the least Killua could do was to trust and help him with it as he asked him to do.

“You can’t really believe that, right Killu? You’ve both tried to fight me before and none of you have ever done the slightest damage to me, so what makes you think-?”

The same noise from earlier sounded again and the fist appeared once again in the air, now targeting at Illumi’s stomach. But his brother wouldn’t be deceived thrice with the same technique, so he quickly dodged the attack, but only to be met with Gon’s kick instead. Being an enhancer, the attack sent Illumi flying back to the rows of seats with more strength than Killua had seen Gon ever use. It was impressive. He wasn’t lying; he really had become stronger in the past months.

Killua smirked. Now he had it clear. They really could do this.

Illumi got up from where he had landed and glared at Gon with his normally expressionless eyes, now showing bits of anger and hatred on them.

“Guess I won’t have to hold back with you. Don’t say I haven’t warned you.”

“Oh, shut up.” Killua cut him off as he released his Nen in the form of countless lightning bolts and sparks all around him, pure electricity running through his whole body.

“You will regret this, Killu.”

“I said, _shut up_.”

He stared at him with his well-trained assassin expression for a moment, and the next one he activated his Godspeed, jumped in the air and directed at his brother a blast of powerful lightning strikes. He dodged them all but the last one, but unfortunately, it did little to no effect, as Illumi quickly recovered from it and launched forward to the stage, ready to make the counterattack. Gon intercepted him, and started to fight him in close combat.

Even as a manipulator, Illumi had almost the power of an enhancer, the hits he landed on Gon nearly as strong as the punches the tanned boy managed to direct at him. But Illumi was faster and counted with more battle experience than Gon did, so him alone, he couldn’t win against him. But the thing was, he wasn’t alone.

From time to time, the mysterious fists kept coming back from nowhere and tried to punch Illumi, sometimes succeeding, and other times failing but distracting him for the exact second Gon needed to land a hit of his own on the man. Killua also helped whenever Gon left him an opening, attacking from all kind of different angles, sometimes using his electric powers and other times just using the assassin techniques he had known since he was a child.

Minutes passed and the battle continued as heated as it had started. Killua couldn’t tell which side was winning, but one thing was for sure; they were exhausting Illumi. It was something Killua had never seen happening before, and it only encouraged him to keep fighting. Of course, Killua was also starting to feel tired, but he simply ignored it. He couldn’t stop now, not when they had a real chance of winning, not when they were closer than ever to victory, not when the possibility of returning back to Gon and Alluka’s side depended on this.

But just then, the course of the battle started to change.

The fist appeared again in the air, but this time, rather than dodge the attack, Illumi grabbed it by the wrist and stuck one of his needles on it, causing it to disappear. Even so, Gon tried to take advantage of the situation and aimed a kick at the other’s head, but only to be blocked. In less than a second, Illumi took out another of his needles and threw it at the tanned boy, who managed to dodge it in the last moment, but in consequence, left his side open and Illumi attacked him with all his strength, sending Gon flying to the other side of the stage.

Killua gritted his teeth; his brother was starting to win and he couldn’t permit it. He advanced quickly towards Illumi and directed another of his thunderbolts to his brother’s back, hitting him straight on it. It managed to paralyze him for a moment, but soon Illumi turned around and faced Killua. The darkness on his eyes was deeper than ever.

“You haven’t learnt a thing from what I’ve taught you, have you? Stop now, Killu; and I will forget this little act of rebellion.”

His brother said so, but he was clearly struggling to appear all composed and uninjured. They had made it this far, Killua was not backing away now. The situation wasn’t the best, but if they pushed a little further, if they kept fighting a little longer, they could defeat him.

His cerulean eyes flashed in a new shade of blue, way brighter and filled with so much power due to the new wave of electricity that ran through his veins and sparkled in every cell of his body.

“Never.”

He activated his Godspeed once again and landed attack after attack on Illumi, faster than he’d ever moved in his life. The hits and kicks weren’t as powerful as Gon’s, but he moved so rapidly that his brother couldn’t see him, even less intercept the attacks or dodge them. Killua went on until his muscles became sore and he was so out of breath that he couldn’t continue for any longer. With a final punch, he jumped back, putting some distance between him and his brother.

He stared at Illumi hoping to see him all beaten up, but even if clearly wounded, he still somehow remained on his feet. Illumi snorted, but before he could say anything, one final punch went directed to him coming from the ceiling, impacting so brutally on his head that it knocked him down to the floor. Killua needed a second to process what had happened, but once he recognized Gon’s figure immobilizing Illumi against the floor, he realized that Gon had just tried again his first attack, now using Zetsu followed by Ko on his fist instead of his special technique Jajanken so that Illumi wouldn’t discover and frustrate his plan once again.

“Zushi, now!” Gon shouted.

The boy in question suddenly appeared from behind one of the doors in the stage and a pair of ropes -that strangely looked very much like karate belts- came flying towards Illumi and wrapped around him in no time, completely immobilizing his brother’s entire body. The man squirmed under the ropes, but it was useless, since it was clear that they were impregnated with Nen, meaning Illumi wouldn’t break free from them unless Zushi allowed it.

A wide grin showed on Killua’s features. They did it. They defeated Illumi and now he wouldn’t be able to stop him from going with Gon and Alluka. He’d finally disappear from his brother’s view, and without his obnoxious needles on him anymore, he wouldn’t be able to find them this time. He'd vanish from his family’s radar once and for all.

He turned to face Gon, ready to share his excitement with him, but he stopped on his tracks when instead of the cheerful and radiant expression he was so used to see on him, he was met with a rather serious mood; his whole body was tense staring at Illumi with an increasing scowl in the face and eyes darker than ever, showing nothing but hatred on them.

Killua felt like all the air disappeared from his lungs.

He knew that look. It was the same look he had grown up surrounded with and been forced to practice all his life, but now intensified with growing loathing. The look of an assassin.

Killua had no doubt about it.

Gon was going to kill Illumi.


	24. Chapter 24

The moment Gon saw Illumi finally immobilized on the floor at his feet, he was filled with immense rage.

He had expected to feel joyful, proud, or even nothing and just run away from that place by the hand with Killua. But instead, all the hatred he had accumulated for the man before his eyes came to him like a tsunami and an only thought occupied his mind.

He had to kill him.

He recalled how Illumi had tortured him, how he had manipulated Killua’s mind for his convenience making him feel inferior, weak and fearful to the point of giving him nightmares. All the problems they had to endure since they met were his fault. He had made them suffer. He had made _Killua_ suffer through all his life, and that was unforgivable. He needed to pay; he simply couldn’t continue living after everything he had done.

He had to kill him.

Without thinking, his hands flew to his side and Gon started preparing his Jajanken, totally ready to give the scum still squirming on the floor the final blow. He gathered even the last bit of power on his fist, the whole room getting tainted with orange and yellow hues as the attack charged to its full intensity. He had never used so much power before and he had no doubt it would be enough to kill anyone, even the untouchable Illumi.

He was about to land the ‘rock’ version of Jajanken on Illumi when he felt a gentle and familiar hand on his shoulder.

“It’s enough, Gon. Please stop.”

Just hearing that voice he had missed so much during the last four months, managed to take him out of his killing intent, and the light coming from his attack promptly died on his hand. He stared at Killua, who watched him with worry and a glint of fear in the eyes. Gon was confused. Why was Killua looking at him that way? Why was he stopping him?

“Why? Don’t you want him dead? After everything he’s done he deserves it.”

“I know, and-“

_He knew?_ No, Gon didn’t understand. He was getting furious and his Nen started to swirl around him like a dark aura.

“Then why are you stopping me?! Let me end him once and for all.”

“No Gon, I can’t let you-“

His rage just intensified, as well as the darkness emerging from his body.

“You want to spare his life because he’s your brother? Is that? Are you going to forgive him after all?!” He shouted, starting to lose his patience.

Killua abruptly made him turn to look him directly in the eyes and grabbed him by the shoulders with force and decision before letting out.

“Gon, stop! Listen to me! It’s not that I’ve forgiven him and I don’t care one bit whether he lives or dies. If I’m telling you to stop is not for him, but for you!”

And _that_ made Gon finally stop and come to his senses, even if just a bit. The dark aura coming from him slowly dissipated in the air and he just focused on the boy who was intently staring at him with those breathtaking blue eyes of his. Killua inhaled, and once he saw Gon had calmed down, he resumed in a lower and softer voice.

“It’s for you, Gon. I don’t want you to live with the weight and the responsibility of having killed someone, even if it’s Illumi the one we’re talking about. I don’t want you to become an assassin like I am, believe me, it’s not worth it. So please Gon, don’t do it. We’ve already won, so let’s just go and leave him here, okay?”

Killua glared at him with silent pleading eyes and such a soft expression that Gon would have never believed he used to be an assassin if he hadn’t known it from before. Truth was Killua’s words had shocked him a bit, but he was slowly starting to understand, so he decided to trust Killua and do as he said, even if the rage still lingered at the corners of his heart.

Because Killua was more important than any kind of revenge desire Gon could have.

He slowly nodded as a soft smile tugged at his lips, intended just for Killua, and the white haired boy immediately mirrored it. And for an instant, the world seemed to stop and it was just the two of them.

Until Illumi broke the spell with his unnecessary talking.

“It really is a shame how despite all the power you have, you are a failure as an assassin, Killu. Well, it’s that, or you don’t kill me because deep down you still like me as your brother.”

Everything happened so fast that Gon almost didn’t have the time to register Illumi’s words before Killua launched to his brother and pinned him hard to the floor, pushing one knee against his chest and gripping his neck tightly with one hand, as the other was morphed into a sharp claw that menacingly stayed so close to his face.

“Say one more word and I’ll cut your neck in half; you know I’m perfectly capable of it.” Killua spitted the words with his most threatening voice. “And to make it clear, I _hate_ you. If I don’t kill you is because you are not worth it. Besides, I’d love to see dad’s expression when you return home and you tell him that you lost against me and I got free. So. Who is the failure now?”

Apparently, Illumi got he was being serious and remained silent. Gon noticed how Killua sank his nails a bit on his brother’s neck before releasing him and getting up without giving him another glance. Instead, his ocean eyes only looked at Gon, softening around the edges with each second it passed.

“It’s over. Let’s get out of here.”

“Wait.” Gon blurted before even knowing what he was doing. Somehow, he didn’t feel satisfied leaving things like this. He needed to let out all his anger and hatred for Illumi in some way.

He approached Illumi and seeing his composed expression Gon was suddenly filled with the urge to punch him; and that’s exactly what he did. For the third time that night, the room was filled with orange, and faster than ever, he landed his fist with his Jajanken on Illumi’s face, with the exact amount of strength to not kill him and just drive him unconscious.

“What-?!” Killua started, but Gon quickly cut him off, already rushing to his side.

“_Now_, it’s over. Don’t worry, he’s just unconscious; but man, that punch just felt so good!”

The pale boy laughed loudly at his comment and a huge smile showed on Gon’s features in response. Killua’s laugher had a special tingling in it, and only then Gon realized how much he had missed it, how much he had missed Killua.

“I guess so.” Killua replied, still giggling.

And Gon couldn’t stop himself anymore. He excitedly launched forward and trapped Killua in a tight hug. Killua, surprised by the sudden action, tripped over his feet and both of them fell back to the floor. Their foreheads knocked at the impact, but when they looked at each other in the eyes, a new burst of laugher escaped from their lips and they just held tightly onto each other as their chuckles continued.

Finally, they were together again.

It felt surreal, but the long months of planning and intense training proved to be worth it in the end. Killua was back, back with him. Gon felt it in the arms circling tightly around his waist; the smell of ozone that remained in pale skin from their battle before, that masked Killua’s own scent but he still perceived it perfectly nonetheless; the warmth irradiating from the body pressed against him; the light breaths, quiet giggles and pounding heartbeat that matched his own. Everything was so familiar and his brain was now full of it; full of Killua, Killua, Killua.

“I missed you so _so_ much, Killua.” Gon muttered as he stretched the boy even tighter in his arms.

“Me too, you have no idea.” As in response, Killua also tightened his hold on him. “But you kept your promise; you saved me.”

“Of course, Killua.” Gon lifted his head just enough to stare at Killua’s eyes, melted gold lost in the depths of ocean blue, their faces so close that their noses were almost brushing. “I know it took me some time, but I sealed the promise with a kiss, and with a kiss-“ Closing his eyes, he bent down to press his lips against Killua’s, in a sweet and longing kiss. “- I fulfill it.”

He rested his forehead against Killua’s and cupped pale cheeks with his tanned hands. Gon was smiling so much that his cheeks were starting to hurt, but he just couldn’t stop. Underneath him, Killua blushed slightly but soon enough a soft grin showed on his face, revealing he was just as happy as Gon was for their reunion.

“Come on lovebirds, let’s get out of here. This place is giving me the creeps.”

The comment startled Gon for a second and made him remember that they were not alone. They both reluctantly separated from each other, and sitting on the floor they stared at the two friends that had helped Gon in battle and now were waiting for them to finally go back home.

“Leorio!” Zushi nudged the man on the ribs for his insensitive comment that had broken the atmosphere between the two boys.

“What?! Are you comfortable staying here, in an abandoned building and with the creepy guy unconscious in the floor just a few meters next to you? Because I’m definitely not!” He turned to face Killua. “Oh and, hi brat, nice to see you’re alright. I’m glad the plan worked.”

“Hey old man, sure it’s nice being back.”

“Who are you calling old man?!”

“Obviously you-“

Gon observed their bickering with amusement, trying to hide the smile tugging at his lips and miserably failing.

“Guys, stop!” Zushi intervened. “Let’s just go, Alluka and Kurapika are waiting for us.”

At the sound of the girl’s name, Killua immediately stood up and asked.

“Alluka? Where is she?”

Gon imitated Killua, standing next to him, and he answered.

“She’s in the apartment. She wanted to come but we finally convinced her to stay back since it would be too dangerous and Illumi could easily find her if she hid in someplace here.”

Killua sighed in relief.

“Great, I can’t wait to see her! Let’s go!”

He took Gon’s hand and hurriedly ran out of the building, dragging him right behind. Gon soon caught him, and together, hand in hand, they rushed through dark and empty streets to Alluka’s encounter. They were vaguely conscious of the other two following them behind and asking them to slow down, but Killua was euphoric, so excited to see his sister after so long, and Gon caught in his enthusiasm, since Killua’s happiness was also his own.

They didn’t stop until they arrived to Leorio’s and Kurapika’s apartment. They halted at the door and Gon squeezed Killua’s hand and flashed him a cheerful smile before the pale boy took a breath to steady himself and finally knocked on the door.

Rushed steps were heard from behind the door, and it harshly opened to reveal a girl in a pink dress and with disheveled hair. Her sky blue eyes widened and she squealed before jumping onto Killua, who caught her tight in his arms and happily span her around. Gon stayed a bit behind and watched the scene with endearment. It still felt like everything was a dream and he would wake up at any moment to a crude reality in which Killua wasn’t with him. But it wasn’t a dream; Gon knew this was real. Killua was right there, again with them, again with him. And he wasn’t going anywhere this time.

Zushi and Leorio finally arrived to the apartment, panting heavily after the long run, and once together they entered the place to also be met with Kurapika, who had stayed behind to make the girl some company since his Nen had many restrictions, so his help wasn’t really needed for the battle. They soon explained him and Alluka how the rescue had developed and both were delighted and relieved to know that everything had gone according to the plan.

“But we all helped!” Gon informed Killua. “Leorio, Zushi and I were the ones to carry out the rescue, but the plan itself was Alluka’s and Nanika’s idea, and also it wouldn’t have been possible without Kurapika’s help. He asked one of his work contacts to make the mission’s request in a way your family would never suspect it was fake and he also taught Zushi how to use his manipulation Nen on his belts, since it’s pretty similar to the conjuration Nen he uses on his chains. Oh, and we also stayed some time with Wing-san and he helped us with the training.”

“Thank you.” Killua sincerely said after a moment, his gaze turning to everyone in the room. “I-I would have never managed to escape from my family if it wasn’t for you. I could never thank you enough for what you’ve done for me.”

Gon smiled and placed his hand over Killua’s, slowly caressing his knuckles with his thumb and lacing their fingers together. Alluka, sitting on the other side next to her brother, held his free hand with both of hers in a reassuring way.

“There’s no need to. You’re important to us, Killua; you’re important to me. I’d never have abandoned you in that house; neither of us would have permitted it.” Everyone agreed with Gon with different levels of nodding, reassuring smiles and comforting pats on Killua’s shoulder.

Something shone on his deep blue eyes, and Gon, knowing Killua as he did, instantly recognized it. It was the realization that he was important, that he had friends apart from Gon and Alluka, that there were people wishing for his well-being and willing to do anything for his sake, just to make him happy. And Gon was glad that Killua finally acknowledged and accepted it, because he was amazing and deserved to feel loved.

It was a night Gon would never forget, filled with friendly hugs, cheerful smiles, animated talking and some jokes here and there. Joy was floating in every corner of the room and despite the late hours, they stayed up until they ran out of the last bit of energy in their bodies. One by one, his friends succumbed to slumber leaning against someone else’s side and heads lying on another’s shoulders, sleeping peacefully as hairs and limbs tangled together in the small space provided by the couch.

At some point, Gon and Killua were the only ones that remained awake. The latter shifted his position in the loveseat he was sharing with Gon and, mirroring the scene before them, he rested his head on the other’s shoulder. The tanned boy also made himself comfortable, embracing Killua in his arms and dropping his head on top of his white puff of hair. Killua snuggled closer and Gon held him a bit tighter against him, erasing any possible distance that there could have been between their bodies, as if wanting to make up for all the time they had been apart.

And just like this, surrounded by his friends and with Killua in his arms, everything felt perfect.

His eyelids started to feel heavy and before sleep took him to Morfeo’s realm, Gon whispered.

“Killua?”

The pale boy just hummed in response, his voice already drowsy and his breathing calm and rhythmic against his chest.

“We’ll stay together from now on, right?”

“Yeah, I’d like that. I don’t want to separate ever again.” He took Gon’s hand on his and slowly intertwined their fingers together. “So from now on it’ll be the two of us, together.”

Gon smiled softly at Killua’s words; he didn’t wish for anything more.

“Promised?”

Without doubt, Killua answered in a murmur.

“Promised.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh, I struggled a lot with this chapter, especially the second half of it. Somehow I was never totally convinced with it, and I kept adding and changing things over and over. So after a lot of editing, this is how the chapter ended up. Just hope you liked it! ^^
> 
> And OMG I can't believe that I'm almost done with this fic. Just the epilogue is left, guys!!!


	25. Epilogue

_Six months later_

"I'm so full! I swear if I eat one more bite my stomach is gonna explode."

"Well, if you aren't going to finish that cake you can always give it to me."

"Serve yourself.”

Without thinking it twice, Killua eagerly took the plate with the dessert away from his sister and started shoveling big pieces of cake inside his mouth. The sweet flavor melted in his tongue and he emitted a little pleased sound before swallowing the delicious dessert.

Alluka, sitting at his left, just watched him devour what remained of her former cake, what took him just a few seconds to finish. Killua closed his eyes for a moment and smiled, the taste of strawberry mixed with cream still lingering in his mouth, when he heard his sister giggling.

Killua snorted.

“I can’t believe that after teaming up with Kurapika and insisting so much to Leorio to get the strawberry cake as dessert you didn’t even finish your own serving.”

“Agh, I know, okay? Please, don’t remind me. The cake was really delicious, I know we did the right choice, but I just can’t eat anything more.” She let out a long sigh and then looked at her brother with a mix of disbelief and amusement in her expression. "What I can't believe is that after everything we've eaten you still had place for a second piece of cake."

"Alluka, you should have known by now that I have a second stomach reserved just for sweets. And it's infinite." The girl laughed harder at her brother's answer.

"Okay, I'll make sure to remember for next time." Her gaze slid behind Killua, and still smiling she added. "Looks like Gon has a second stomach, too."

Killua turned to his right, where the boy in question stopped his fork midway to his mouth at the sound of his name. He smiled sheepishly at the two siblings and replied.

"Nah, I don't think so; that's just a Killua thing. Actually, I'm starting to feel pretty full."

"You need help with that?" Killua suggested with a smirk, eyes already locked on Gon's cake.

Gon just laughed at Killua's obvious attempt to get more sugar in his body. Killua opened his mouth, but before any words escaped his lips, Gon placed his fork inside it. The pale boy, surprised by the sudden action, couldn't help the light blush that spread through his cheeks, but ate the cake nonetheless, the sweet flavor on his tongue making his embarrassment somehow worth it. Still, Killua glared at Gon, silently warning him not to do it again, but Gon just smiled as cheerfully and nonchalantly as always and prepared another bite to feed him.

However, before Gon could offer it to him or Killua could snap the fork out of Gon's grasp and eat the dessert himself, everybody in the room started getting up from their seats and heading out, presumably towards the source of the music that had started playing in the distance.

"Ohh it's the time for the dance!" Alluka exclaimed, her eyes shining with emotion. Killua smiled softly at her excitement; he knew very well this was the part of the day she had been looking forward the most. She immediately stood up, the beads on her front strands of hair clacking a bit at the quick motion, and took the hand of the boy that had been silently eating his dessert at her other side, yanking him in the direction everyone was heading. "Let's go Zushi! We're gonna own the dance floor!"

Zushi yelped a bit following Alluka, clearly not nearly as convinced or enthusiastic as the girl was. But in the last months, Killua had witnessed many times how the boy would do anything in his power to make his sister happy, and that day was no different, as Zushi smiled and hurried to step next to Alluka. He told her something that Killua couldn't make in the now considerable distance separating them, but he noticed how the girl laughed at her soulmate in reply, until together they finally disappeared from his view.

It had taken him some time to fully admit it, but Zushi had managed to earn Killua’s whole trust and acceptance. He wasn’t blind. He knew the boy cared dearly about his sister and would do anything for her, and Alluka herself always seemed happier, even more than usual, in Zushi’s presence. If the marks on their wrists meant they had the same feelings as Gon and him had for each other -and it obviously looked like that was the case- then Killua could only smile at them and wish for their happiness. After all, that was what he had always wanted, for his sister to be happy.

Killua finally tore his eyes away from where the two young teens had disappeared and turned to Gon, who was already on his feet, his hand outstretched for him to take and his characteristic grin showing on his face. Just Gon in his purest form. Without words and the beginning of a smile tugging at his lips, Killua laced their fingers together; the gesture so familiar by now that it had become second nature to them, and he stood up next to the tanned boy, ready to follow the mass of people that was leaving the dining room.

“Wait a moment.”

Gon stepped closer to him and before Killua could guess what the other intended; he felt a pair of lips on the corner of his mouth and a warm tongue on his skin. It lasted just for a brief second and still made Killua incredibly flustered, his normally pale cheeks slowly getting tainted in a bright red.

“Wh-what are you doing, idiot?!” He stuttered, but Gon only stared at him with a not-so-innocent smile.

“What, can’t I kiss my boyfriend?”

Killua felt his heart jump in his chest and the blush on his face only intensified.

“You- you know that’s not it!” That was a stupid question and Gon knew it. Just like holding hands, kissing had become quite a common practice in their relationship. From good morning and good night kisses, to stolen kisses in between day-to-day activities and sometimes long hour sessions they spent just doing exactly that, kissing and nothing else. Gon knew he loved their kisses, and Killua knew Gon loved them just as much; so that wasn’t it. It was just-. “Just don’t do it so suddenly; and not here, with so many people around!”

Gon blinked and snorted, shaking a bit his head as if he couldn’t believe what Killua was telling him.

“Killua, the room is empty.”

The pale boy turned his head, checking his surroundings. The place was really empty except for the two of them. He had been so focused on Alluka and then on Gon that he hadn’t noticed the moment when the last person had exited the room, leaving them completely alone in the large space.

Knowing this, he felt the blush on his cheeks rapidly fade and a sigh of relief escaped from his lips. He then looked again at the boy in front of him, who was still staring at him with a glint of amusement in the eyes, and Killua smirked.

“You know, if you wanted to kiss me do it properly.”

Killua cupped both of Gon’s cheeks with his hands and smashed their lips together. He felt more than heard a soft hum escaping Gon’s mouth, and a pair of arms quickly sneaked around his waist, welcoming the kiss and holding him tight. Killua caressed freckled cheeks with his thumbs and buried his fingers in spiky hair as he pressed their lips closer. It was a deep, long kiss that tasted like strawberries and warmed Killua’s entire being.

Gon was the first to break the contact, when his lips curled upwards at the oncoming of a smile. Hands remained in place and their faces were so close that everything Killua could see were Gon’s bright caramel eyes staring intently into his own.

“I was joking, you know; the thing from before wasn’t supposed to be a kiss. You just had a bit of cake on the corner of your mouth and I just took it off for you.” Gon explained with a smug look on the face.

“What?!”

Gon just giggled and planted a quick kiss on his cheek. He took his hand and without giving any more explanation, he dragged a confused and flustered Killua out of the dining room to join the rest of the people.

The music room was so spacious, filled with few but elegant decorations; but being the two grooms from the highest Hunter positions -two Zodiacs no less- it only made sense that they would celebrate their wedding in such a sophisticated place. The floor was so highly polished you could see yourself reflected on it and the walls were decorated with big windows covered with long red velvet curtains falling to the floor. In between them, there were some paintings attached to the walls, and hanging from the ceiling was the biggest chandelier Killua had ever seen in his life, exactly above the couple dancing to the music filling the air.

The newlyweds were the center of attention in the room, the only ones dancing among the many guests that had assisted to the celebration and were now silently observing how the couple danced their first vals together as husbands. Killua couldn’t help the genuine smile that showed on his face. Kurapika and Leorio, both in incredibly fitting navy blue and black tuxedos respectively, moved easily through the dance floor, spinning in circles with practiced skill. And they looked overjoyed, what was a good change in their expressions, since their jobs consumed them quite a lot and Killua had seen them stressed and tired more than he had seen them happy and smiling. But this day was just for them, and he was glad they were enjoying it.

The song ended soon after, and so the grooms’ vals, Leorio deciding to put an end to their dance dipping Kurapika in his arms, a move that was probably unplanned seeing the blonde’s surprised expression, though it was quickly replaced by his restrained laughter. The moment the music died, a big wave of applause burst from the guests, congratulating the married couple for their dance, Gon at his side giving some of the loudest cheers.

The music resumed just a few seconds later with the beginning of a new melody, but now, the starring couple of the day left the spotlight and a good part of the guests paired up and started dancing to the sound of the cheerful notes. Killua immediately spotted Alluka among the crowd, happily dancing with Zushi, moving from left to right and making her beautiful pink dress sway between her legs like it was a part of her, creating an almost magical view. She looked like a princess taken out of a fairy tale dancing with her prince charming; and just for that day, she could indulge herself to live in that fantasy.

“Well, how are you? Enjoying the party?”

Killua turned and found that Kurapika and Leorio had retreated themselves to the same corner of the room Gon and he were in and had approached them to talk.

“I think we should be the ones asking you that; it’s your wedding after all.” Gon retorted cheerfully.

The married couple chuckled a bit as they laced their hands in a firm grip, their new rings meeting in the hold and shining proudly under the warm light that bathed the whole room.

“Yes, of course I am. This is the happiest day of my life.” Kurapika said, smiling softly at his husband.

“Mine too.” Leorio added, in an equally soft tone.

They kept staring at each other, and for a moment, it felt like they had forgotten about the two boys they were talking to. Leorio shook his head a bit then and focused again on Gon and Killua.

“Okay, but enough about us. What are you doing here, in this lonely corner?! Go dance like the rest!”

For a moment, Killua didn’t know what to say, but just then, Gon grasped the opportunity and turning to him, he formally asked.

“May I have this dance?” The palm of his hand was up and his head lowered in a slight bow, though Killua could perfectly see the playful grin tugging at his lips.

From the corner of his eye, he could see Kurapika and Leorio observing the scene with something close to fondness on their expressions. Really, Gon was such a sap sometimes.

“Silly.” He just let out in a soft voice, as he took Gon’s hand in his and wordlessly yanked him to the dance floor. Behind them, he could hear Leorio shouting ‘Have fun!’ over the loud music, but Killua pointedly ignored it and kept making his way to the center of the music room.

Once they reached a good spot, they stood in front of each other. Killua placed one hand on Gon’s shoulder as Gon slid one of his own around Killua’s waist, while their free hands laced together at their sides, tanned and pale skin intertwining perfectly as if being one and only.

They started slow; swaying a bit from left to right and moving in small circles following the music’s rhythm. It didn’t require much of Killua’s attention, so instead, his thoughts inevitably went to Gon.

He was gorgeous that day -not that he normally wasn’t, if you asked Killua- but Gon had dressed up for the occasion and he was so handsome in a suit. Even if it was a dark green suit, because it seemed as if Gon couldn’t wear any other color, but somehow it fitted him. Killua doubted there was anyone who could look so good only wearing green, but there Gon was, defying fashion with his stubbornness and still looking great. The color of the suit matched the green of the tips of his hair, and contrasted perfectly with his caramel eyes, which were shining brightly under the warm light.

The music quickened a bit and so did the pace of their dance, but it was still easy for Killua to follow the rhythm. One step forward, one to the left, then back and again. His feet were moving almost on their own, because Gon was smiling at him and Killua couldn’t care about anything else when Gon looked at him like that, like Killua was the most precious being in the world.

Though to be honest, he was probably looking at Gon the same way.

Even after their reunion six months ago and everything they had been through since then, sometimes it still felt like he was living a dream. Killua couldn’t be that lucky to have someone as good as Gon at his side, who wanted to be with him, who _loved_ him as he was and have never looked at him with fear or disgust as many other people did, even after knowing everything about his family and his past. And yet, the light and gentle pressure he felt against his waist and the warmth flowing against the palm of his hand were irrefutable proof that it was all real.

So were the memories from the last months.

Right after their reunion, Gon, Alluka and he had resumed their travelling routine, partly because it was the best measure against the almost non-existent possibility of his family finding them again, but mostly because they enjoyed a lot visiting new places and wanted to discover every part of the world. But, however incredible those days had been for the three of them, after some months, it ended up being a bit tiring, and since it was clear his family had completely lost track of them, they decided it was time to finally settle up and try a new type of lifestyle.

They rented an apartment in a quite big city and they started their new lives there. Without constantly moving anymore, Alluka started going to school with Zushi, who had joined them after having become a floor master in Heavens Arena and therefore, finishing his training with Wing. The two of them had quickly made some friends there, and Killua was glad to see that his sister was finally living a normal teenager life, just like he knew she had always wanted.

As for Gon and Killua, they started working, since they needed money for a living. Killua soon found a job at a local coffee shop; he wasn’t paid much, but still being a teenager was the best he could find, and it was nice and enough for the moment. Gon, instead, made use of his Hunter license and started working as such, what ended up being their main source of money, but also meant he sometimes had to leave the city to get the work done. It wasn’t very often, because Gon avoided missions outside the city as much as he could, but sometimes they had no choice. Days without Gon were always less bright and much more boring, but the tanned boy always returned as soon as possible and then Killua’s chest flooded again with immense joy and warmth when he hugged him again and said ‘Welcome back’.

A sudden weight on his feet sent a wave of pain through his nerves and Killua instantly came back to the present.

“Ouch! Gon, you stepped me!”

“Ah, sorry Killua! I’ll be more careful.” Gon sheepishly replied.

Apologies said, his golden gaze returned to the people around them, jumping from one corner of the room to another as if looking for something, or rather someone in particular; the slight frown showing between his eyebrows indicating he was having no luck with it.

And Killua perfectly knew what it was all about.

“You don’t find him?” Killua asked softly as he squeezed Gon’s hand a bit tighter in his.

“Mh. I guess he didn’t come. Though I think I should have expected it.” Gon turned and faced Killua again with a little smile, but his eyes had a sad glint in them.

Every day that passed, Killua was more certain that Ging was one big asshole of a father, but Gon insisted he wanted to find him, and thus, Killua couldn’t do any other than give him all his support and help him in his search. But every time they took a step closer to finding the man, the faint path leading to him faded like it never existed and they had to start again from the beginning, with no clues whatsoever.

Killua thought Gon shouldn’t waste his time in finding a man that had abandoned his son and clearly didn’t want to reunite with him, doing everything in his hand to stay away from his reach. He himself had enough bad experience with his parents, and if he had had the possibility of having never met them, he would probably have had a much better life.

But Gon’s case was different, his past was different and he himself was different from Killua, so in some way, Killua thought Gon was in all his right of wanting to meet his father.

It had actually been Kurapika’s idea to invite Ging to the wedding. It wouldn’t be too weird, since Leorio currently occupied Ging’s former position as a Zodiac, and many other Hunters had been invited as well, so it was worth a try, even if they knew beforehand that the probabilities of him appearing in the celebration were very low.

And in the end, as all of them had expected, but Gon resisted believing, Ging hadn’t made act of presence.

“Hey, don’t worry too much about it. We already knew it was difficult he would come today, but he can’t keep escaping from you forever. One day, sooner or later, we’ll find him.” Killua smiled softly at Gon. “So just forget about him for now and enjoy the moment, okay?”

Gon visibly relaxed and a smile that was much more like him showed on his features.

“You’re right, Killua.”

“And when am I not?” He asked playfully with a smirk on his lips.

Gon giggled, now totally back to his usual self, all cheery smiles and easy laughter and bright eyes. He was beaming like he was under a spotlight and Killua loved when Gon was in that mood because he was pure as light itself.

For a moment, Killua almost forgot how to breathe, awestruck by Gon’s blinding brightness, but then the hand on his back held him tighter and Gon stepped a bit closer until their chests were almost pressing together and he was finally taken out of his reverie.

They kept dancing.

The melody fastened once again and their dance turned quicker. They swayed around with a new burst of energy, moving back and forth, legs almost flying, hands holding tightly and feet nearly stepping on each other’s but not quite. Killua felt light as a feather dancing with Gon, and Gon, so close to him that they were practically breathing the same air, seemed to move just as easily. Their dance was so natural and smooth that it felt like they were floating, like gravity didn’t work on them at all.

And as if wanting to prove it, Gon suddenly grabbed him tight by the waist with both his hands and lifted Killua in the air, spinning him around. Killua almost yelped at the unexpected motion, but instead he just clung to his soulmate circling his arms tightly around his neck. They swirled once, twice and thrice before Gon slowly put Killua on his feet, arms still around waist and neck and foreheads touching. The chuckles that had emerged from them quickly died and they just stared at each other’s eyes like nothing else mattered, as if they were in their own little bubble, completely ignoring the music sounding in the room and the rest of people still dancing around them.

After what felt like hours but were probably mere seconds, Gon took Killua’s left hand with his own, and he thought it was a sign to resume their dance, but instead Gon just stared at it, gently stroking his thumb over the flame mark permanently printed on pale skin.

Killua remembered how the appearance of that mark had changed his life for good. It had pushed them into lots of trouble, sure; but everything turned up good in the end, and now they could look at those marks not as a reminder of the other’s existence, as they had been in the difficult times when they had been forcefully separated, but as a reminder of the invisible connection between them and their shared lives and future.

While his family insisted those marks were a fatal curse inherited through bloodline, the flame that Killua would always carry on his wrist had given him, in fact, his greatest blessing. Because meeting Gon was the best that had happened to him in all his life and being able to stay by his side and love him and have those feelings returned back was like a dream come true to Killua.

In that moment, Gon pulled his hand closer to him until he pressed his lips on Killua’s mark. And just as if the drawing had come to life, the flame printed on his skin suddenly felt so warm, almost as if it was burning under Gon’s kiss. The heat flowed to the rest of his body and inevitably made his cheeks blossom in a light pink, but for once, Killua couldn’t care less about it.

They looked at each other and there was no need for words when their eyes showed every feeling buried in their hearts, when they were the mirrors of their souls. There was nothing but love in their gazes, and with just a glance, even the strangers dancing around them could probably decipher the message.

But it was okay. They wouldn’t hide their feelings to the world. And maybe someday, Gon and he could promise their love in front of everyone, just like Kurapika and Leorio did today. Though they were still young, and Killua was more than happy with what they had; he didn’t need anything else in that moment.

A new song started playing, way livelier than the previous one, and Killua didn’t think it twice, determined as he was to make the most of that moment, of every moment he could spend with Gon.

He slid his wrist from Gon’s grasp until their hands laced for the hundredth time that day and he took half a step back to better face his partner.

“Let’s dance, Gon.” Killua said grinning widely, almost as if it was a challenge.

And Gon, ever tireless and daring, obviously took it.

“Let’s dance, Killua.” He repeated, just as eagerly.

And so, they spent the rest of the evening dancing wildly like there was no tomorrow, even if they perfectly knew they would have thousands and thousands more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S FINALLY FINISHED!!!!
> 
> OMG it feels so weird to post the last chapter of this fic since I've been working on it for so long. This turned out to be way longer than I had expected, and is by far the longest story I've ever written (111 doc pages no less!!!) and I'm actually quite proud that I didn't gave up on it and kept writing and writing, and now, almost a year after I first started thinking and writing this story I can finally give it an end.
> 
> If you read till here, I just have to tell you THANK YOU SO MUCH for reading and giving this fic a chance  
AND DOUBLE THANK YOU to all of you who left kudos and comments as the story kept progressing. They really encouraged me a lot to keep going and I always love reading from you, so again THANK YOU
> 
> Hope you liked The Zoldyck Curse!!!


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